h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi there,

(still confused about Mr. T, but ignores it )

Gone a little quiet outside recently, but

*Hurriedly hitches up his towel and produces some tea bags*
Anyone for tea?
*Hurries indoors to make tea*

*Returns with several steaming mugs of tea, laden with sugar*
You see, Mr. T. is simply a figment of our collective imagination. He only exists if you want him to.
*A trenchcoat of voluminous proprtions appears, as if from nowhere, and wraps itself around him*
Ah, my faithful trenchcoat. Where have you been?
*He feeds it half the mug of tea, and it starts to get "hyper" off the massive amounts of sugar*
Woah, down boy!

What colour is the trenchcoat?

(you can tell a lot about a person by the colour of their trenchcoat... )

Usually it's black, because it listens to Radiohead a lot.
However, today it's decked out in fetching shades of lilac and bright green.
*reaches into the trenchcoat's voluminious depths. withdraws some stolen mustard sachets.*
Would you like some mustard from my condiment pocket? i'm
afraid i don't much care for mustard.

No, I don't like mustard much either.

* Reaches behind TimJ's ear and retrieves ten doughnuts and a small hare.Stares at the hare in confusion.

Hmmm. they must be running early today.

* Offers doughnuts round *

*takes several, feeds one to towel*
Is there naything left on the barbecue?
*Wanders over to take a look*

* Pulls staff from under cloak and waves it in the direction of the barbeque, which flares up, singeing Chrome101's fringe. Bows courteously.

Allow me to present my pet steak.

* Waves hand at patch of thin air near to ground.

*Delerious with hunger, he dives towards it*
WOW!
*Eats it,. Suddenly realises he has eaten thin ear. Burps*
Where is it?

HERE!!!

* Waves hand at patch of (apparent) air, which has now moved to another position.

Aarrgh!
*Suddenly realises he is a fool, in a fool's game, and other cliches to do with fools*

Indeed, I am a fool to be pitied!

*Enraged by starvation, picks up Jacculus and flings him onto the barbecue*

* sizzles gently

ahhhhhhh....nice.

puts on shades and leans back...

*Covers Jacculus in BBQ sauce*

Yeah baby! I'm gonna enjoy this

*Lip-synchs badly to Bruce Springsteen songs on his Sony Discman(TM)*

* Produces big knife and delves into own abdomen. Feels experimentally inside.

Hey! What's this?

* Pulls out stomach and proceeds to eat it. Only when it's half way down the oesophagus,realises there's something wrong here...

I'm not sure everyone in this thread realises that I'm Jim from RL. TimJ might not remember me, but Jacculus surely must...

RL?

Im not to sure I do remember you.....

Jog my memory...

Hmm interesting new name Chrome101!!!

Yes I do remember you.
*scratches head*

Here,have a grape

*proffers aforementioned fruiting body*