h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

A couple more hints might at least give us some sort of preparation...

Use shovels as clubs???

I tend to use a cricket bat, but that may just be tradition.

Are... so are we coming across a mutated cricketball you keep under the pub?

Some terrible connotations to cricketballs/cricket in general...

It has nothing to do with cricket, It was just that a cricket bat was the first thing that came to hand.

Okay, so WHAT IS IT?!?!?
Just tell us, or let us dig!

But mentioning its name makes it more likely to appear.

Oh, okay then. We'll just carry on, arm ourselves with some shovels, and hope for the best.
*Digs away*
Come on - we've a pub's cellar to raid!

Good argument.
*picks up shovel, is about to dig when something occurs to him, then thinks for a (rare) moment*
Heard something of a muffled explosion coming from somewhere in the vincinity of the Aroma Cafe a while ago.
*thinks harder; after a while of considerable concentration *
Maybe we can find someone who'll lend us some dynamite??

I hadn't tried that.

There's always a first time...

In this case, it might be the last, though.

I doubt that, he is rather resilliant.

Who is "he"?
And what is the worst that can happen? If we meet anything, we'll just get them drunk, then get us drunk, and then be happy.
Okay - carrying dynamite, let's go!

Its more of an it really, and you'll see it soon enough. If you decide to continue.

I'm certainly carrying on - can't give up now!

Thats what you say now, but it eventually there will be lots of running. Followed by lots of screaming.

Sounds good to me - I could do with some excercise.
As long as there's lots of drinking afterwards

Doesn't scare me... *sniffs*

I can slide whatever it is to the zoo

I don't think it would like that.

Well, I've got my own Monster Preservation Society going in the waterworks' sewers, so it can always have a home their. And in the sewers I've dealt with all sorts of weird, wonderful and scary monsters, so I think I've got the experience for whatever it is...