h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Kes comes out from under the table*
Hey - V - look at your shoes - you can see your face in that shine ... weren't they suede shoes?

funny. very funny.* Valis's psyhcokenetic blocker somehow disengaged throughout the whole ordeal.* Just because I'm no longer in the room, people think I can't hear them.

* the Spelling Gods unleash a stroke of lightning.*

Nah, it came out because of the liquid hitting the floor when the IIEM overflowed. Val would have been OK if he had run.

When one has coffee on the mind, retreat is not an option.

He who turns and runs away
Lives to drink another day.

Thou who turns the other way, may miss out and be lead astray.

*storms into the Cafe with mayhem on her mind...*



Right. Where's that bot got to?

*strides out looking stern*
Bot? We have a score to settle. Front and center, now!

*the bot does not respond*

Oho. ls that the game you're playing, boyo? Fine then.
llEM? Three latte cups full of nothing but honey, please...
*

*rolls the shutters back between the porch and the main area*

If you lot have any sense, you'll join me on the other side of this screen. Believe me, whatever else happens, everything in the cafe will be clean when it's over.

*grabs the tray of donuts and pot of coffee and heads through the access way onto the porch where she has a good view of the action through the screens.

*pokes his head back in, wondering what O has planned*

*grins at Valis in a devil-may-care way*

l plan nothing. That's the secret.

*grins impishly and dumps the honey all over the counter area and floor. Proceeds to dance a jig in the sticky puddle*

Bot! Meet your match.

*looks on, dumbfounded*

*closet door opens and the bot rolls out with an ominous low hum*
*sensors sweep the room as if in disbelief and settle in the direction of Odra*
*bot rolls forward to within range of honey on floor*
*a long squeegee mop suddenly shoot out parallel to the floor and sweeps Odra at ankle level, knocking her feet out from under her*

*bot then begins to mop up honey*

*collapses heavily as bot knocks her to ground. Springs up again, coated in honey. Finds the sticky substance gives her excellent, gecko-like traction. Laughs maniacally, seizes the tea tray, and stacks it with crockery, and begins to climb the wall. Leaps from thence into the rafters, just above bot. Begins shelling it, the floor, and everything else with cups and saucers*

*Kes stirs from a tea-induced reverie, looks up at the scene.*
Ulp!
*He takes a running dive through to the other side of the screen, landing in a heap - fortunately of old newspapers.*

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

*bot retracts squeegee mop, backs up two feet, then suddenly extends fanblade duster attachment, neatly snagging one of the belt loops on Odra's jeans*

*moves backward briskly another 3 feet, pulling Odra off rafter and leaving her dangling 8 feet high*

ZZZZZZZT. ZZZZZZZZZZT.

Extends shop vacuum attachment and begins attending to broken crockery*

*walks in*
Hello all! ???
*quickly ducks behind a table*
I think I'll watch from a distance.

Hey Valis! Que paso! Are those new clothes, or just freshly pressed?

*pokes his head in again, not sure if the situation is resolving itself, or feeding fire with fire.*

This is a good one! Who is everyone betting on? Odra or the bot? I'd say it's even odds.

*jr(having struggled back to g2 reality)comes to his senses (altho seeming to remember somthing about Odra and honey and stuff) follows other less heroic patrons*

*er, um, ah, prudent patrons*

*or less impulsive patrons*

*or, uh, less adventurous patrons**yeah, that's the ticket*