h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The chicken was a success on the whole.

Just realised this is going to be my first five day week for a few weeks. And I don't like it.

What a great time for you have to do the full shift. When you're being abused by Man Utd fans.

Obviously the Football Gods organised that one, Mac.

Is it true about Owen Hargreaves joining Citeh? Surely that's got to be the oddest move of the window. They'll probably pay him 200 grand per week and he's only got one leg.

It's probably a fairly decent leg in fairness but still....

Mertesacker arriving for a medical allegedly. He'll fall off the treatment table during his scan obviously.

I was just reading his injury history and he had retinal damage at one point.

As for Hargreaves, as far as Sky are concrerned, it is true. If it's just to say 'haha look who signed for us Man Utd', it's pretty strange. Pretty strange anyway although a one legged player is someone I would still rate higher than Barry.

He got a boxer's injury playing football?

I reckon a blind one-legged man would be more useful than Barry.

Quicker too.

A blind one-legged man that has no interest in football too, probably.

And Mertesacker is a bit of a bruiser. I hope.

I just read that QPR might spend 11 million on Peter Crouch.

11 million???

That surely has to be the most preposterous runour of the day. (I'm not counting the Sneijder to Arsenal rumour because that went beyond preposterous). How can somebody who plays second fiddle to Pavlyuchenko half the time be worth 11 million?

You think we might be trying to sign Cahill on a bosman at the end of the season? It would be nice to annoy Gartside. Although maybe le Boss should ring Garside today and offer him three million for Cahill just for the hell of it.

I'd offer him a box of doughnuts.

Crouch must have amsssaed quite a lot in transfer fees over the year. Journeyman does not cover it. I think he is worth 11 million just based on him being English. It's a very valuable nationality.

I don't understand why English players are so valuable.

We appear to be getting Mertesacker (75 caps for Germany) for less than we would have paid for Cahill (3 caps for England).

Is it because of England's legendary run of success at International level?

I think that's it Jack. Three caps for England are worth far more than a German cap, I mean, when do you ever see Germany get to the end of a tournament?

The very idea is ridiculous, Mac.

They must hate having to fly home all the time while England are preparing for the latter stages.

I mean think of all the times that England went further in the World Cup than Germany. There was 1966 of course. And then there was.....oh, all those other times that I can't recall off the top of my head.

Well maybe our memory is just hazy Jack.

That must be it, Mac.

Anyway, time for me to go.

Tomorrow we'll discuss the other 243 players that Arsenal are about to sign for a total of 1290639992227 gazillion pounds.

Have a good one Jack.

It's going to be quite crazy tomorrow.

Morning.

So, apparently we had the coldest June for 50 years followed by the coldest July for 40 years folowed by the coldest August for 25 years. Does this mean the weather is getting better?

Anyway, today's the day that Jim White gets to shout at us from the Sky Sports studio. I always hate him for it but I'll keep watching anyway.

Morning All

Finally made it back to work not that I have done very much this morning

Children back to school today so the weather is expected to be 20 degrees at the end of the week

Morning PSD.

My kids don't go back until tomorrow.

Ewnjoy the time off?

And what were you doing with your kitchen exactly?

Everyone must have gone for a short sausage roll then

Sausage roll?

Me?

I don't know what gave you that impression.

Was getting my auld kitchen ripped out and a new one in - hence all the trips to IKEA

Well its in and we can't find anything now

And the walls need sanded and painted so still looks pretty temporary