h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Not as funny as me.

Sorry, I'm being narcissistic again.

The bad Tom Jones joke brought a smile to my face.

Thankyou.

It didn't make me laugh though. The only jokes that I read here that tend to laugh at are the ones I make myself (and the time that Wolfie said "Have you ever milked a beaver?" without realising the double entendre. )

Tch. Dirty minded boy.

Well, I wasn't aiming for hilarity. Just a reasonable level of amusement.

Well then you hit your target. But you have a loing way to go if you want me to laugh as mush as I did yesterday when I sw the Smurfs being killed.

I'm not too bothered. I only asked, because my friends here are sick of my neurotic questioning.

So you decided to annoy me insead. No wonder I'm feeling depressed.

Yeah. Sorry. It's just... I'm a bit confused. I was trying to work out why Jake wanted to be with me... He keeps saying I'm beautiful, which is not true, and sexy which is about as far from reality as we can get without going full circle and meeting ourselves from behind. But he said I was funny, which may have some basis in truth, and he said he just likes being around me, which is nice... He said I'm amazing, but got p*****d off when I asked for a quantified definition of amazing... So I thought I'd bug you instead.

See, this is why I don't have boyfriends.

So you're asking stupid questions that annoys the guy; trust me, men are used to that.

That doesn't make it ok, though. I try to be considerate.

Well, I'm off to do the washing up now. See you.

See, there's proof that you're not becoming like me.

Good news! I've just watched an episode of Arrested Development, and now I'm on a comedy-high.

What's that? Arrested development, I mean.

It's a glorious American sit-com about a dysfunctional millionaire family that have their assets frozen, and now they're forced to get by in the real world. I know that the description sounds like an unfunny cliché, but it's really funny.

OK. Good. Fortunately, I live in the real world.

I tried going there once, but I prefered TV.

Well, TV is less messy. But it doesn't taste as good.

I don't know, I think that a dead dove covered in blue paint would taste quite nice (it's an in-joke).

I don't know, I think a dead dove covered in blue paint would be very nice.