h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Or, the crap we bring back with us. Cynicism is essential when buying 'authentic' souvenirs for the folks back home. Believe it or not, Spanish people don't actually decorate their homes with stuffed purple donkeys or little plastic matadors. So what do you get them if you find yourself in a touristy Spanish resort? It's simple; just get an empty bottle (in Ibiza you won't have to look hard) and fill it with sand from the beach. This especially appeals to the more sentimental gift receiver. Now you can also buy Spanish air in cans. Do not buy this! Apart from the fact that it's a total waste of pesetas, the cans could expand and explode in the aeroplane on the way home, ripping a hole in the hull and dooming the plane to a watery grave.

That's not the souvenir most people bring back from Ibiza! And try to avoid bringing back any tropical or intimate diseases. It's not clever.