h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm going to start my own true scandal! The Celery is dead! Finally, justice has been served! I've killed him and Webjello! http://www.h2g2.com/F49946?thread=68145&post=519801

Not since H.G. Wells broadcast 'The War of the Worlds' making millions of people believe that... Oh, well, it's not that good. But still Big C's movie is entertaining in a Mystery Science Theatre 3000 kind of way, so come over to the Celery/Webjello Formal Dinner thread at http://www.h2g2.com/F49946?thread=68145&post=519801 and join in the fun. Formal attire is no longer required. Popcorn, funnel cakes, and cotton candy are being served! Also, there is a mock funeral at http://www.h2g2.com/F40374?thread=69810 Dolores will be there, (we're hoping they'll let her deliver her own eulogy :-)), and The Celery may stop by to speak as well, so come on over, join in, and we'll have a funeral party!

Just an update on the proceeding folks:
Check the forum both I and RB have mentioned...I think you'll find RB's making excuses again...

Thanks for the entertainment Big C. Nice work!

Sorry folks, but that movie has ended and we've moved on to other movies. Currently showing is 'Murder by Death' by Neil Simon, but it doesn't have anything to do with the political campaign, so sorry for the interruption here.

Hey, in my opinion The Big C was doing what your team has been doing since the campaign started: altering reality to suit yourselves. If you deny that what he did ever happened, then you deny that The Celery ever existed.
And if you try to claim that it was a movie, then you are still doing what you've been doing: manipulating somebody else's work to suit yourselves.
And if you aren't claiming anything, then the fact still remains that The Celery is a creation not a real person, and therefore still is a breach of the campaign Terms and Conditions.
QED.

Hmmm.. Altering reality to suit ourselves. True. Well, virtual reality, anyway. You see, that's one of the really cool things about h2g2 community. We're always altering virtual reality, and some pretty incredible things come from that. The space ship I live in, the h2g2 Waterworks, picnics in the h2g2 park, getting a cup of coffee from the IIEM at the Aroma Café -- those are all part of altering reality to suit ourselves, and part of the fun of being at h2g2.

The difference with what Big C did (which was quite interesting), was that he attempted to alter SOMEONE ELSE's reality. It's really the equivalent of me dropping a nuclear bomb on the Aroma Café. The café was created by Irv to suit himself, so why not destroy it to suit myself. Well I think Irv would be upset. He could choose to accept it -- decide he had enough of the café and leave it a radioactive hole in the ground. But more likely he would be forced to ignore or negate the effect of the bomb on his own creation, and continue the café unchanged, and he would probably not be very happy with me. (If you're reading this, Irv, this was just hypothetical )

The Celery is an h2g2 creation. Because of this, you may think The Celery isn't real -- that he is no more than the equivalent of an empty glass at the F&F to be discarded. But for many of us, he is much more. In this virtual world, he has as much reality to us as The Café, or the Waterworks. Virtual creations are part of the wonderful magic of h2g2, and creations like Ook, The Waterworks, The Celery, and others add a richness to this world. It should not be surprising then, in a _virtual_ race for Prez, in a _virtual_ community, that a _virtual_ creation should participate. It's just part of the wonderful imaginative world we enjoy here.

As far as the Terms and Conditions of the campaign, let's take a look at them (from http://www.h2g2.com/A387308)

1. Have a running mate to act as your Vice!
Yes. Dolores Webjello is the running mate

2. Be prepared to put forwards a statement of intent to the h2g2 community.
Yes. In the Post a few weeks ago (in fact, quite a number of statements have been put forward! )

3. Be prepared to submit a picture for the Rogues Gallery (Your voters want to see something even if it's a neat cartoon!).
Yes. In the rogues gallery. Nice pictures of The Celery and Dolores. He's wearing a particularly dapper bow tie in that one.

4. Be prepared to have the dirt dished about you or your running partner! ( No campaign is complete without Rumours and Scandal!)
Yes. I think it's safe to say that dirt has been dished

5. Be prepared, in the event of actually winning, to make regular statements to your constituents through your friendly news media: The POST.
Yes. Considering he has already made more statements in the Post than most of the other candidates, I think he'll be able to handle this one.

and finally:
'Rules and Regulations.
Anyone from anywhere may apply.'
Yes. That seems pretty inclusive.

Sorry if I'm rambling on again! Couldn't resist the opportunity to get in a few more positive points about my favourite candidate!

Redbeard
Chief Political Operative
Celery/Webjello 2000
http://www.h2g2.com/A383267

Listen, Redbeard, I got angry yesterday not because you once again resurecte The Celery, but because you either failed to read my carefully constructed post, or you directly contradicted it on purpose!
Look, at the very top of my post it said that it *did* happen, which means it wasn't a movie...
But then in the post after that, you said it *was* a movie! Now that is cheating in its worst form...

