h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*tuc bangs a hard as he can with the rake on top of the mogrel*

*Busterbone leaves controls to open secret hatch to allow tuc to enter MongrelMechas head*

Quick Tuc get in!

*Realises that the Mecha was just about to step on UH, rushes back to the controls*

Uh,oh.

*UH is gone!! Disappeared into thin sand*

*tuc scrambles in trying not to step on anything. He accendently knocks a red lever *

OOpps

*Wipes at his rearview mirror, trying to clear the black and silver that is filling it. The black and silver doesn't go away. Turns around to look, just in time to see a big black foot descending toward UH. Waves his hands.*

STOP, STOP!

*Without his hands on the handlebars, the motorcycle does an abrupt turn, throwing BBW off and stalling.*

Goshdarnit Tuc that red lever was the completely-unnecessary-but-always-present-send-the-giant-robot-monster-crazy lever.

*pushes lots of buttons*

Nope, completely out of control. You know if I was a crazy robot monster with 2 dawgz in its skull cavity the first thing I would do is fill the skull cavity with deadly poison gas.

*a small hissing flatulent noise is heard*

Tuc, was that you?? Please tell me that was you!

*the door opens. sea's roommate looks in. she looks concerned to find sea curled up in the fetal position, then realizes sea is laughing so hard she's making no sound. sea's roommate rolls her eyes and leaves*

OOC

Score!

Sorry

*Krans extracts himself from the sand castle runs away. Pretty soon all anyone can see of him is a cloud of dust in the distance.*

*A few minutes later, the cloud of dust is seen returning, and resolves itself to be Krans, carrying a bone that is almost twice the size of him. It is ticking.*

OOC - LOL

*Picks himself up out of the sand and runs over to his motorcycle. He kick-starts it and then just sits there.*


Do I deal with the run-away robot or do I continue with the mission. Robot or mission. Robot or mission. *sniff* Robot or ...*sniff* Ro... *SNIFFFFFFFF*


Hey! Would you look at that bone!

*The tip of the hovercraft snags on an absurdly large starfish, flipping the craft onto its nose. the occupants are thrown from the vehicle just as it roll s onto its side. It lands at an awkward angle, pressing precisely the wrong button. The afterburners kick in, launching the vehicle out among the dunes,on a curve that takes it directly toward the mongrel!*

Oh, my. That's rather full of jet fuel. What's this sticking out of my arm? Oh, just a bone. I suppose I'll be stuck here for a while. Or perhaps...

Starfish! come, help me.

*the starfish scuttles over at a meter per second. Arty rolls onto it, arranging his compound fracture so that it doesn't stab anything.*

To the action!

*Arty is dragged along at an agonizingly slow pace, and attempts to twiddle his thumbs in boredom.*

Ow!

Who's carrying me?

*Saturn Girl takes the opportunity presented by the distraction by the huge mutt to grab Arl, and drag him to safty. This time such she grabbed the real arl, not some dummy.*

hands arty a morphine tablet and an arm splint.
digs U.H. out of the sand. eeww! what a mess. Quick, somebody call a .
phases into the robot control room with 2 gas masks.

*Krans approaches the mongrel as near as he dares, and then lobs the still-ticking bone in that direction and starts running.*

FIRE IN THE HOLE!

*grabs gas mask from Rambling, hands other mask to Tuc*

Ta, rambling

*opens emergency exit hatch on top of Mongrel Mechas head and ascends ladder*

Quick Tuc, this way. Its our only chance!!

*Hears the distant shout of "Fire in the Hole" from Krans and sees a ticking Time Bone descend from the sky, enter the escape hatch and go clattering down the ladder*

Um..........Tuc, its for you!!

*leaps out of escape hatch, jumps off the head of Mongrel Mecha using a nearby bikini clad bombshell goddess to break his fall*

Oof. Sorry about that Saturn Girl

*he says as he sits on a flattened and comatose Saturn Girl*

Hey, this sack of yours is moving!! Well Arl be hornswoggled, its Arl

*takes sack and runs in general direction of The-Land-where-An-Extremely-Angry-Saturn-Girl-Isn't. Takes one last forlorn look at bikini clad figure*

I likes them when they run and I likes them when they just lay there too. But a Dawgz gotta do what a Dawgz gotta do. And this Dawg gotta run as fast as he can before Saturn Girl wakes up.

*goes back to pick up bone and scrables out of the robot, Once out in the open realises bone is ticking throws it away in a panic in lands near saturn girl*

Oppps

*lies on the floor, coughing up sand. then he removes from his pocket a a little plastic bag. he takes a bottle of water from his other pocket and pours it over the bag, which happens to contain a just-add-water hot-rod, replete with fire-gushing engine. He climbs in and depresses the accelerator. As he speeds past he grabs the running BB and arl*