A Conversation for Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 1


The issues of Dominance and submission (D/s) in a relationship, in particular one that involves two "equals" co-habitating can and does directly relate to the overall status of the health of that relationship.

"D" determines when and where and how something occurs; be it a social engagement, holiday, conversation or sexual activity. The issues can be unlimited within the relationship and can alternate between the couple. In other words a "D" can become an s within a certain set of parameters or areas where "s" is more comfortable and D is less comfortable. It is unfortunate though as this situation can become extremely rocky at best. Roll reversals may come hard if not non-existent as it remains human nature to remain in control of one's surroundings.

Generally speaking D tends to remain in the dominant throne by either passively or aggressively wielding the "power". At times this may be knowingly ["I just never want to"] or sometimes unknowingly ["not to night..."].

"s" on the other hand is faced with multiple choices. Passive - aggressive responses. With aggression - either verbal or physical actions are made. Passive; by removing oneself from the situation or at the next opportunity taking a "d" role in some minor way.

s may also play the game and reverse the roles when able or total submission (as "s" implies) in some major way. This might be a better mix for the relationship a s's and D's oscillate comfortably.

Healthy relationships can evolve around a D/s scenario only if adequate give and take - compromise and mutual understanding exists. The converse may, however, come about from which D or s is unwilling to realize the setting within the relationship.

Example: D controls all of the social engagement activities. Not only the when, but the where, with whom and the how fall into place as D determines the variables. s must then face an all or nothing within this aspect of the relationship, assuming s wants social relationships. Does s go out and seek their own social engagement? Capitulate to not having a social life? Attempt to seek a compromise within the social setting by acceptance?

s may also reach (lash?) out into another facet of the relationship in order gain dominance by taking a "D" role. This is usually not a positive outcome as s may with hold or seek verbal-physical retribution within the relationship. D may also feel challenged and conflict results.

It is at this point that a full look at the relationship should be made. Counseling, objective learning and listing and compromises will need to be investigated. smiley - erm

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 2


Healthy relationships do not need ds, as ds is a very natural phenomena and has only reached its prominence through the media.
Most ds relatiohships are short term and nearly allways exhibit some powerful problems.
Check out your local fetish club if you want to find out. Its all on the net.

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 3


What are you talking about?

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 4


just cutting through the bull.
Experience is a far better teacher than reading or dreaming.

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 5


Well, what you are saying I can't make sense of, so if you want to 'cut through the bull' you should make youself clearer. It sounds like you are saying such things only exist because the media says they do and that anyone trying such a lifestyle is bound to have a screw lose.

Which is complete shite.

Dominance and submission - a Power Exchange Relationship

Post 6


Its only personal experience based on many years observation.
Personal relationships, and attendances to pretty much every fetish club in the south west of england and many more.
Ive also worked in the industry for some 15 years.
Im sure that you are much younger and have had a great deal of experience too.

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