h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Phantom Polonius] You and I know that the Baron was planning to seal the portal to the Realm of the Dead in the basement. We must find the books and get the others to read the passages. That should stop the demon hordes. Then we need to find and kill the vampire. I think we have some control over objects in this reality, but not all corespond to objects in the real house. *gestures to Phantom Dining Room, that looks as it did in the past*

[Phantom Lycan] you think anyone can see us? we should have brought a necromancer...

*moves a bowl in the phantom dinging room*

[Phantom Polonius] Maybe Anthea or one of her apprentices will come.

*the other guests stop talking*

[Phantom Gentleman] Are you seriously looking for a necromancer?

[Phantom Polonius] Yes, we've had our bodies stolen by spirits.

[Phantom Gentleman] I'm not sure I follow, but if you're looking for a necromancer, you're certainly in the right place! *he gestures to the other guests* We are all necromancers here!

[Phantom Lycan]but we want one to help us get back to our bodies... can you do that?

<*coughcough*Alicia*cough>

[Phantom Gentleman] Possibly, it depends on the manner of possession. Did the spirit invade the body or did the body come in contact with an object belonging to the spirit? Such objects are called Fetters and may record the memories, personalities, and emotions of the living that remain after death. The former would require an exorcism, while the latter is the simple matter of destroying the fetter.

[Phantom Lycan] I think it was the fetter... how can I destroy the fetter like this? I mean I can't get at it

[Phantom Polonius] I have a plan. The fetter I touched was a small urn. If we can get someone to break it, then I will be free. Since I have seen how the Baron acts, I will pretend to be the Baron and force the secretary to reveal to me the location of the vampire. Then, I will burn the notebook, in one of the fireplaces maybe. What do you think?

[phantom Lycan] sounds like a plan..but how to get someone to break it?

[Phantom Polonius] We send a message. Lycan, do you have a knife on you? Carve a message into the table top where you know someone is sitting in the present.

*stabs the table with the knife reading "Lord Cumarnis smash the vase"*

*hears a scratching on table in front of him*

*puts his hands onto the carved area and feels the engraved message*

Which vase?

*not sure if whatever the thing who wrote it heard him, carves the same message into the table below the first one*

*the scratching comes below*

"the one polonius touched before before he changed"

*Curmanis feels the new carving, and sits back in his chair thinking*

You guys stay here, and make sure Lycan's body doesn't leave the room.

*heads to the hallway, where he first found Polonius acting unusual*

*Cyiadan walks right up to the phantom Lycan and Polonius where they are sat and touches Lycan on the shoulder*

How did you get here?

*looks shocked* you can see us?

<>

[Phantom Polonius] Our bodies have been stolen by displaced spirits. Their deaths must have been so horrible and sudden that their memories have caught their spirits in a loop attempting to explain their demise.

Of course I can see you silly, but what are all these people doing here...I don't understand