h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Just remembered a point i was going to say. Surely if you let your child know (or let them guess) that Santa didn't exist, then they'd go and tell the other kids and it would spoil it for them.
J

Possibly.

I'd try to get them to keep it secret, to be honest. Like I say - being clever is NOT the way to be popular, and that's a lesson kids need to be taught, rather than having to learn the hard way.

Then again, if my kid gets a reputation as a relentless shatterer of illusions and teller of unpalatable truths - GOOD.

H.

Oh *that* Shawn the sheep! Honestly, someone else on h2g2 went 'baaaaa - shawn the sheep' when I told him my name and I thought

I've even seen that film! What a pathetic memory I have. Good thing I don't have to take exams and can live here in gorgeously sunny and hot Sevilla instead!

I'm assuming that Jemima and Clare are *your* real names.

azaharita

hola Hoo,

<>

This is the kid you are never going to have, right? Yet you used the first conditional which is meant for very probable or likely to happen future events. Freudian slip?

You know what a Freudian slip is - when you say one thing and mean your mother.

az

'when you say one thing and mean your mother'
'I'd rather marry a duck billed platypus' and all that . As far as I'm aware my name really is Clare and die Ente's really is Jemima (what's Spanish for duck by the way? I only know the German ).

Do you have a 'real' name as well Hoo? Is it Shawn as well?

p.s that's ClarPARE Canarde, the 'arp' bit being the infix (you know, like a prefix only in the middle )

Duck in Spanish is pato. Duckie would loosely translate as patito.

I don't know Hoo's real name either, but I call him Wee Jimmie (longish story). That *would* be really weird if his name was Shawn too. And just as weird if it turns out to be James!

Hey - why aren't you studying!!!

az

Why aren't I studying Az? Coz I'm just too bleeding lazy, that's why!
Anyway, tomorrow I've got Latin (which I can bluff through, and anyway I've left my books at school) and Maths, which I'm going to fail whether I revise or not! So at the moment I'm eating, drinking and making merry...

So, are you fluent in Spanish then? That must be really cool! Do you ever think in Spanish? I started thinking in German a bit when I was on Exchange there, but I don't know enough to think anything very deep!

Clarita,

I've lived in Spain for 11 years and - considering that - my Spanish is totally crap. I came here not knowing a word of Spanish, have never taken a course (no money), spend most days teaching English so am obviously not speaking Spanish during the day. So all the Spanish I know has mostly been learned by just picking it up. Quite fluent, I think. Can understand much better than I can speak (my accent is apparently quite amusing).

Over the years I've bought several course books and workbooks in order to teach myself Spanish at home. Too bad I couldn't have also bought some self-discipline! Anyhow, it isn't all that dire. I can communicate very well. It's just when I might want to say something like - 'Well, if you had called me earlier then I might have been able to meet you.' (third conditional). That sort of thing just never trips lightly off my tongue in Spanish. Also this language is loaded with subjunctive tenses for, basically , unreal situations. English doesn't even have subjunctive tenses - we just say things like - 'if I were you . . .' And the Spanish verbs! 17 conjugations for each and every f**king verb! Yikes. Spanish kids are *still* studying verbs when they are 16-17 years old in school. And also the use of the reflexsive 'se'. Won't even touch that one here.

Anyhow, I hear that German is way harder to learn than Spanish - what are ya? some kinda masochist?

But yes, I do think in Spanish. I never translate in my mind what I say - I just use the words I know. Actually have massive Spanish vocabulary, just can't do the verb thing well enough yet. But I make many people laugh, so . . .

Oh, have I rambled on enough here? I think so.

hasta soon,
az

"Do you have a 'real' name as well Hoo? "

Yes.

H.

holitas Hoo

Totally expected response from you.

Have you ever told anyone on h2g2 your real name? Heck, I know what you and your lovely wife look like. (for the benefit of others - a very attractive couple!). So what's the thing about not saying what your real name is? Unless of course it's Dwayne.

G'wan, you can tell us. Though you will always be 'wee jimmie' to me.

kissitos,
az
otherwise known as shawn the sheep.

F38024?thread=252116&post=3462452#p3462452

F35246?thread=202933&post=2289504#p2289504

There's two who know me - one who "met" me on here, and who only met me for real when the other half and I went to her birthday party... the other who knew me when I was EIGHT () and only realised she knew me when I gave her some clues.

One to others know my real name, but they don't use it. I've grown to quite like "Hoo". Go figure.

H.

Go figure indeed. Your real name doesn't appear in either of those threads. Isn't Ben lovely? I like her a lot.

Anyhow, I digress. What is it - you want to remain mysteriously Hoovooloo? Or your real name is, in fact, Dwayne?

ho hum,

az

I bet it is Dwayne, or Keith. Trismagistus perhaps?

