h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

(A few people have already heard this story, thought I'd just throw it here to keep everyone in the know... )

*names have been changed to protect the exploited

Before we start, let me tell you my Evan Smith story…

I met Evan about 4 years ago…just after I started going out by myself…he was a sweet, lovely boy…we exchanged numbers…but he never called, and I never called…

…Evan has since become more of a concept than a person…an analogy that proves that I regret things I don’t do more than the things I do…I’ve been in a million dodgy, ridiculous and just plain wrong "relationships" in the last 4 years…but I don’t regret those as much as I regret not calling Evan…

And now, back to the story…

I think we’re all aware of the whole Boy/Girl fiasco (in a nutshell, tanzen sweet on Boy…Girl sweet on tanzen )…well, on Thursday night I went out for beer & pool with the girl…purely “as mates”…and trust me, she brought it up a million times more than I did…we were just hanging out as mates and everything was groovy…

…well, the place we were drinking at ran out of stout and Girl ran out of change, so we moved to a pub closer to her house…about 5 or 10 minutes away from my local…

…so we’re playing pool at the Royal…everything’s beer and skittles (more beer than skittles, but you know me )…and who happens to “drop in” out of the blue…well, that would be young Boy, wouldn’t it…?? Next thing I know Girl’s leaving because “she’s jealous” and I have to try and explain to Boy why she’s p*ssed off when he was trying to be friendly…and I haven’t seen her since…

Saturday night…

Went to the local (as usual) with my girl and the kids…now my girl is one of these über friendly bubbly people who will start random conversations with random people…anyway, this is how we met Guy…very cool…may very well be my male counterpart…obviously a Capricorn…very witty and serious and drinks Guinness and Irish Whiskey…truly a man after my own heart…anyway we kept running into each other and eventually my girl ran off with the other girls and I was playing pool with a mate…and Guy sits down to chat…very lovely man…I cannot emphasise that enough…

…anyways…we were chatting about tattoos…he said he hadn’t gotten any because he’s worried he’ll be embarrassed of them as time goes on…so I said that I tend to regret things I don’t do more often then things I do…and to illustrate this, I told him my tale of the mythical Evan Smith…

“That’s the spookiest thing I’ve ever heard in my life…” says he
“Why’s that?” I replied
“Because I live with Evan Smith”…

…ok…kill me…kill me now…

This all happened the week before last, I will try to keep everyone posted with the events as they occur...

Interesting story, suprise ending. Kind of a shocking end. truely a soap opera. no wonder you suffer from kismet overload. Small world I guess

A line from a song comes to mind...

"These things happen to other people...they don't happen at all, in fact..."
(She's An Angel - They Might Be Giants)

I know it's funny, trust me, I acknowledge the hilarity of it all...and all in the one week...funnier still...

...it would just be more funny if it wasn't my life......

PS - Any tv execs wanting to use my life as a sitcom/movie, I'm open to negotiation...

It would make a good sitcom story. Its always better to see from a distance than to actualy be involved in such things. Kinda like a car wreck ...Ive had a few minor accidents but never have I been a witness to one. wierd
My uncle wants to use the comp for a bit so Ill have to let you go. Ill be on in a little bit tho, I just cant keep away from this site for one reason or another ***waves his

*waves in return*

I know one day I'll be able to look back on all this and laugh...even though chances are after the dust settles on this debacle I'll still be single...

It may be that my purpose in life is purely to serve as a warning to others...

I TRY to learn from others mistakes but I always seem to be caught up in one of my own so I'm too busy to pay attention. Cant wait to get my license back, I'll try my hardest to follow ALL the rules and not give in to the dark side. Ive led a life of anarchy for too long. I need some peace and freedom

Ahh...the dark side...so alluring...so tempting...so full of pretty shiny things...

And if I knew what the lesson was here, I might even learn from it...but if it's a question of kismet, I still don't know who I'm supposed to "be" with...

...convent life is looking better all the time...

I am drawn to pretty, shiny things, too bad they're so expensive so I have to settle for functional and not-so-shiny. Aw well, window shopping aint so bad

I think windows are pretty and shiny...

...'night son, I'll chat with you tomorrow

enjoy the movie **more waving

I used to not believe that things like that could happen until I travelled 3,000 miles only to be tapped on the shoulder in the street by my parent's neighbour and then check into a hostel run by someone who lived in the same building as me back home. That and the fact that I am well known as a Capricorn who puts a shot of Irish in his stout and calls it *Black Death*..........

You have a wonderful life! Get on with it!



Keep us informed, will ya?

Zoomer, you're a Capricorn?

Have you ever had an "Irish Black Russian" (now THAT I'd like to see )...but drink-wise...it's a pot (Half-pint) of stout with a shot of kahlua and a shot of vodka...

...my girl is a big fan of the IBR...but I drink pints...so on Saturday night we each got a pint of Guinness...with 2 shots of vodka...and 2 shots of kahlua...

...by the end of that drink we were both VERY happy ...

Still, I'm glad I'm not the only one with the strange life...I will keep you all posted

Tanzen, darlin'! This Friday is payday so IBRs will be consumed in great quantities!

btw, isn't the proper order *Black Irish Russians*? Historically and a la The Commitments.

Also btw, the girl and The Girl- are they the same in your story, and who are the kids?

Just wondering...

Ooooooh...January 5 btw (again)- I'll have a kiss, hug, and when it comes around.

my girl and The Girl are different...that's a little confusing isn't it? The Girl is the one who was sweet on me...and is now no longer talking to me ...and my girl is my pub twin...my partner in crime...

I don't know the proper terming of the drink...all I know is a Black Russian is vodka and kahlua...and Guinness makes it Irish !

(Oh, and I'm Decmeber 31 )

Just a trivial juxtaposition of words. Enjoy, enjoy... I swear I will hoist a drink for you on the weekend. You're a treat... and doubly so since you are a goat as well, if not an old one like me.

Didn't you just hate it when your birthday presents were less because of Christmas?

Not only am I a goat...I was born in the year of the goat...and you know what they say...

"Sheep go to heaven...goats go to hell" !

I used to be annoyed by the lack of birthday presents, but now it's exceoptionally better...my birthday is on New Year's Eve...there's always a party...and at the pub (because so many people know me) I end up buying ridiculously few drinks for myself...

I swear there should be some kind of *Western Express* or whatever so researchers could buy drinks for other researchers at their local. I swear it would be popular.

Me Dad was Jan 4 so we got to celebrate together most times, apparently I missed his B'day by 45 minutes. btw, I was 13 lbs when born and the family joke was I was almost named *Ouch!*

Having worked on a sheep farm, I'd rather be a goat any time! (Hades or not!)
See my thread *Stupidest Animals on the Face of the Earth*...

Here's to you and from you and to you again, and when we get to you we're with you again. (One of my collection of toasts)



Off to eat (supper time here)