The Celery

2 Conversations

Thanks for all your support!

This is the home page for The Celery, candidate for Virtual Prez of h2g2. Visit my Campaign Headquarters.

Come in and make yourself at home. There's some tasty water here, so please help yourself.Hope you don't mind that I took my tie off. I like to be a little more informal here at home!

Ask the candidate a question.

I really care about all creations at h2g2.

Visit my h2g2 Fish Sanctuary and Playground where there is a safe place for h2g2 fish to swim.

Official Bio

High above h2g2 orbits the h2g2 Space Centre. On this space centre, is a Biome, run by Garius Lupus, the head gardener of the space station. In this Biome, GL and other members of Crater Labs, Inc. have been experimenting with plants and have, among other accomplishments, managed to amplify the inherent intellegence of many plants. One of the most notable of these sentient plants is The Celery.

Right from the beginning, the Celery had a strong sense of justice and duty and soon became a spokesman for the more downtrodden members of the Biome community: the grasses and mosses. After winning a campaign for more 'Do Not Step on the Grass' signs, a wave of grassroots support swept him to power as Biome Chairman. Under his even-handed governance, the community thrived and the Biome was a safe place to put down roots. He effectively handled the threat to the community posed by the Kudzu family by isolating them and sealing them off in a remote corner.

Due to his popularity, his rule would have continued indefinitely, had it not been for unfortunate unsubstantiated rumours of a scandal involving various combinations of peanut butter, cream cheese and cheez-whiz. The allegations were never proven and were categorically denied by The Celery, but he nevertheless decided that for the good of the community, he should step down. After a sorrowful resignation speech, he appealed to the workers from CLI to take him to their labs on h2g2, to remove him from the site of his sorrow. Of course, the CLI employees complied and provided a home for him in their fridge.

While in the fridge, The Celery again rose to prominence, this time organizing the loose society he found there. He campaigned for better temperature regulation, an end to the infamous 'lights out when door closes' policy and for removal of unidentifiable ancient foodstuffs.

His most recent campaign involved a protest over the removal of all entities from the fridge while it housed the pre-operative web jello. Once he realized it was for the safety of those involved, he relented
and observed with interest the 'operation' that the web jello underwent. After the operation, Celery became friends with the Jello and saw her political potential.

It was then that the idea of running for h2g2 office came to him. He could see all the good he could do, with The Jello by his side, and so he felt it was his duty to run.


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