h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, let me see how it works again. Here, try it on this egg.

[Y2K fires the Chefinator (set to Deep Fat Fry) at the egg. I don't know what would happen IRL to an egg that's been deep-fat-fried, but nevertheless this is what happens to the egg]

Ooooooooo. Ahhhhhhhhhh.

Here, try it on this.

*hands the clones a golf ball.*

[Y3K] Let's see if I can hit it moving ...

[He tosses the golf ball into the air, fires at it, misses, and the ceiling gets deep fat fried]

[Y3K] Sorry.

Hmmmm. We might have to put a warning in the users manual for that sort of thing.

Um, .. can I try it for a minute?

[The clones confer among themselves for a bit, and then turn back to GL. They twist the handles of their lightsabers and are surrounded by shields: Y2K has a red one, Y3K has a green one, and Y4K has a purple one. Y2K hands GL a Chefinator]

*Affy blinks a few moments, tthen realizes that Minoova isn't there anymore. In fact, after pausing to read the *TWO WEEKS* worth of backlog, he sees that the Minoova Project is over*

Well. Never zoned for that long before. GL, try that on this thing. It's supposed to be a delicassy in the Rodentar system.

*Puts a strange looking, purplish plant on the floor*

[After an excruciatingly tense moment ...]



[...Y4K breaks wind!]

[Y4K] Oh! Sorry.

*GL sets the chefinator to fry and aims it at the plant. He pulls the trigger and ...

There is a small explosion as some flamable gas ignites briefly within Y4K's shield. The purple plant shrivels like cooked spinach.*

Hmmm. Another warning for the users manual, I think.

*The shrivelled purple plant starts to surrepititiously inch its way towards the door, while slowly regaining its original shape.*

[Y2K] [to Y3K] You idiot! You failed to remove diode 2J85C709Q4-2 in that one!

[Y3K] Oh no! We'd better fix it!

[Confusion ensues. Y2K shoots the walking plant, while Y4K sets his own to "Super Overcook" and shoots GL, who reflexively drops the Chefinator he is holding into the path of the beam. The Chefinator GL dropped is vaporized]

[Y4K] ...Sorry!

*The purple plant again shrivels, and again begins to move towards the door, but this time a little faster. No one notices in the confusion.*

Well, I think CLI can manufacture these. They seem to be quite useful. I'll check with Affy to be sure and get back to you soon.

*The purple plant makes it out the door and around the corner.*

Say, where did that plant go?

[All three] I know nothing!

*Affy pushes a button on his watch, and the PA speakers scattered throughout the CLI Complex turn on. Affy speaks into the watch*


All droids, bots, aliens, and projects, be on the lookout for a purplish plant crawling through the corridors. It may appear fried.