h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They are cool. It's just bloomin' anyoing when you go to put on a pair of jeans to find a spider underneath them. I've taken to giving all of my clothes a good shake before i put them on if, i see spiders in my room.

I think they like it because it's warmer than oustide!

I once saw a spider fly across the room... Of course, I'd thrown it, but that didn't make it any less spectacular. And why the hell would I want to swallow all those reference books? I wouldn't have room for my dinner (which is prawn curry, if you're interested). And that, as everyone that knows me knows, would be terrible - I'd probably kill everyone. Then eat them.

Cannibal!

I'm very kind to s - I put them outside and let them go. Anyone who doesn't do that is being unnecessarily cruel. Poor little s!

I just let them roam free!

I squash s on a regular basis, I'm afraid.

Murderer!

I was thinking that. How would Boris feel?

I know. I was going to let him out again, but he might see this thread...

Poor Boris!

Give him from me.

pops up and jumps onto Axi's shoulder.

:Cheesecake? Thank you Mr. Pingu.

No problem!

to wash it down?

: Boris does not like alcohol, Mr. Pingu. He perfers

is good for your bones.

Does that apply to Boris?

Yes, Boris has bones. Don't you, fella?

*I give him a friendly tickle*

Well, it's nice to see that Boris is back agin. I've missed him. Where were you hiding him, Axi? Oh yes, have some from me too, Boris. Unless you're full?

Yeah don't give Boris too much he might explode!

Well, Boris seems like a nice enough , it's just the ones that watch me in the shower that I'm worried about!

Yeah Boris is very nce. He lent me !