h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Pastey - I'm sorry. I know you're being defensive of VIP, and I didn't want to drag you into the argument.

Best to forget it, huh?

B

I'm not actually being defensive of anybody, this is just the way I am

And bitter is the way I am...at least when VIP gets mentioned.

B

But you're the one that keeps mentioning her name

Nevermind, back to topic...

Which was what? I forget.

B

Masturbation I believe. How could you forget that?

Hey...as a female with excellent technique, I resent it being assumed I don't know how to give good hand. No abrasions or discomfort from this end here...

Or am I mis-reading stuff?

No, you're not misreading, but who says you've got excellent technique.

You might think you have, but most men are too polite (or possibly too scared) to tell you otherwise.

B

Because the *slow but steady* rule applies to both sets of genitals...I'm careful! Men are notoriously easier to bring to orgasm than women...

Anyhoo, I'm not soliciting my wares over the internet...unless you are one of two people, which Master B, I believe you aren't

No, I'm not Robson Green or Harrison Ford.

I'm not sure about the 'slow and steady' rule at all. Try that with some men and you'll never get anywhere (so I'm given to understand). Likewise, I've been with some women that just can't do it unless you treat them surprisingly rough.

Sorry - but there's no substitute for experience.

B

True, very true...but there is basic technique, and there is basic technique...

'Mock if you like, but it's so much nicer when your partner knows what they're doing, and not from finding out by being a slapper.'

Hmmm so how are we meant to find out how to do it if we can't practice? Sit in the convent and read Harold Robbins?

B, if you really do have something against me in person, at least don't post it over a public site. If you do feel hurt, angry at me, whatever, then email me, talk to me. Don't just let it build up and get resentful. I'm still not quite understanding what you said back there. It's not stuff to post here. Talk to me. I don't like people either getting angry at me or getting the wrong impression of me. And I seem to think that you are the former, and trying to convince everyone of the second. Okay, as a rather bad and not very funny joke, I can let it wash. But that was a deliberate dig and I don't like it.

VIP

"Hmmm so how are we meant to find out how to do it if we can't practice? Sit in the convent and read Harold Robbins?"

Isn't that where communication comes in??

"YYYYYYYyyyyyyyooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuucccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh - not so hard ! ! !"

Communication is the trick. And so is practice. But it's the combination of these that I find particularly great. And each person reacts differently to different things. You have to learn new techniques for each new partner, what they like, what they don't like, what makes them smile, what makes them groan.
Watching their faces and twitches, listening to their breathing.

VIP - I don't think anyone has a bad impression of you. Most of us have been through the bitterness patch...so don't worry

*back on topic*

TOO HARD...pft. See, that's why I have good technique. Gentle, but firm...gets you everywhere in life.

Ah, but some men *do* like it a little firmer. It's the same as I've found with women, and please tell me if I'm way out here, but tastes are very personal. What pleases one horrifies another.

Of course...but then a lot of people like to lick shoes to get them off...

I do believe there is a generic way of doing things though...

I'm suprised no one has come up with a list of hints and tips yet...