h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OUCH!
*offers Angel-healing power to throbbing thumb....

*With a rending of giant tropical vines, and the loss of a couple of shirt buttons, Kes bursts through into the clearing, dragging Peaceful with him*
There! Look at that!
*A broken sound system lies on the floor, where it was pulled from the tree*
See - it was a recording.
*Kes tries to look like someone who has made a great discovery - not like a daft wazzock who fell over some wire and hurt his nose*

* Peaceful looks around, sees Kes, sees Tribal Council...

* "thinks"

* Decides she's seeing Kes and the Tribal Council.

It's alright, Peaceful. There's nobody here at the moment.
*But he still holds her close - after all, he did once watch a Tarzan movie*
It looks as if the Marshalls set up the tribal music to scare people away ...
Yet I do have a bad memory of this place - from when I was ill ...
You're shivering! Would you like to rest for a while?

* The eco of a throbbing thumb seems to linger in the air.

* The audience must know that Peaceful is no reflection of what a real life scientist is. Please, though she isn't overly bright, she means well + is just a character!!!

* She trembles slightly...

* There's going to be some voting going on soon...

* And you're going to win the million dollars, you know that Kes!
* Then it's fame and newspapers and bashes all over the planet for you Kes!!!

* She does sit down for a minute.

* The wish to steal the rest of his stamp collection - gone, for a moment...

We won't get to meet so often... and there was so much I wanted to tell you... so much time on the island, and I never...

*That sounds pretty good to Kes*
That sounds pretty good to me - but it isn't won yet. Besides, what would I do with that sort of money.
*Something dawns on him*
You seem to know what to do with that sort of money, don't you?
You're rich, aren't you?
*Wow! He thinks. She's rich and beautiful. Jackpot!!!!*
Anything else I should know about you - apart from the fact that you're fabulous?

... Is your nose alright?

Ooh!
*What was I asking her ... it's gone!*
Ah! It's nothing, Oeaceful, well, er, nothing that a kiss wouldn't cure.
Er, if you're feeling so inclined, that is?

* Simulpost does some very funny things indeed
* Peaceful had asked that question long before Kes had spoken...

Have you been speaking to Galaxy Babe?

How did you find out I was rich?

No secrets on this island, eh?

Yes. I am rich. I only have to catch up with my billionaire parents, you see.

...That's why I had a fractured personality problem when I came to Poco... They hop from one party to another, you see. I haven't seen them since I was five... But they will remember me, if I show them one of those 'before' pictures... I look exactly like both of them, especially like my mother did when she was twenty...

* Better kiss Kes while the going was good...

* the eery time reflection thing might be a Poco-problem... who knows?!

* It took all of Peaceful's brain power not to get lost in that kiss...

Oh wow Peaceful! What a kiss! That's mmmmmppff mmgrrgglle nnnmmnmmddmm!
*Caught off-balance, they fall backwards through the curtain of vines into their own special world.
A passing lizard notices an interesting configuration of toes protruding from the vines.
Time seriously passes*

* the wild music started playing in her mind...

* she collapsed into Kes' arms...

There has been another unexplained time shift on the island. Please disregard the clock times on the last two postings. We assure you that considerable time has passed.
Never mind how long.
Long enough not to embarrass a gentleman, and not so long as to embarrass a lady.
That's how long. OK?


*Kes and Peaceful emerge from the vines, glowing gently. Steam seems to be escaping from the cave behinf tham, but that's probably just another system error. They gaze languidly - you know, as one does.*
Peaceful.
Peaceful.
*Is the needle stuck?*

* If toes could giggle, her toes were giggling...

* Simulpost is very funny!

* Peaceful goes on helping Kes out with whatever he's doing...

* Despite the time shift in the Island... it had been fun, but her mind was going a bit blank...

* Peaceful turned on the 'automatic'... the adventure went on, but she was just going on with the flow...

* The flow must go on...

*The toes have resolved themselves into a publicly acceptable arrangement.

*The orchestra has finished playing Ravel's Bolero, packed up their instruments, and caught the last 'plane home.

*Thoughts in Kes's head are beginning to disobey the law of conservation of angular momentum.

*Keys on the keyboard have returned to where they ought to be.

*How does Peaceful look? Well, if her billionaire Mum had looked like that twenty years ago, there would have been a lot more 20-year old Peacefuls around right now.

*If anyone has a needle and thread, they could perhaps fix that newly-created slit in P's silk shirt, and we could all get our eyes and minds back on the plot.

*Then again we're a bit short on plot at the moment, so we'll settle for being a lot long on leg.