h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Possibly, but one of the wisest Aes Sedai currently living reckons she found an ancient record in the archives of the White Tower which said that it lacked the buffer which makes other angreal safe to use. Basically, it's incomplete, although there's always the chance that one of the Forsaken tampered with it to make it unsafe in the hope of killing the future Dragon Reborn - which nearly worked, incidentally.

* opens a small gateway to drinks cabinet and brings through glasses and a bottle of sherry *

Care for some sherry before dinner?

Uh ... over here it's 10:15 ... in the morning.

11:28 in the morning here, depending on where here is

love some sherry, thanks!

And now it's 8:45 at night!

Well... I was thinking of having dinner, and rather enjoying the notion as well. YK, I see you've taken a downturn in status over the last couple of posts. Oh well, I suppose you didn't get busted back to Padawan, which would be hideously embarrassing - kinda like an Aes Sedai getting busted back to Accepted or even Novice, or an Asha'man getting knocked back to Dedicated, or Soldier. Ouch.

Ain't life fun when you can sit back and watch it happen to other people?

No, not really, I just thought that the BlainesFreet™ bit was more or less clutter and saying I was a "great" Jedi Knight would be lying, so I replaced the BlainesFreet™ clutter with the "not-quite-so-great" clutter.

Perhaps I ought to get rid of it.

Its not bad, but why the not-so-great? You fared pretty well in our little skirmish!

Compare with Luke Skywalker is what I'm thinking.

Ah, but Luke Skywalker is really not all that great. I shall summarise all his bad points:
a) he has an awful haircut
umm...

Oh yes
b) he's useless at countering use of the One Power

And I know it's possible because I once fought a Dark Jedi who had worked out how to repel moreo r less everything I could throw at him including Balefire, against which the One Power itself has no defence. I still killed him though - with a large sword while he was being distracted by some of my more ingenious weaves.
Perhaps, YK, your One Power-repelling skills will prove greater than Luke's, who is I believe still in a bacta tank after our last misunderstanding.

* seizes saidin and prepares to attack *

But then we're into fighting again. Perhaps we should get rid of the flood first before the house floats away.

* uses angreal to weave large amounts of Water in order to return the flood waters to where they came from. Begins to sweat. *

I think I need a bigger angreal. Hang on a sec.

* opens a gateway (with some effort) and Travels to Rhuidean to steal a decent sa'angreal *

I am under the impression that point B and the paragraph immediately following it contradict each other. [manages to twist the Force and the One Power, which are both the same thing*, closing the gateway.]

He can probably get back, though.

[*A rose by any other name will smell as sweet unless you call it stenchblossum. Um...]

*Grins, raises arms, and invokes the T'Kea, a power which he had peviously kept to himself*

*A green light envelops him, while shadows filt behind, giving him a poweful air*

Anyone care to mess with the great god L'Kha're?
(not me, I am just a messenger, shall we say...)

[Jar-Jar voice] Me-sa gotta bad fee'ing 'bout dis!

Last time I saw Jar-Jar Binks he feel victim to an unfortunate blast of Balefire which removed his tongue. I'd watch it if I were you.

And no, Tim, I don't want to mess with your God. He got a bit miffed with me last time we met and I don't really want to be digging up old feuds at this time of year. The autumn is the time for that, when you're looking for something to keep you warm during the winter.

And yes, I know it's the autumn where you are but it doesn't get cold in the New Zealand winter like it does here in lovely England.

Or does it?

[tenses, becomes unsure as to what he's tensing for, relaxes]

Oh, by the way, I did pick up that super-sa'angreal, or rather the ter'angreal which provides access to it. Because the sa'angreal itself is about the size of the Statue of Liberty it's a bit inconvinient to cart it about all the time.

* seizes saidin through the super-sa'angreal, stuggling with the vast amounts of the Power which almost force him over the brink... recovers and begins to weave Water to clear up the flood, and Fire and Air to warm things up again. And Spirit to help YK relax. *

I sense a great disturbance in the Force...

Oh, it's just that woven Spirit doohickey.

* returns from sailing trip and spends half an hour reading all the postings *

Um. Yes. So,MaW,what do ter'angreal look like?

little wizzy things or what?

Lets have a little light entertainment.

* jacculus' hair begins to photosynthesise gently.

Oo, yah.

Has anyone else noticed that as fish live in rivers, they always end up on the recieving end of all the crappy stuff coming out of factories, farms etc? I think they should have a voice! They should rise up!

* Scoops jelly beans and munches contentedly.

Oh yes, and by the way, does anyone know what it means (stares meaningfully at MaW,the repository of h2g2 knowledge) when you've submitted an article, and the edit link disappears from next to it and changes have been made, but it ain't in your approved list and you haven't got an email saying so-and-so bit sucks?

just asking...

What do you mean, the edit link disappears?

[looks at his own approved article, "The Penguin"]

Edit link's still there.