h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Especially for the slow connection tonight.

Slow? I don't know what you're talking about, I reckon 10 minutes per page is quite good going compared to normal
The saddest thing is I'm considering swopping to surftime so I can get rid of the annoying woman who cuts me off at random times.Just think, even more access to BT

I'd never get to work in the morning if I had surftime

I never get anywhere on time anyway. I have so far attended six of my night class courses and have been late every time...after the third week the teacher actually asked me if he needed to make allowances for my own time system

I always get shouted at for being late, so I try not to be now.

Does it work? Generally lateness seems to be a pre-dispositon and it's quite hard to change...at least that's my excuse

You could just say that the rest of the world is early.

Well clearly the rest of the world is wrong as my time system is obviously more effective as it always gets me to the right place at the right time

Perhaps we could tell them to slow down a bit.

Well all the rushing about is a bit unnecessary...especially when I happen to know that if you're late often enough it becomes expected so you never have to rush ever

Just so long as you don't slowly become later.

I generally have a fiteen minute allowance...the latest I've ever been was about 9 hours and that was months ago, recently it's been about 30minutes so if anything I'm punctual now

Last time I was 9 hours late, it was cos the train broke down.

Oh see now that's a valid reason, I just got distracted on the way to meet a friend and kind of turned up slightly later than planned...to my credit it was still on the same day though

Well done.

I think I was more impressed than my mate though

I can imagine.

Well it should be expected

Can I just say that I'm not sure what the MOST evil thing in the world is but I reckon it'll do well to see off Celine Dion.

That'd be BT then