h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Paula Yates (1959-2000) - Author and TV Presenter - A5034070
Author: Galaxy Babe - U128652

Difficult to know what to put in and what to leave out - I hope I've done her proud anyway.

I haven't read this properly yet GB (Just about to go out to dinner). However, I think it needs an initial sentence to place who she is (e.g/i.e. TV presenter/former wife of Bob Geldof.
(I'M sure this ids in there somewhere, but it needs to be the first thing one reads, to place her)

Personally I prefer to read things in a more of a chronological order so the jumping about all over the place is a bit irritating to me. However you've put it in themed paragraphs which works too. I'd be interested to know what other people think about that.

I'd also take issue with an article about her which makes absolutely no mention of The Tube! http://www.nostalgiacentral.com/tv/variety/tube.htm

I found the way you've laid it out confusing too - for me it'd be easier to read if it was all in chronological order.

I prefer it themed (the themes seem chronlogical), but I agree, the tube may be worht mentioning, cause the bed is the only bit of tv mentioned

Oh, I've just spent half an hour removing all the themes.

It's on chronological order now, and I'm not happy with it.

If you're not happy then leave it how it was!

I thought the whole point of Peer Review was to take notice of what critics say.

"confusing"

"jumping about all over the place"

"prefer chronological order" (x 2)

I like it! There are a couple of single-sentence paragraphs at the beginning that slow the flow, but it soon picks up again.

A lot of sadness for one life.

'I thought the whole point of Peer Review was to take notice of what critics say'.

No, you don't have to. Just justify why you've chosen to do it your way, so that Scouts know that you've considered it.

PR is only suggestions. At the end of the day, it's your Entry.

Thank you!

It's hard to string paragraphs together when they don't follow on.

Putting it in chronological order has split the flow, and it needs a lot more work.

A tragic life indeed.

The thing is, now that you've changed it after 2 suggestions (and as BigAl says, they were just that, suggestions) no one else can join in the debate.

If you didn't want suggestions you should have made that clearer.

'Their relationship lasted 19 years;...' whose? (You need to iterate here)

But two out of the first three reviewers had complaints about the entry layout. "Confusing" and "bouncing about all over the place" was something I couldn't ignore.

If I'd have posted "I like it the way it is" it would have looked arrogant and I could have been accused of taking no notice of the reviewers.

'Their relationship lasted 19 years;...' whose? (You need to iterate here)

See, that was in the Bob Geldof section, in an entry about Paula Yates.

This is why the entry now needs more work.

Of course I changed the entry coelacanth, it was confusing and needed to be placed in chronological order.

'If I'd have posted "I like it the way it is" it would have looked arrogant and I could have been accused of taking no notice of the reviewers'.

Sometimes, if you can think of no other reason, you just have to say that. I don't think (most) Reviewers would find that arrogant. Everyone has opinions to which they're entitled and which they will state. But, at the end of the day, it's your Entry.

Hi Galaxy Babe,

I'm going to do something here that breaks the rules a little: comment on an entry before I've read it. Hopefully you'll see why at the end.

Looking at the subject, I would expect to find an opening paragraph that tells me that Paula Yates was a pop journalist and TV presenter who was at the heart of 1980s popular culture, but whose life began to take a tragic turn in the 1990s.

I'd expect a first section describing how she rose to prominence as (along with Jools Holland) the presenter of The Tube - Channel 4's ultra-cool pop show. Her flirty, irreverent, making-it-up-as-she-went-along style helped mark the show as different to the BBC's Top of the Pops.

At the time, she was married to Bob Geldof and as a consequence was present for the creation of Band Aid and Live Aid. Bob's career had been on the decline anyway, and although Band Aid made him very high profile, his efforts were unpaid. This left her as the main wage earner. From here, I'd probably expect discussions about their family, their children's odd names and their unconventional lifestyle.

In the 1990s, Bob set up Planet 24, the production company who gave us The Big Breakfast. Both Bob and Paula were presenters, with Bob doing very high-brow interviews with world leaders while Paula sprawled across a double bed to do celebrity interviews. It was during one such interview that she met Michael Hutchence, lead singer with Australian Rock band INXS. Their affair began that very day. With Paula effectively an employee of her husband, it became inappropriate for her to be hosting the show so she left. I'd expect a discussion of her relationship with Hutchence here, leading to the birth of their daughter and his death.

After Michael's death, there was one other blow for Paula as she discovered that her father, TV presenter Jess Yates, wasn't actually her biological father - that was Hughie Green (legendary presenter of shows like talent show Opportunity Knocks).

At that point, I'd expect the entry to conclude with her death, perhaps with a very brief wrap-up of what happened to her kids, which you go into in more detail in the Geldof entry.



That would be the kind of structure I'd expect, which leaves itself open to themes - The Tube, Live Aid, The Big Breakfast, Michael Hutchence, The True Father - while also running vaguely chronologically.

The reason I've done this without reading the entry first is that I think it might have restricted me from thinking clearly about a structure if I'd already seen how you'd approached it. This way, you can either look at this feedback as a clear way of ordering the entry or pride yourself in finding an alternative.

I'm so glad you've done this subject, GB. I used to think Paula was the coolest woman on telly, and it was quite odd when she got together with Michael Hutchence - from one of the coolest bands on the planet - because of the way it affected her, dressing dowdily, losing lot of her glamour. Terrible, terrible loss, both of them.

Just completely reworked it - thanks a lot Jimster.

I liked the entry GB, I haven't read it before though you re-worked it, I do think that it flows nicely though.

Thanks Z