,
I chose German because I was already doing French and Latin and wanted to try a non Romance language. I soon regretted my mistake. German irregular verbs have made me at least twice, with their heart-breaking arbitrary vowel changes. Example, the verb 'lassen', to let, changes to 'liess' in the präteritum (roughly equivlalent to the imperfect, but normally only used in formal writing), while 'lesen', to read, changes to 'las'. And these are two of the more regular examples, add sein (war), wissen (wusste) and ziehen( zog) and 75 more in common usage that we have to know (and masses of other obscure ones) and you begin to wonder whether life is actually worth living at all, at least until after the exam *sigh*. And don't get me started on adjective endings...

It's worth it though, if you hear German spoken. It's a really beautiful language, much more than most people think. It's a fascinating (well, to me anyway!) mixture of really obvious (compound words can be formed just by sticking one word on another; Sailor = Seemann lit. sea man , and my favorite 'auspuff', meaning (car) exhaust ) and words that are completely unrelated to their English equivalents (eg Erdbeeren = strawberries, Friede = peace, Krieg = war).

Then there are words which at first look completely different to the English, but if you think about are actually related to other English words. Gesundheit = health, 'gesund' is probably related to 'sound', as in the health meaning of 'sound as a bell' etc. The '-heit' suffix is like our '-hood', as in knighthood and priesthood.

Then there are German words with latin roots but (and here's the exciting bit ) *different* latin roots to the English. Example: eng. 'competitive' = lat. 'cum' (with) + lat. 'peto' (I search for, make for, attack). German 'konkurrierend I *think* comes from again lat. 'cum' + 'curro' (I run). Now isn't that cool?

It happens in French as well. In English you cannot foretell what an unpredictable person will do (dico, I say), while in French you can't forsee the actions of a person 'imprevisible' (video, I see). Stop ing, you at the back!

Oh dear ! I think I need one of Hoo's smileys.

"Trismagistus perhaps?"

You flatter me young lady (although the pedant in me cannot be restrained from pointing out that it's TrismEgistus... sorry)

In the words of Slartibartfast, 'my name is... not important.'

"I think I need one of Hoo's smileys."

I *like* it when people get on their hobbyhorse about things - usually. Because if it really IS a hobbyhorse, they usually actually know their stuff (as you clearly do) and the rant is interesting and informative.

It's when people start on about things they've got no idea about at all that I start to get a bit testy.

So - do go on!

H.

hey hoodeldeedoo,

(like the new subject heading!)

If your name wasn't important then you wouldn't be being so precious about it. Kevin? Anyhow, you have my email - you could tell me there and you KNOW I'd never tell anyone else (hot needles in my eyes - remember?) Never mind, I'll just ask Ben! haahahhahhaaaa.

az

hi Clare,

Wow, you made me dizzy with all that German grammar stuff - adjective endings??? Actually, English used to have adjective endings too, but thankfully we gave that up. Well, you have proved without a doubt that you are indeed a masochist . I can't say I share your opinion that the German language sounds pleasant. It always reminds me of movie Nazis and Hogan's Heroes. Stupid I know, but it's such a harsh sounding language to me.

But you're right - if you are already studying Latin and French then German would definitely be more of a challenge. If you ever came to Spain you'd probably be fluent in two days and then I would have to hate you forever.

I studied French in school but WAY BACK THEN the French courses were crap and all we did was conjugate verbs and parrot sentences. Most of my French vocabulary comes from the fact that in Canada all items you buy there have to have both English and French on them, hence, lots of vocab. And I can actually understand French quite well. Just can't speak it at all. Went to see a French film awhile ago - Amelie - shown here in original version with Spanish subtitles. And most of the time I didn't need to read the subtitles to understand what they were saying.

I have one student now - she's about 24 and is studying economics. Wants to improve her English. She is also fluent in French. And the funny thing is she speaks English with a French accent! Not only that but half the time she mixes up her languages and keeps speaking French to me. So then I have to slap her about the head and tell her to knock it off. It ain't easy teaching English!

What's happened to Duckie? Patito Jem.

Anyhow, if you are reading this now you shouldn't be - you should be studying!

hasta soon,
az

Ich glaube, dass die Ente für die Prüfungen lernt - armes Entchen! .

Wow! You live in Canada too?. I prefer French too German in some ways - it's easier, and the pronunciation is less similar to English, and I like all the graves and acutes and cedillas, they look so pretty! For order and purity of grammar and all that I reckon Latin is streets ahead of the other languages I learn, but it takes so long to work out how to say anything, trying to remember all the rules. I also do Greek and Hebrew (yeah, I dunno why either, it all seemed to make some kind of sense at the time), and I want to learn esperanto, after exams maybe.

Ok, Trismegistus, but PLEASE don't call me 'young lady'; you know my real name, and 'young lady' sounds a bit patronising. Well I don't call you old man anyway!

