h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh yes, it was an excellent experience. No emergencies at all. It's been abnormally calm.

How typical!

*She wheels over to the computer and prods it*

I see you've been playing my games, I can always tell because things get moved around slightly. Hope you enjoyed them though. I'm thinking of getting new ones that aren't so similar to how our lives seem to be going right now. Although I like the Star Trek ones because if you shoot your ally too much he says "Right that's it!" and guns you down. Part of me has always wanted to see if that would happen here...although of course then we would have to clear up the mess.

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How's our Jaffa doing? Up and about yet? I did leave instructions for him didn't I?

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<<Okay let's have a quick spin round this. Let's say our resident Jaffa recovered, and is back in his barracks, taking a bit of R&R, with instructions to return to the med bay for a checkup before returning to duty.

Prof and Jack, you've been on refresher courses - you decide what you refreshed in >>

*Kat wheels round the med bay checking everything is in its right place before smiling and filling the coffee machine*

Ahhhh now we're back in business!

*She starts filling in reports for the colonel and filling in stock request forms at her desk, absent-mindedly tapping a fountain pen against her teeth*

*walks in*

Captain Kat?

*Kat wheels back from her desk, revealing a slight smattering of black ink on her lower lip, and quickly puts the pen on the desk in the middle of the report*

That would be me airman. How can I help you?

I was ordered to report for a medical.

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I see, you've just arrived on base then I take it? Got your transfer papers with you? I've probably got a note somewhere about you but I've only just come back on duty so bear with me.

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Here are the transfer papers

*hands over transfer papers which read:

Name:Thanaris Thamian Meridian
Age: CLASSIFIED
Rank: Lieutenant
Section: SG-6 (SGC)
Blood type: O positive
Medical training: Standard military first aid course

There are also various notes at the bottom stating previous injuries, including various incidents of getting shot*

*Kat nibbles her lip as she runs over the transfer papers, pulling a sheet from the filing cabinet next to her desk and fixing it to a clip board from the top of the cabinet*

Okay then, if you could strip down to your shorts then...*she starts writing on the form*...we'll run through a quick checkup and then you can go and dump your stuff. It won't take too long.

*looks around to check that no-one else is looking then, satisfied that there is no-one else there, does as ordered*

~~this had better not take long~~

I already dumped my stuff in a spare locker.

*Kat raises an eyebrow*
You fit all your belongings, uniform, and equipment in one locker? Be careful lieutenant, the colonel won't tolerate arrogance.

*she wheels across the room to the opposite wall, where a set of scales stand next to a height measure*

If you could step up on the scales please...

*she waits while he does and notes the amount*

And if you move across here under the measure please...

*she pulls a string gently until the measure sits atop Meridian's head, leans back to see, and notes it down*

Step back to this line and read the lowest line that you can from that chart on the wall please.

*reads 7th line down*

g...k...z...erm, its either a t or a y.

Okkaayy...yup thank you
*she marks it down*
that's fine.

*she places the clipboard on her lap and wheels into the next room*

If you'll follow me...

*when he does she shows him the treadmill*

I'm going to get you on this jogging, with these monitors on your chest and arms just to check that everything's alright with your breathing and heart.

If you could lean down a bit...

*she pastes the diodes onto Meridian's chest and upper arms and prods him gently onto the treadmill*

Here we go then...*she turns the treadmill up to a gentle trot and the monitor makes a faint beep*

So, whilst you're doing that, tell me a bit about yourself. Where do you come from? What have you been doing? What do you like?

The where I come from bit is actually classified, but Otherwise I'm from the UK.

What have I been doing? Standing around and training really, before I got this assignment that is.

And my likes are varied. I like reading, playing computer games and various types of music.