A Conversation for Blue midget
Aboard the Midget
[...] Started conversation Apr 13, 2003
*Kryten sits down on pilot's seat and waits next to RD Comm.*
Aboard the Midget
Mort - a middle aged Girl Interrupted Posted Apr 13, 2003
Krytie get your butt back on thge bridge now, we need you up there, you are not sacrificing yourself for us, (but thanks for the offer) we need you to do the cleaning, do you think we can stand to be living here with that dirty smegger listrette socks without you washing them????
*heads off back to bridge picking up a bar of 
on the way from her cabin for breakfast>
Aboard the Midget
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Apr 13, 2003
*the midget powers up by remote control*
Aboard the Midget
Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian Posted Apr 13, 2003
*colonel comes aboard and launches* Now I just have to get in range...*steers towards asteroid at top speed*
Aboard the Midget
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Apr 13, 2003
Hurry colonel, the Red dwarf has ignited, 10 mins to impact!
oh and could you look for a peice of blue tac somewere in there?
Aboard the Midget
Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian Posted Apr 13, 2003
*stops BM 12km away from asteroid, gets out, loads and targets* 10 Km away *colonel fires*
Aboard the Midget
Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian Posted Apr 13, 2003
*rocket lances away at the asteroid and detonates on the asteroid. the space around the asteroid goes all funny before exploding* Target vaporized Sir. Permisson to come back aboard.
Aboard the Midget
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Apr 13, 2003
permission granted, good work, and did you see any blue tac in there, it belongs to me you see
Aboard the Midget
Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian Posted Apr 13, 2003
I'll look sir but I might of accidentaly flushed it out with the air Sir.
*colonel gets back in, and goes back to hanger (looking for blue tac)*
Aboard the Midget
Bob (aka Skutter 1) - Back from his hols and ready for SMEG Posted Apr 19, 2003
*Scutter 1 (mod) enters*
*No-one notices*
*Powers up Blue Midget*
*Opens Hangar Bay doors*
*
Launches Blue Midget and heads 
off to a safe distance until the outcome of the Auto Destruct fiasco has been resolved.*
Aboard the Midget
Bob (aka Skutter 1) - Back from his hols and ready for SMEG Posted Apr 19, 2003
Missed a whole page of backlog. 
Must have been the after effects of that bl***y Munchkin Song.
Thought we were about to explode so did a ner. 
*Pilots Blue Midget back to Main Hangar. Powers down.*
*Exits*
Aboard the Midget
[...] Posted Jun 8, 2003
*steps aboard the Midget and sits down in cockpit..
Sees skutter 2 carooming past*
Hey get up here you poor excuse for a dustpan!
*skutter 2 drives through the doorway...*
Good. Now Holly... lock the Midget's door, start up the retros and open hangar doors please
HOLLY: Why?
No reason... just... testing Blue midget..
HOLLY: You're running away ain'tcha?
No you stupid bald git... now just open the hangar doors...
HOLLY: Oh that's charming innit? Running out on yer friends...
Holly you're mistaken.
HOLLY: How's that then?
They're not my friends... they're a bunch of idiots...
HOLLY: See perfect company.
Oh hah hah.. just open the doors, holly.. all I want is a little back-up until this uno problemo is sorted out OK? Now open the doors...
HOLLY: Yes Arnold...
*doors open*
Now Holly.. do we have some kind of gravity drive that can magnetise things to the ship?
HOLLY: We've got something like that, yes.
We activate it or something... Now you. *points to Skutter 2*
Put down the landing struts of the Midget and slowly head out of the Hangar doors...
*Midgets staggers towards doors and out into space*
Now move 'round till we're able to get the Midgets to stand on the Dwarf...
*Midget crashes onto the top hull of Red Dwarf*
I hate skutters... now lower the legs..
*legs lower... Blue Midget is now positioned on top of red dwarf at a diagonal slant*
Ticketyboo... Now just to wait until the big slobbering Morph mess is over with...
Err where d'you think you're going? *to skutter slowly exiting cockpit*
*Rimmer points to a copy of Fascist Dictator monthly*
Turn the page.
*skutter turns the page*
Right.. *relaxes against chair* Now go and get some Sonsair from supplies .. *skutter moves off* MUSIC. *Music plays from Comm. 'Reggie Hammond plays Christian Rock Morris Dancer music'*
*Begins to read... takes the glass of sonsair from skutter 2*
*stops and looks out the window at the red metallic surface beneath the Midget.. smile appears on face as pictures listerette being devoured by PolyMorph...*
Aaah... The world loves a B-----d..!
Aboard the Midget
Existential Elevator Posted Jun 9, 2003
Yes.
Now....
Where is the Blue midget control core so I can get you down from there.....
Aboard the Midget
Existential Elevator Posted Jun 9, 2003
There's absolutely no override<?>
.....we'll soon see about that....
Key: Complain about this post
Aboard the Midget
- 1: [...] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 2: Mort - a middle aged Girl Interrupted (Apr 13, 2003)
- 3: [...] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 4: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 5: Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian (Apr 13, 2003)
- 6: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 7: Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian (Apr 13, 2003)
- 8: Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian (Apr 13, 2003)
- 9: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 10: Commander Xerxes Thamian Meridian (Apr 13, 2003)
- 11: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Apr 13, 2003)
- 12: Bob (aka Skutter 1) - Back from his hols and ready for SMEG (Apr 19, 2003)
- 13: [...] (Apr 19, 2003)
- 14: Bob (aka Skutter 1) - Back from his hols and ready for SMEG (Apr 19, 2003)
- 15: [...] (Jun 8, 2003)
- 16: Existential Elevator (Jun 9, 2003)
- 17: [...] (Jun 9, 2003)
- 18: Existential Elevator (Jun 9, 2003)
- 19: [...] (Jun 9, 2003)
- 20: Existential Elevator (Jun 9, 2003)
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