h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*A limo pulls up outside of the Celery's page. The door opens, and The Celery leads a very mouldy looking brownie out of it, and into the fairly impressive looking house. Within a few minutes, The Celery has some medical devices up, and is letting the Brownie heal*

The Celery-My friend, if there is anything that you require, do not hesitate to ask me. Push that button by your bed if you ever need to contact me while I'm out. You should be better in a few weeks. For now though, just rest. You look like you've seen some action.

Pins a "get well" card over the sleeping Crepuscular Brownie's bed.

*Stops by to wish the brownie well. Places a tasteful bouquet on the bedstand.*


I stopped at the 24-Seven and brought some antibiotics with me. But I see Crepuscular appears to suffering from an overabundance of penicillin mold.

Has anyone considered that bacteria should be introduced to counteract the mold?


*tiptoes out*

*Afgncaap5 looks in, and sees the note. He scribbles something on another note, and places that under the current note*


That might work, but this is a sentient brownie. Being sentient, we should assume that there may be something different in his molecular structure. So, while that might be the best idea, we should wait for a while and figure out which bacteria might be best in this situation (or whether or not they're needed).

*Drops in to see the brownie. Reads the notes.*

Hmmmm. Germs. Just might wo ... wo ... wo...

AAAAACCCHHHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

work.

*Enters the room and looks at CB with an evil glint in his eye. He walks over to the prone form of CB.*

Well, sir, and how are you feeling? Wait, let me answer that for you. You feel ill and neglected and used. You were brought here ostensibly to recover in a hospitable environment, under tender care. But where is that hospitable care? Seems that you were forgotten as soon as the election was lost, leading you to conclude that you were just a political instrument of The Celery.

Yes, I refer to The Celery in the third person, because I am not he. I am his twin and I have a much better handle on reality and a much better future in store for me. I have many plans, starting with kidnapping a leading member of h2g2 and thereby acquiring enough ransom to fund my other plans.

And I have plans for you, too, if you care to give up this, er, existence, and want to become very powerful. Come away with me now and I will give you a proper education and set you on the road to your rightful place. How does leader of the Church of Crepuscular Brownie strike you? Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha.

*Leads CB out.*