h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

ah

even tho we had our first ...spat last nite it is going okay a bit slowwwwwww but okay... fine in the friendship department but...

i want more



...

it has occurred to me (wow occurred has two r's why is that?) that a nice little make out session would be so much fun... and in keeping with the ssssssslow progression of our involvement...

yes



i am envisioning a nice make out session




hows it going with you?

up and down, way up at the weekend then crashed right down yesterday, fairly apathetic today.

ohhhh....

sorry to hear um read that! here is a crying towel

i am using a friend's computer right now... my computer is in the shop... i accidently spilt beer on it ...in it i mean... was the second one (beer) so that partially explains it... the rest of the explanation is that it was the first time i actually put a liquid on the same surface as my laptop and wouldnt you know...

aaaaanyway... got the estimate and its not so bad... just a keyboard replacement which is cheaper than the labor of swabbing the entire keyboard that is there right now... $150 expensive lesson but cheaper than it could have been!!

get it back tomorrow or the next day.


so... it is five days after you posted that... how're things now?

things are grrrrrreat with me! my Friend and i have come to an understanding thank goodness and are now friends for shure... i kinda dumped all over him cupla nites ago on the phone ...got some stuff offa my chest and he was very understanding and we cleared up some misunderstandings about how we feel and the consensus is that we both feel affection for each other but we are not in Love.... whew... what a relief!

i mean that we are on the same page is the relief... i hate not knowing what is going on!! especially since we live on the same property and canna avoid running into each other... acause i don't know how to hide how i feel and my vibes get real weird when i am not sure what is going on

did i tell you i am flying to the mainland on friday? the 25th ...really looking forward to seeing friends and family!!

Up and down?
Sounds more like a roller-coaster than a merry-go-round.

more like a see-saw (to keep the playground analogy)

actually... that was TB who said that... the up and down thingy...


as for my playground... hmmm funny thing is i decided to shut it down for a while because i was getting frustrated and... that dang merry-go-round keeps starting up and going round for no reason whatsoever that i can see...



i guess it has a mind of its own

I'm a bit better at the moment, I've got stuff I've got some stuff to keep me occupied, which helps take my mind off stuff.
As, I think, you know, I'm in love with someone who's not in love with me, you know how it is, but I'm willing to be her friend, as that's better than nothing.

oh you betcha !

and funny thing is... turns out the friendship can actually be meaty enuf... have enuf substance to make any Love Affair pale in significance... if if if you're truly being a friend and... haha... there's the rub!

so what i am finding out is that i have lots to learn about being a good friend. an how can i know about being a lover if i don't even know how to be a friend? so it is really working out great for me... an opportunity to learn something i really need to know to get on with things!

I just wish it didn't hurt so much, and I can't let her know, that it hurts, because it's my problem and it's no fault or responsibility of hers that I feel this way.

okay... i know what you mean... because i was hurting too...

and since i am not now... which is partly because he has not cut me off... i can still interact with him...
since i am not now hurting maybe i should tell you what my mind set is that causes me not to hurt...

first of all... i am not even sure anymore that i am in love with him... i dunna even know what 'in love with' actually is anyway... but be that as it may... i do like him very much and love spending time with him... . ...thing is our friendship seems to be surpassing any friendship i have had in the past... partly because i am putting out more for him than i have others... and partly because he hasn't cut and run but has stayed calm haha and remained a friend... aaaaand that friendship is so rewarding and frees me up so much from all that oh poor me he doesnt love me garbage...

secondly... i am learning to be in the present... not the past or the future but the now... its not easy... but being aware of what is going on now... not what is going on in my head but what is going on now.... the music... the keyboard... the typing... the wind in the trees outside... looking at the past or future, to avoid the present, sabotages my chances of relating to anything that is happening now... because i am not fully aware of the now... only partially. and its hard i have to keep reminding myself i even have the word 'awareness' on my bathroom mirror and i still forget...

anyway... there is more but those two things are the first i thought of for now...

I tend to live for the now, as, following me nearly dying from liver disease at 15, I tend to be more aware of the fact that I may not be alive this time tomorrow.
I've 'liked' her for looooooooooooooooooong time now and I suspect it'd be easier if I lived closer to her as then I could be there when she needs her friends around and stuff.

okay... forgive me for being a total ditz and not seeing you...
and who am i to give advice when i don't even know the score?

wow... liver disease at 15... i had a feeling you had some life changing thing going on or recently gone on... so you are okay now?

and... can you start up an internet friendship with her? emails? if phones are too expensive? just a thing where you can share fav youtube stuff or other internet stuff? casual...

pst, keep quiet about it, but she's on here. She knows how I feel about her, I kinda wanted to make sure she knew I understood that she didn't feel quite the same way about me as I do about her and that I was willing to just be her friend, and that I'd always be there for her.

And don't worry about not knowing the intimate details of my medical history, I may be fairly open about it, but I don't go shouting it from the rooftops.

um don't look now but this thread is common knowledge here

she's not on here too much at the moment and I trust her not to read my posts if she a) finds this thread and b) realises what I'm talking about.

dream on babbling brook!! even i read some of your other posts!!

But as you're not on her friends list she'd have to actually go searching for this and, as I said before I trust her.
On a completely different note, I'm thinking of doing a livejournal entry called 'Equality my @r$€' about the 'glass ceiling' and it will contain the following

"If a man and a woman, equal in all other respects, were both up for the same promotion and they were told that the promotion would go to the first one to dress up in a bright pink frilly bikini and run around the square mile of the city of london, getting photos of themselves along the way for inclusion in the corporate newsletter, the man would be back and uploading the images onto the company's file server whilst the woman was still b!t¢h!ng about how it's demeaning and sexist to want her to wear a bikini."

How much hate mail do you think I'll get from outraged uber feminists?

probably alot!!

but... if it was maui... the woman would be first home with the goods
...people here wear as little as possible and its actually considered unevolved to balk at wearing a bikini
... pink frilled or not!!

sounds like a fun place to be

yah... unless you don't look good in a bikini...

most women look good in a bikini, it's just many of them don't realise it.