How to Drink in Utah Content from the guide to life, the universe and everything

How to Drink in Utah

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If you've never visited Utah, USA, you will never know how hard it is to find a decent drink. For those outside of the United States, this state will seem to be exceptionally bizarre.

For those of you who live within the US, but outside of Utah, it will be slightly less confusing. If all you want to drink is watery beer, then Utah's got you covered. If you want a mixed drink, or if you like good beer, then you must be a member of a private club (or in real world vernacular, a bar). Failing that, you must be the guest of a bar member.

The Liquor Laws in Utah

The liquor laws in Utah are partly the result of the local majority religon, the Latter Day Saints (AKA Mormons). They are teetotal by faith and, to a degree, have made the local laws follow suit. While not alone in the US in having restrictive drinking laws, Utah's laws are fairly strange. For example, beer can be served in any tavern or dramshop as long as it contains less than 3.2% alcohol by volume. Wine, mixed drinks and stronger beer can only be served in Private Clubs and Resteraunts.

A Typical Drinking Experience

Say you would like to go dancing with a pretty young thing. You start the night by searching for a parking place within two miles of your favourite house of debauchery. You then hike to the club, walk up to the door and the doorman will ask you for a membership. No membership? Well, you are then consigned to the rank of begging anyone with membership to get you into the club.

Once you've found a friendly person to get you in the door, you'll find that you'll pay twice as much for a pint of Guinness as you would do anywhere else. You relax, you have a spin round the dance floor, and then at 1.15am you get kicked out. This is because the bars in Utah close at 1.00am.

Good Places To Drink

Some friendly places to drink and have a good time in Utah do exsist. X Wives club, for instance, a small billiards bar in Down Town Salt Lake City at 5th South and 700 East, is a great place to have the drink of your choice. Featuring billiards and darts, there is a weekly tournament for members and guests. The bartenders specialise in Long Island Iced Tea and have a good selection of bottled beers and a few local micro brews on tap. If dancing is more your pleasure there's Area 51 in the heart of the Gateway district of Salt Lake. It has a Gothic scene not found at any other area club. With DJ's playing six nights a week there is a variety of musical choices. If you want to laugh and listen to stand up comedy go to Comedy Circut in Midvale Utah. But watch out - it's only a tavern, so you'll just get the weak Utah beer served everywhere else.

Anyway, soon enough you'll realise that Las Vegas is only six hours away, so you'll probably jump into a car, and speed away.

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