h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*decends wearing a mortar board (with holes for her antennae) and a black gown (so convenient for the multi-limbed) trimmed with faux-ermine*

Go Kat is a brand of cat food. It struck me as funny. But after this much just about anything seems funny.

*walks in gets a drink and some food and grabs a seat*

Congrats to all of you. Excellent!

Courtesy

Hurrah for Z and Kat and Scan and anyone else who deserves a 'hurrah'!

*Sits down with an extremely large dram.*

*Houndstooth begins making the rounds placing a heart-shaped menu card at each place setting*

Nope, not a Valentines Day menu folks. In honor of our new physician, I have prepared a heart healthy feast. I promise you that everything is so tasty, you won't even know you're eating healthy.

You won't find any of this healthy stuff over at the Diner, so enjoy it while you can.

Our appetizers are fresh fruit cups in little heart-shaped bowls and a large variety of fresh veggies on heart-shaped platters with a scrumptious low-fat yogurt dip. We have bruschetta (cut into the shape of hearts)lightly brushed with olive oil and garlic and broiled to perfection.

Okay. So I ~do~ have a few items left over from Valentine's Day. Waste not, want not as my fourth wife's mother used to always say.

Soups are a rich vegetable soup made with all fresh vegetables in a fat-free chicken stock, a broccoli cheese soup that is so rich and flavorful you'd never know it was a low fat version of the old favorite, a tomato bisque, and a marvellous seafood chowder that substitutes a heart healthy trans-fat, cholesterol free margarine for the butter. Help yourself to those cute heart-shaped soup bowls. Hell, take some of them home with you when you go.

The main course is a choice of broiled trout, poached salmon, grilled cornish game hens, or a tender swiss-style steak made with lean sirloin. We also have vegetable kebabs, linguini in a fat-free marinara sauce, and a surprisingly low fat version of the Dandelion Diner's famous chicken and noodles.

Sides include steamed rice, boiled new red potatoes, fresh asparagus, corn on the cob grilled in their husks, new peas, sauteed sugar snaps, whole steamed wax beans, and Waldorf salad made with a light mayonnaise dressing.

You'll notice we don't have any broccoli on the menu. Healthy doesn't have to mean broccoli. And with all these veggies, why the heck do you need a salad? Ok. Just kidding. I have one salad. And it's a dandy one. A combination of red and yellow cherry tomatoes, chopped cilantro,and chopped red onions marinated overnight in a seasoned vinegrette, then tossed with ceasar croutons and freshly shredded Parmigano Reggiano. Absolutely delicious.

Dessert is that lovely large cake in the center of the center of the table that is, believe it or not, fat-free. It is a cherry chocolate cake so rich and moist you'll think you have died and gone to heaven when you taste it, topped with more cherries and sprinkled with just a dusting of powdered sugar. We also have skewers of angle food cake, pineapple, strawberries and grapes drizzled with a sweetened rum sauce and a lovely low-fat, sugar-free trifle with strrawberries, raspberries and blueberries.

Enjoy. And take home some of the heart-shaped napkins.

Oooh what a wonderful spread Wolfgang - how marvellous!

*samples a bit of all the vegatarian options and makes delighted 'Oohing' nosies*

*Wanders in, looks around, puts on a labcoat and wanders around.*

*helps herself to a cup of the cheese/broccoli soup, and a plate on which she crams some cornish game hen, asparagus, wax beans, and new potatoes*

New potatoes! I'm always too lazy to do these for myself. Pass the margarine, please.

*wanders in, a bit late, and sorts through pile of assorted clinical clothing until she finds white clogs, white trousers and fuchsia pink clinical jacket

*gratefully accepts glass of from bot, blows kisses to Z, Kat, Scandrea & T - and the rest of the company - before making her way to the table

Congrats first to Dr. Z. This is from the first batch of Marv the Grate's Winery. It's a green apple reisling.

COngrats to Kat and SC as well. I've bottles for the both of you. I am saving a special bottle for MR for when she finishes her thesis.

*enters, dons a yellow lab coat to match her new yellow garden show sandals and twirls to show off her new haircut*

Fab decor Amy.

And Wolfgang, you know that you're going to have to give me this cake recipe.

A toast to our graduates!

*waltzes in, wearing her mother's old gown over lilac scrubs, and hands large boxes of chocolates to all those celebrating*

Amy, it looks great.

Congratulations everyone, I hope that you have a fab night.

*Decides that the "something of everything" approach is probably best given the scrummy spread and proceeds to follow this prescription.*

*skips in wearing a fetching sky blue labcoat and matching surgical pants, as well as a pair of comfy bunny slippers, waves Hi! to all, and Congrats! to the guests of honor*

"Wow, what a great theme and what a spread! Amy, and Wolfgang, this is amazing! (And healthy to boot, I hear! )"

*gratefully fetches a and heads for the buffet table, gleefully; following sage wisdom, she samples just a tiny bit of ... well, EVERYTHING*

"Oh, YUM!"

Let's get rolling on the toasts!

*raises her * To those who have just achieved or who stand on the threshold of significant academic achievement, we salute you!

Hear Hear!

And Might I add a special toast to GDZ who is rekindling his collegiate carreer.

*raises for the toast*
Congratulations to Dr Z and Scan!

Right I think I'm going to go from the menu and I'm going for...

Bruschetta and Broccoli cheese soup, followed by game hen, and I'll have to have one of those vege kebabs as long as there are enough left for our vegetarians to stuff, with new potatoes, corn on the cob and new peas.

*gestures to a bot who brings her the bruschetta and a bowl of soup*

Maybe I'll become a professor eventually. I'm quite liking the whole Dr Z thing and I think Professor Kat sounds good.

*Enters just in time for the toasts, wearing pyjamas and dressing gown. An outfit that has always been her favourite and most comfortable and not worn to a party since she was seven. Although those were not the same pyjamas and dressing gown. On her feet are the slip on shoes she bought a couple of weeks ago, turkish slipper style in leather.*

*raises her (Pol Roger, natch)*

Congratulations to DrZ and Scan!

* admires Caerwynn's beautiful shoes. Decides this party needs some dancing and gently chivvies everyone into two lines, facing each other.

"Matina, can you organise some suitable music for an Orkney Strip The Willow"

*Gentlemen bow and ladies curtsey as the music begins. The dance is executed perfectly - each couple birling and twirling their way down the line, in turn. Thanks to the special contained within the everlasting everyone automatically 'knows' the steps.

*Having arrived just in time to be whirled into the Strip the Willow and not to actually eat anything, Ag stumbles away from the dancers at last and dives happily into the food. She is wearing a lab coat over fetching pink silk pyjamas, in honour of the junior doctor who once set her arm with his pyjama-top still on under his own lab coat*

*has trouble adapting the steps to the legs but has a go anyway*

*Wanders in, Is very impressed
But decides to go find somewhere quiet to sit instead.*