The Stretcher
Created | Updated Jul 8, 2009
The News You've All Been Waiting For
Thanks to all of you who voted for the final series of Stretcher submissions. The totals have been totalled and the tellers told, or whatever it is that tellers have done to them. It only remains to tell you all who's going through to the Final Challenge. And to spin things out a bit, of course. Build the suspense like they do on the telly. It's a pity that those inane long-pauses-before-the-naming don't really work in text. I suppose we could leave a few hundred lines of white space, only who wants to be stuck with a limitless expanse of white? I get enough of that back home, thanks very much. And there are sustainability issues, surely? Like causing unnecessary levels of scrollbar wear, right? So there'll be no white space...
...Just a bit more seemingly interminable rambling instead, if that's OK. Hey, what do you mean, it isn't OK? Look, it's not as if I'm getting paid for this or anything. I'm not Davina Bl**dy McCall. I'm only trying to create some anticipation, for all our sakes. I'm only trying to whip you up into a frenzy...
...Yeah, OK, point taken. Let's have the scores then.
The public vote is rendering the judges obsolete, just as we hoped it would. The same final three come through whether or not we include the judges' votes. And those three, in no particular order (like they seemingly always have to say), are Danny B, dmitrigheorgheni and Tibley Bobley. That means that this is the stage at which we say a fond farewell to Alex and Beatrice. You've both been stars. There's no dishonour in going out at this stage, certainly not against this trio.
For the last three, there's one more Challenge to go. It's set below. All three final Entries will be published in full in the next edition of the Post. There'll be no judging. We'll all vote as equals in a straight head-to-head to decide the Winner of the Stretcher.
Oh, and Challenge Entries from any and every Researcher are particularly encouraged in this final flourish (for the time being) of h2g2's own literary competition. Who knows, we might even persuade that old curmudgeon Rich to publish a couple of them alongside the Big Three.
The Final Challenge
No apologies if you saw this coming. The Challenge-setter for this last one is a bit better than the usual riff-raff. To start with, read this Guide Entry: Beyond the Brochure or Build it and We Will Come.
Think about the question in the last paragraph, and submit your answer to it in the form of a Guide Entry to either Peer Review or the Alternative Writing Workshop as appropriate. (Remember that this is a writing competition. An inventive idea for the answer might help, but originality in the writing will count for more than originality in the idea).
You have the usual period of one week to write and submit your Entry. The deadline is UK midnight on Thursday 16th July. Post to the Submissions thread below as usual too.
And for the last time, Good Luck!
Galaxy Babe, pailaway, Pinniped, and (in spirit) Skankyrich and Taliesin
