h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I often, while either ludicrously drunk or half way through a pickled onion, think that America solely exists for the amusement and pleasure of the rest of the world

Then how do you explain -

everything about it?

Perhaps the exception that proves the rule?

During my assignment in the subject country, I have observed that (whether exceptional or not), most Americans are utterly oblivious to the amusement or distress they inflict upon "Continentals" of whatever variety. (This generalization does not include the group representing a variation on "American" known as "Canadian," who can be identified by the undivided and angst-ridden attention they pay to EVERYONE's opinion regarding their national character.) While undeniably a source of amusement for many, the average American is generally found to be far more jovial than his European counterpart, largely due to the benefits of isolated oblivion, that permit him to indulge intemperately in alcohol, ogling shapely young women, recreational drugs, thinking about ogling shapely young women, fanatical commercialism, talking about ogling shapely young women, and -- oh yes -- finding thin but politically correct justifications to his female counterpart for spending the greater part of his discretionary hours in a search for occasions for ogling shapely young women.

Each and every one of them admires the English, less for anything the English have done, than for how "smashing" it all sounds when pronounced in The Queen's Tongue. (The rest of the royals appear to be pretty much taken with their OWN tongues at present, which provides just one more source for tabloided amusement for your average Yank.) The American national perception that their forbears were instrumental in assuring that your average Londoner didn't end up speaking German may or may not be justified. BUT, it's certain that if an occasion of equal danger to the Isles ever presents itself, for better or for worse, they'll be willingly boarding ships to head "over there," all over again. Call it sappy sentimentalism, or "cousinly regard," but it's probably true.