h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Since the other one went so fast...

I have here a lovely book (if headache-inducing, because it's written in Fraktur.) A 19th-Century German book on manners and running a high-society household - it even includes the handy tip that young men should not always say "trichinenhaft" ("trichina-esque", meaning "wormlike". It must've been the equivalent of back then, or something )

At one point, it describes spreading mustard on the soles of someone's feet and putting them in a freshly-dug hole up to their chin, then rubbing their face with warm vinegar.

Under which circumstances is it appropriate to do this?



Klaxons will be awarded where necessary...

When suffering from fever?

As a hiccup cure?

No - the poor person in the hole isn't running a fever, at least.

But I looked it up for you - for fever, it recommends drinking ozonated water, though regrettably few doctors know of its many good qualities...

(Interesting, but unrelated fact: many German health resorts were built in the 19th century in areas where the ozone concentration is particularly high. They'd realised it kills bacteria, and thus, must be healthy. )

Interesting, but no. I will see whether it has a hiccup cure...

When they wanted to pickle someone(a bit like the mellified man) and had run out of cucumbers.

Fevers and rheumatism came into my head because the process reminded me of some old sweathouses found near me. They were basically little stone huts, where people suffering from rheumatic pains were put. There was a fire, lots of steam like a sauna, and they were also fed magic mushrooms - although it's not sure whether that was part of the cure, or done recreationally.

A cure for warts?

mini

Hmm, mustard seed is known to help with the digestive system, and if the title is a hint, maybe it was some sort of 'cure' for people who had farted in public?

Oh dear, both "burial" and "rheumatism" were klaxoned...

There's no cure for hiccups, as such, that I can find.

(Though it does have a cure for rheumatism: simply rub the affected limbs with formic acid, diluted with alcohol - also useful against vomiting, if you soak a piece of paper in the mixture and lay it on the abdomen of the afflicted. Otherwise, use opium for an upset stomach )

Also not warts - no cure to be found for those, oddly.

I like "farting in public", but it's nothing to do with that, nor the digestive system in general

My guess was motivated by an observation by Hobbes (from Calvin and Hobbes): "I think most hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends."

(from 'The Revenge of the Baby-Sat')

Is it a marinade?

B

A cure for, er, tonsilitis?

Marinade?

A cure for bedwetting?

mini

in growing toe nails

athletes foot

corns

varacose veins

migrane

typhoid
and
dyptheria

dont forgret to add finest brown paper

is this book the equivelent of mrs beatons book for keeping house

Oooh, two more s on "corns" and "migraine/headache"!

None of those.

But there is a cure for corns mentioned: a tincture of three parts pitch, three parts galbanum, and one part sal ammoniac (ammonium chloride) dissolved in vinegar.

Headaches, sniff a bottle of wine vinegar.

I was just dozing off when my subconscious rudely woke me up with an idea - so I'd better get it down before I forget.

Smoking Jacket of Distinguished Rumination and iron-clad klaxon safety helmet..

Does the feted book mention extracting them from the hole? (I.e how long long were they supposed to remain half-buried?)

Soles of feet covered in mustard - was this supposed to 'well' up through the body?

Was it based on the idea of like symptoms to cure like ailments?

I'm think mustard, vinegar pretty potent if inhaled likely to produce a round of coughing - so was the problem respiratory or speculating on the humours was it an excess or lack of catarrh / mucus? or something related to either of those?

No, sorry.

Interestingly, no mention is made of when to pull him back out of the hole.

It's not to cure a cough - though I think they certainly wouldn't mind him coughing.

Mustard *is* involved in their cough cure - a white roll boiled in camomile tea, sprinkled with mustard powder, and applied to the chest.

(Who ever said he was ill, anyway? )