h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*NYC lies on the floor, staring at the ceiling, hoping somebody will come and peel him off the floor*

..luck just isn't on my side...

*NYC gives up waiting, and searches his pockets for his cot*

*and remembers his cot was destroyed in the old initiation chamber by Zeb's can of whupass*

aww...

*NYC searches for his chloroform*

*looks over at NYC*
are you okay?
*helps him up*
no more tranquilizing Jonny, okay? my bodyguards seem to enjoy beating you up...
*winks at the clones*

*cough*

I don't ever remember signing up for this...

*NYC crosses over to the couch, and lies down*

*looks slightly irritated at the loss of her couch, but conjures a new one instead of taking NYC's*

*NYC takes out his cell phone and orders out for pizza, charging it to Afgncaap5's account. He gets up to get the pizza, only to have jonny jump up and eat it all, and Sea take his couch*

*looks very contented on the couch, petting jonny, who falls asleep almost immediately after finishing the pizza*

no no no no no no no.....

*NYC pulls out his half-demolished cot from his coat, and sits on it*

*feels a little bad for NYC and his cot, so she fixes it for him*

thanks, I guess...

*NYC lies down in his cot, with machine guns akimbo, if Affy decides to pop his face in any time soon*

*BOOKMARK*

*Continuity note-you keep saying that you're at CLI. You aren't. You are in Afgncaap5's Holistic Detective Agency. And now, I need to rationally explain what those creatures are doing in a detective genre setting. Erm, lemme think...okay, they are actually all from a series of tests that Affy did a while back at CLI, involving the interbreeding of Tribbles, aligators, Minx, and bloodworms. He stored them under the agency in the event that he ever wanted to unleash a tide of little monsters on h2g2, but decided not too. All of them have a controlling chip in them, but Jonny's could easily be removed. I think that'll work, especially if you go over to The Krylma Leader's page soon to have it taken out*

*grins*
whoops... glad that was taken care of...

do I smell affy?

*NYC opens fire, shooting everything in the office at least 17 times, and quits when he realizes that (1) affy isn't really there, and (2) it might wake up jonny*

*jonny is still asleep, amazingly enough*

*NYC decides to go to sleep as well... everything looked messed up enough*

*zzzZZZZzzzzz....*

*Affy checks the security monitor on his watch*

Okay, Jonny and NYC are asleep.

*Pulls out his spellbook from whenever he's in a fantasy-genre story. Affy looks over a certain spell, puts up the spell book, and grins*

Let's see. I've got Jonny, NYC, SEA, and the clones to worry about. I think I can handle that with this spell.

EXEX!

*Affy zooms in from several miles away. Zipping faster than the eye can see, and shielding his future movements from any who may try to track him with the force thanks to his handy mind shield that he never takes down, Affy zooms from character to character, takes all of their weapons, and tosses them into the pit, where the little monsters below chew them to peices. Then, Affy herds the confused villains into a cell, and locks it, just before the Exex spell wears off. Affy sits down on the floor, panting*

Sorry about switching genres, guys, but with the other heroes not responding to messages, desperate measures had to be taken.

*Notices that Jonny is still sleeping. Wonders what kind of tranquilizers were being used*

*looks really surprised*
wow, affy... that was pretty good. i'd be impressed if i couldn't do this...
*turns into a puddle and slides out of the cell, then rematerializes*
but as for the others... they may be stuck since i don't have the keys to the cell.

*NYC wakes up*

aww... crap. I shouldn't have gone to sleep...

oh well.. nothing much is happening... I might as well go back to sleep...

*NYC looks to find his cot on the other side of the cell*

crap.

*teleports the cot into the cell*
wait a minute... i can teleport.
*teleports into the cell*
well that's no good...
*teleports out again*
not worth it... and at least now i have the couch to myself...