h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The groombots took the horses back to the stables when we packed up the camp. We left them in good hands, Lil.

So do we approach the mine entrance now we are all together?

*looks at the carpet*

How are we going to get that through the tunnels with Amos on it?

*gets her carameliser at the ready, with the maglight attached*

It's a basic "convoy through camel's eye" plan. Make sure that the carpet is roughly in the middle of us all, with some people watching the rear and other's looking ahead, with a few people on either side of it in the event that the tunnel opens up a bit. It'd make it harder to take a frontal assault this way, but it's the only decent way to protect considerable cargo in caves and mountain passes.

*Affy draws his sword and checks the danger level*

Okay, we're definitely in enemy territory, but there's no immediate danger....either we've not been spotted, or we've not been established as worthwhile.

*attaches a luminescent squid to her stetson and to both ends of the carpet*

Okay, from here, there is sparse cover to the area under that balcony, so we'll have to go singly from rock to rock. Keep your heads down when you're in the open. We'll meet up again under the balcony and then figure out a way to get up there.

Better get this horse in sea's pocket then.

*Leads Toby over to the pocket, unzips the pocket and motions to the horse to get in. The horse gives Gord an "are you crazy?" look and snorts.*

Er, anyone got any ideas?

You're trying to get a horse into that zipper? Look, Gord, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink. Ergo, we might be able to get the horse into the pocket if it thinks that there's water in there.

~dishembodied gales of laughter~

~shouts~

There's better things than water in here Affy

*Toby hears his Masters voice, give Affy a sideways "here goes nothing" glance then jumps neatly into the pocket*

*there is a crash and a couple of wails from inside the pocket*

~dishembodied voish~

He broke the pee-pee bottle! Ewwwwwwww!

~disembodied screech~

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? WHAT'S A HORSE DOING IN HERE? WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

I've got the feeling that we're going to almost sneak past undetected, but be noticed due to the disembodied voices.

But it's not a feeling that I think'll come true. More of an "wouldn't it be ironic if" feeling. And those normally don't come true.

*Amos suddenly sits up, slides his legs off the side of the carpet and slips to the ground, where he stretches luxuriously and then looks around*

*it is hard to see where he is looking, because he is completely covered in orchids, like a very expensive parade float*


Thanks for not leaving us behind.


*the carpet fastens around his neck like a cape*

*up at the crater rim, the rat-ants are checking out the environs, acid pistols at the ready*

Houston, we have Locutus....

Roger, I copy that you have Locutus, what do you plan to do with him?

Amos??

Oh dear

Oh! He's been assimilated by the Borchids!

This can't possibly be good.

Borchids....that's a good one, WM.

*Wistfully thinks back to the Esirpretne's maiden voyage when they had to fight the Bjorg*

If Amos is awake again, it means that everything he's seeing and hearing is definitely going to betransmitted to anyone else connected to this skin. It'll probably be a lot more than just the vague feelings that we're sending towards each other whenever any of us get orchids due to how many that he has.

We need to get through these tunnels quickly.

Agreed