h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

A whole umpteen weeks
Before seeing friends again
Far too long to bear.

Next: horrible evil exam boards

¦M¦

What kind of people
ask all the questions and have
no answers? Discuss.

Next: the perfect crime

Could a perfect crime
Be done in a perfect world?
Drama class said no.

(my Drama class btw, but I couldn't fit that in...)

Next: imperfect crime

¦M¦

oops, i shouldn't have
left all those crumbs around the
cookie jar. *wipes crumbs*

nt:

Is that just a wink
or are you a crazily
twitching psychotic?

Next: A knock-knock joke

incessant humour
an orange again? Oh no.
now a banana.

NT: Saftey pins

Safety Pins

Ouch! I always get bit -
the pin's unsafe, sadistic -
malevolently sharp!


*wonders off sucking a finger*

x x Fenny

Try to remember
to post a topic as well
after your haiku.

Next: ear wax

Orangey-yellow
Sticky, icky, foul-tasting
Filling up your ears

Next: eye-drops

¦M¦

"Sorry," I grovel,
looking at my dirty nail;
best use cotton buds.

Next: quantum physics

x x Fenny

Heisenberg's eye drops
were often administered
with uncertainty.

Next: spatulas

scoop it, scrape and lick,
smooth into corners then wait
twenty minutes, cake!

Next: Shift workers

Get out of the way
It is my shift to work now
You just go on home

Next: Shish-kabobs

Shish Kabobs

Sizzling chicken shish
barbecued under blue skies
Food falls on floor - F***!

F***!

I did it again! Sorry, long day!

Next: Wimpey Homes

My home's big and strong
In a fight it probably could
beat your wimpy home

Next: gorillas

Ballistic fighters,
Proud standing on buildings tall.
Banana bombings.

Something about monkeys please

Some people will say
Something about monkeys please
Other poeple won't

Next: tablecloths

¦M¦

Majestic cov'rage,
Chequered linen is beauty,
Tables never bare.


next up: down

Down's not, as people
Think, towards the ground but it's
Towards gravity

Next put down: up


¦M¦