Clarita,

No, I don't live in Canada TOO. But I was born there and lived there until I moved to Bristol (if you'd ever visited my personal page you'd know this). And then I moved to Spain.

Anyhow, you bloody polyglot! Boy your type really annoys me, but only because I'm so envious. I get especially annoyed with people who grew up in multi-cultural families and by the age of five were already fluent in three languages without even trying. Snot fair!

Someone the other day actually asked me WHEN I was going to start learning Spanish! So I poked out his eyes and then threw him into the path of an oncoming bus. Ha! Last time he'll hurt my feelings!

Where do YOU live?

azaharita

Clare:

Sorry, didn't mean to sound patronising. Shalln't do it again. Tell you what - (have I mentioned this before? ) if you're into learning languages, you really should try A744860. Don't laugh - I've got a copy of "Hamlet" on my bookshelf here, written entirely in that language...

H.

Hi all - Hi Jemima!

And yes, Peta *is* my real name, pronounced Peter like the boy's name, Azahar isn't the only one to be lumbered!

>Hi Peta - you were up LATE!

I know, I couldn't sleep - and I have real trouble logging on and talking during the day now, we've got about four up and coming sites now, and its a real drain on the chatting bit!

> I can say with certainty that I don't lie to children. If they ask me a question, I do my best to answer it honestly and in a way they can understand, and if I don't know, I tell them I don't know (I've seen a lot of adults who hate admitting ignorance to a child). That applies to children of friends and family, and would likely apply even more to any theoretical child of mine.
I totally agree with this neither do I. Lying to children is just immoral and confusing. I told my children that if they were bad they would get coal in their stockings instead of gifts, but they knew that this wouldn't happen, it was just a joke and they recognised it as such. Children are wonderfully sophisticated, I didn't really grasp the fact until I had them, but they're just as intelligent and perceptive as children as they will be as adults, they just lack the store of built up knowledge and experience that adults have, so duping a bright five year old is *just* as hard as duping a bright adult. I have a bright kid and a very not so bright kid, so I know a bit about this one!

I think my son saw through it all very early on, he set traps too (and so did I as a kid; so I was wise to it, but yes, he caught me out eventually!) but I think he enjoyed the game. It's a lot like flirting - you know the truth , you're activity participating, but you know it's a game that leads nowhere,
it's just a fun game that parents and children enjoy playing *together*. I try to pull the wool over your eyes and you see through it and try to catch me out. It's a great idea! If anything it actually increases the childs acumen - 'everything you're told isn't necessary true' isn't a bad lesson to learn early on.

My not so bright child didn't really twig it until after she started her periods, which is really weird , but she just accepts the knowledge as part of growing rights and says that she enjoyed believing, whilst she did. She's gullible to a tea, so again, learning that some things are fictional may not be a bad thing. Although I have to say that this is the girl who wandered through Battersea Park as a four year old and baldly asked "I used to take my baby here, to see the fountains, what happened to the fountains?" in the area that *used* to have fountains, 50 years ago - so what the hell is going on in her mind anyway? She's 'special' and a one off, but she does make me question my *real* view of the world, which can only be a good thing.

>I'm PHYSICALLY excited at the prospect of the new Matrix movie. When I see the trailer, my pulse quickens.

Oh god, a geek, nerd person. My son is *exactly* the same!

> What's worrying and dangerous is when people can't distinguish fantasy from reality.

I think children can differentiate. Their brain is exactly the same one as they have as an adult. My son was totally able to realise that movies were fantasy from about the age of nine, he can watch any movie or read any book (I bought the latest Hannibal Lecter book, saw him reading it and tried to take it away from him, he told me it was far too late because he'd read it four times already!) I on the other hand have a totally overactive imagination and can't cope with horror movies at all. I'm a complete wuss!

> Not being able to distinguish fantasy from reality is DANGEROUS.

Whose reality? My daughter believes that she was in a park, with her daughter, some 30 years before I was born. Who's right? Me with my logical fact based knowledge of what is possible, in my view, or her with a memory? Scary thought; at least for me!

> And valium has predictable (mostly) measurable chemical effects on the brain. So it IS better than homeopathy, in that if you take it, you KNOW that what is happening to you is down to the valium. You can't say the same for homeopathic remedies.

I totally agree with you. I've taken it, for like two days when my daughter was diagnosed with problems, and hated the effect on me. But anyone who takes *anything* and finds that it helps them in anyway is onto a good thing! Life can be stunningly hard, If it helps, then it's good.

> "Each to their own..."
Absolutely. And a rationalist position would allow that. It's the myth-believers who DON'T go with that. Try preaching "each to their own" in Jerusalem or Riyadh, and see how far you get...

Women in England got the vote in Engand in the last 100 yearss. Things are moving. It will take time, but hopefully we'll get there.