h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Whew! That was a looong holiday season. It's good to be back to what passes for normal.

Normal? Is that any appropriate word to use here?

what do you mean, Hati, isn't this normal? I mean.. this is the average regular Crossed Purposes bar, isn't it?

...

unless you mean those hanging on the wall over there.. I've never seen those before is that for a new sort of game?

Still
I keptum azza Sue veneer of my incarserashun arfda a pardy on Noooyeers - wot a luvvly bunch of coppers dey wuz - very accommodating of my needs......even gave me me own bucket!

Luvly lads an' wonortoo even luvlier LASSES

WR

almost as easy to understand as your nornal accent WR

I had always assumed that my not understanding WR was due to my build up of earwax.

Yer needs to lern ta speek proper like woh I duz!

*Sprinkles a handful of pine needles over the sleeping Pan's blanket*

So it wasn't my bad english after all that I didn't understand WR?

Has anybody seen my cigarettes?

No. What do they look like?

*Starts an industrial size pot of for WR*

First, though, I'll mix you up a Bloody Mary with an extra dash of tabasco sauce and worchestershire. In fact, I'll mix up an industrial size batch for all of us.

yes please

With or without celery sticks?

With celery sticks please

you take the sticks and i'll take the salary

*Mixes up the Bloodys and passes them around. Doesn't mention the pair of ladies knickers hanging out from the 's back pocket.*

*sips Bloody and wonders how those girls go home with nekkid bottom*

they didn't. they already are home. backroom at rick's cafe in casablanca. hey, home is where your heart is, right?

*ponders on how fits a whole girl (except for the nickers) into his back pocket...

Must have a thing for VERY short and petite girls...

*downs yet another tomato juice to drive away the dreaded hangover...

WR

so your heart is pretty close to your back pocket

knickers?

* quick check *

not mine

You have to check..? I though females knew that sort of thing instinctively - us guys KNOW when we haven't got undies on - a sort of sinking feeling in the trouser leg or something akin to it...

*recalls an absentminded ex-girlfriend at school who forgot to put on her regulation green school cottons and walked about the cloisters commando-style all day...!*

Down, boys!

WR