I'm writing an article on VR and RL, inspired by these turns of events...I'm about to post it, so I'll get the URL down here ASAP...

Here we go...
http://www.h2g2.com/A414181

I suggest you have a good look at it Redbeard...and *read* it this time!!

Big C, you have missed one minor detail here. It wasn't Redbeard who decided to call it a movie, it was me. I posted the rewrite with my MST3K comments inserted. Redbeard merely followed my lead and supported me.

I realise that you are very proud of your story, and I realise that you wanted to get Garius Lupus and Afgncaap5 involved and have a wonderful time acting out a great big science fiction story that you had thought up.

But Afgncaap5 is currently away IRL. Garius has also had a few days off and needs to catch up on professional matters IRL. Three other members of the CWJ campaign staff responded to you right away, which, if it were me, I would have found quite gratifying. You brought about a big scene, you advertised it all around, you got other candidates involved, and you even brought Shazz into it. If you had swooped down on some of the other tickets like you did on the Celery, you might not have received an answer for weeks!

Don't you think we should move along to some new kind of fun now? With your imagination, you should be terrific at Calvinball!

Maybe we should have a Prez challenge game of Calvinball.

Redbeard, what you were saying about changing someone else's reality... I agree wholeheartedly with this. For the record, I was just supporting the assassination of The Celery to be awkward.

But I'd like to point out the incident in Bluebottle's sewers a while ago - when The Celery's team were determined to undermine Bluebottle's good reputation by convincing everyone that he had a raw sewage outlet into the beach or whatever. Bluebottle didn't create this - you lot did. You were altering his reality. Do I sense a bit of discontinuity?

(oh and I'm aware that I'm the definition of discontinuity myself, I'm not denying that )

Thanks, Peregrin. Well, for the record, I thought you were delightfully awkward!

Point taken on the sewers. I wondered briefly about that myself. But in Styx's defense, he was exploring, and you have to do some creating when you explore or you can't get anywhere. He probably didn't know about BB's environmental interests. And as for the rest of us? We just piled on afterward to be awkward.

DD, I think a Prez challenge game of Calvinball could be quite a lot of fun. And scary. And surreal. But fun I love the idea!

Peregrin - I think you are right, but it is a matter of degree. The sewer incident could have been easily and creatively turned by BB by using his imagination. The death of Celery would be difficult to turn. One is a water pistol, the other a howitzer.

Styx's sewer gambit could indeed have been easily turned. Perhaps Styx should ask why they didn't mention a nanotech refiltration plant further up the pipe! Remember, part of his journey out of the sewer took place along a natural passage. He then climbed up to the regular level, made a face at the camera, and sprinted out the sewer.

Styx never complained about suffered any illness or distress from effluent or contamination, even though he must have splashed along in the water and even flumed into the stream right below it. The Peregrin-DD team was caught flat-footed, expecting Styx to mobilise the rats, and failed to think creatively, deciding to argue the point instead. Styx couldn't have said ANYTHING about what was further up the tunnel, because he hadn't been there.

Remember that this campaign is about creativity, but that a well-made safari, adventure or joint story (which this is) should always give the others room to move. Killing the Celery does not allow the others (us) room to move. It is pre-emptive and final. And mean-spirited. We should all bear in mind that the final event of this story is the announcement of the results. The voters are going to make their decision based on our creativity, our imagination, and how we have demonstrated our ability to foster goodwill and good spirit (and entertaining reading) on h2g2. A good laugh is a shared laugh.

Planet of Hell! My scandal forum's got a bit longer in my absence!

Lil, I posted something somewhere about my Big Post...erm...now where did I put it? Erm, can't remember the URl, but it's in Redbeard's VR discussion forum somewhere..

Dashes in with the URL for The Big C to give to Lil. http://www.h2g2.com/F40621?thread=70012&post=523226 :-)

(And they say my thought police will cause problems. There hasn't been this much to do since someone burned down the forest around the Aroma Café. Irv was away, but Lil seemed less than pleased. She was even less pleased when someone else hijacked one of her creations to use as their own. Please everyone, don't do anything to wreck someone else's H2G2 creation. I am one)

*coughs:*
Big Brother!
*stops coughing*

And yes, so what if you're an only child? In 1984, Big Brother didn't even exist! It was fantasy!
(no, fantasy, not VR...)

I've uncovered a new rumour... I'll make a new conversation about it

I don't exist, either. I'll check out that new rumour, Peregrin.