h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ah, well, God backwards is of course doG. So that's them sorted. But rat? Rat backwards is tar. Which makes no sense at all. Oh well, it was worth a try...

Tarred and feathered perhaps? Ostrich feathers are good.

For what, exactly, besides putting them in showgirls' hair?

Ostrich feathers are good for tickling people, although...any feather is good for that I suspose, don't you??? Please say you do..
*Leaves forum with tail between his legs*

How did you get that tail? that'd be a tale to tell...

AAH... Me and my igenious ways, evolution i suspose anyway have you checked out my page recently it has lots of new stuff. It has grown quite impressively over the last few days

....he spams modestly

Ostrichs don't like cheese

Their loss.

I did mean to say "nice page" a couple of posts back, but alas incompetence crept in.

The Swiss ostrichs like the holes in gruyere cheese.

Thanks. Comments and flattery always appriciated.

Is the ostrich thing because there is no sand in switzerland for them to stick their heads into? Or do they like the taste?
"the only things to come out of switzerland are chocolate and cuckoo clocks. Think about that." - someone witty and famous.

P.S As an Australian, I would like to know this: Do New Zealanders really say "choice, Bro" a lot? This is a common impression.

Lake Geneva has sandy beaches. The mountain ostriches put there heads in the holes in the cheese.

John Cleese once lived in Switzerland as did David Niven.

Only our less bright Maori friends use pathetic, outdated, black American slang.

The aborigines will start using it in 20 years time.

John Cleese only went to Switzerland for "treatment", didn't he?

Ah, New Zealand, Always one step ahead of us.

Charlie Chaplin moved to Switzerland when he fell out with the Yankee "Reds Under The Beds" witchhunt crowd in the 50s.

His wife (who I believe his still alive) and most of his children still live there.

I imagine quite a few Aussie politicians have money stashed in Switzerland. Which brings us back nicely to the cookoos.

what on earth is a cookoo?

A cuckoo overdozed on chocolate

That'll learn it. No more pushing eggs out of nests for THAT bird.

Whoa - are you being quite racist, or are you joking, because i know plenty of pakeha who say choice, and plenty of Maori who are smart. if you're joking can i say that it's not really very funny. This may sound a bit heavy for a light h2g2 forum, but i think it's pretty bloody important, don't you?!

For the record, the NZ-ism "choice bro' " is most often used ironically, or in old movies. I have met people who actually say it and mean it, but this seems to be predicated not on the colour of your skin, but the amount of hooch you just took. Loony&PP, I'm afraid Spanner is right - no rubber chicken for you. Instead, tonight you take home the "Hon. John Carter Memorial Foot-In-Mouth" award, for mistaking speaking-your-mind with actually-having-something-to-say. Remember kids, it's all fun and games until someone gets kicked in the nadgers.

Wait till I get the name of the bloke who let sheilas into public bars

Gee, a War of Words in my very own forum. Thanks for dropping by, Spanner and Johnny. I think loony's last comment was ironic, before you set out to lynch him.
The reason I was asking about "choice, bro" is that 2 popular DJ's in Australia say it quite a lot in a new zealand accent. Before anyone accuses me of bigotry, it is all in good fun (if not taste) and is actually piss-funny.
P.S who is John Carter, Johnny?