h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Which one?

The stomach pump... ~grin~

If I didn't know any better Greebs, I would say you were enjoying this.

I'll hold her legs...

LOL. And here I thought my stomach pumping days were over. I think Greeb's should be on the receiving end.

*holds Alicat's legs*

Hang on, which end are we sticking the tube in again?

Uh, oh. LOL.

What? The stomach pump?

*Looks concerned*

Well, someone will have to sit on Alicat and then get ready to grab the lettuce leaf when it comes out...

*Any volunteers???*

I'll grab the leaf if no-one else wants to.

*puts on really think rubber gloves*

Menza... me is surprised at you... just because those rubber gloves are not as educated as you... you should not go round calling them names....

Sorry Greebs. And sorry gloves.

*passes box of doughnuts*

What do we do if the leaf starts morphing into somebody else? my preferred option would be to run to another forum, but then i twend to be a bit chicken when it comes to evil extra-terrestial life!!
Hold on alicat, it'll all be over soon!

Hey there Greebs, I brought you a present since I'm a new guest - it's some smoked Baltic herring - but it looks like you're awfully busy here...

*holds out box with red satin ribbon around it *

I don't thing Greebo is ever too busy for food - especially doughnuts!

Or a glass of milk.

But don't forget the straw!

Ok, ok. You hold her legs and arms and I'll intibate her. I've seen nearly every episode of ER, so getting the tube down her throat should be a snap. Menza, are you ready to grab the leaf? Ok, then! Let's do it!!

*Alicat is sat upon by various friends and well wishers. Mari-rae threads a long black tube down her throat while Gwennie begins pumping the bicycle pump the tube is attached to. Ali's stomach begins to expand, then contract. Expand, and contract. A sound is heard. It is a growly, groaning kind of gurgling sound. Then Alicat's eyes get very big and her skin turns very green. The lettuce leaf comes up out of her stomach along with a lot more stuff nobody ever wanted to see again. The spew hits everyone, including the poor newbie. Soon we all are heaving up our guts all over Greebo's backyard. The scene is horrific. We are all covered in vomit and it just keeps coming. In the end there is just one question on everyone's mind... Did Menza catch the alien lettuce leaf?*

Ummm, Sorry I was indisposed, I was throwing up in this shrub.

Geez, when I decided to come to this party I was so NOT prepared for all this vomit. Anybody have any spare clothes or do I have to go all the way back home to change? Do you guys do this a LOT?

*looks down at herself, stunned *

Sorry, I'll go get the hose.