h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

(a) Rex Harrison - well spotted JT!

(b) That's OK - no need to apologise, there are worse things than subbing entries on Italian pronunciation....well cool, I'd say, if you can do it

Sorry for the letters...


Grime

Actually, it was quite an interesting piece. Now I can order gnocci with confidence... of course, paying for it is still shaky ground.

Letters? I don't recall seeing any that were disturbing, frightening, or offensive in any way ... perhaps I should have another look. No need to apologise, anyway.

JTG

The letters - my use of (a) and (b).

I thought you were mildly complaining in 17 about my use of them in 16.


Grime

Oh, good heavens, no! That's a use of letters that doesn't bother me in the least. It's uses like,

"Dear John, I've met someone else...."

or...

"Please report to Human Resources tomorrow..."

... that I take exception to. Also, the letters on my keyboard tend to take flight in a disorderly fashion sometimes, resulting in senntennces thaiit look like bibberish... even when the idea I want express isn't... necessarily.

JTG

Dear John, I've met someone else.......oh, sorry, a slip of the keyboard


OK, JTG, thanks4 clearntht up 4me.


Grime



Oh, and would you mind reporting to Human Resources tomorrow?

There's something that strikes me as sinister about the term 'Human Resources' . I always imagine the people who work there to be disguised mantids, who collect humans and turn them into interesting crafts and curios....[]...

JTG

JTG, you've got it again, by George.....

Also 'Human Resources' turns people into things to be used and exploited just by the terminology, compared with Personnel

- dehumanisation, alienation and other rude words spring to mind (copyright Uncle Karl M)


Grime

'xac'ly!

I think that's because the people who work in HR breathe an atmosphere too rich in jingoism, buzzwords, and catchphrases for the average chap to survive in or take seriously. Trouble is that so much of where we live is under the malevolent influence of the HR 'professional' that it's a hard job to escape ...

JTG

'it's a hard job to escape'......p'raps that's partly why we join things like h2g2...

Human Resources ...a bunch of no-good jerks who'll be first up against the wall when the revolution comes...I can't remember the quote exactly, but you know what I mean...


Share and Enjoy


Grime

Yep. Long live the revolution!

O' course, it's possible to imagine someone being caught by accident in the trap of having to do something like HR jingo juggling for a living, someone who is bored to tears by the tedium and the pretense of having to take all the pseudo-psychology and creative management nonsense seriously . It would be unkind of us to make somelike feel unwelcome and unloved .

JTG

Yes, that's true. They'd be in the worst situation of all if they haven't been brainwashed so they'd need the utmost charity.


Grime

I don't think I've ever actually met anyone like that though. Have you?

JTG

Not really. In my somewhat limited experience the personnel people tend to get sacked or moved on to make way for human resources people or thoroughly retrained themselves into the new ways of not thinking or feeling too much.

Still, I speck only the nice ones would be in h2g2 anyway. You need a sense of humour to be nice - and I suspect you need no sense of humour whatsoever to be in HR

Not forgetting that HR does the dirty work for others


Grime

Yes, that pretty much jives with my experience too. Still, it's funny that people who sit at the top of the management pyramid, who, presumably, must have been people at one time, are almost unanimous in turning over the maintenance of the people who work for them to vampires .

JTG <--- in lieu of garlic

Oh, well, another day, another dollar, I suppose, that's the main thing

Getting upset about it would only get you upset about it?


Grime

I'm luckier than most, I suppose. Nobody much concerns themselves with what I do, on a daily basis. As long as things look... well, not even good... as long as people aren't getting poked in the eye by wildly unkempt shrubs or losing their children and pets in dense thickets of brambles, the shirt and tie set pretty much leaves me alone... with a corporate purchasing card (my magic ticket), the fools!

JTG

Hence JT Gardener, I presume It sounds idyllic, but in my case someone would have to do the gardening for me, as I hate it so I'd have to employ someone to do it, and probably a Human Resources team to make sure I get my money's worth


Grime

Hate gardening? Be careful about planting Human Resources in your garden: Once established, they'll spread all over the place; and you'll never get rid of them.

I really wouldn't do anything else... in fact, I really don't . It's often less than idyllic, though. Sometimes it feels the way I imagine it must to decorate a lunatic asylum or a monkey house. W C Fields must have had gardeners in mind when he said, 'Anyone who hates children and small dogs can't be all bad.'... or something to that effect.

JTG

Must beat the corporate life hands down, though

W.C. Fields....favourite comedian, favourite quote, though his epitaph 'I'd rather be here than in Kansas' (approx) runs it close

Grime

I've not had much to do with the corporate life, except in its Townhall manifestation; and that's enough for me to know when I'm well off.

Golden moments of the silver screen:

WC: "Why don't you come up and see me sometime?"

Mae West: "Don't mind if I do-o-o..."

JTG