h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Uhm, howdy.

I'm trying to think of the best way to... introduce myself. I'm not going to start with the usual boundless energy that most researchers tend to have, but neither am I going to start my usual depressing cal. A friend on h2g2 showed me your space, they were going to talk but they didn't feel qualified to comment. She's lovely, I suggest you call in on her, Existential Elevator, she listens and has always been there when I do want to talk. Which isn't often.

So, before I tell you what I came here to say, I'll just tell you a bit about myself (It seems appropriate). Yeah, I adore Muse (I secured, with a speed normally associated with Road Runner, tickets for their tour in November), saw Placebo at Brixton 'cademy few months ago, very good, love Monty Python and The Matrix.

So, to the relevant stuff. I cut myself, and I know the almost addictive quality you talked about. The pain was the only thing that made me feel alive, it just felt that pain is the only way of reminding myself. It make me feel human.
Before I get carried away on that I'll move on. I haven't done it in a while, mainly due to lack of opportunity and overly concerned friends who have made a habit of getting excessively worried every time I sport a new plaster or bandage. It's such a struggle trying not to, I usually just tend to keep myself busy and surrounded by people so I don't think about it.

School got involved due to a nervous breakdown. Saw a counsellor, I tell you CS, there were two of us in that room... one of us was crazy... and it sure as hell wasn't me.

In the end it resulted in a trip to the doctors. I was just told it's either another dose of counselling or the happy pills. I chose neither. I didn't want the humiliation all over again and I try to avoid drugs at all costs. Did acupuncture make a real difference? I'm interested.

Heh, normally I tend to stay in my own space and keep myself to myself. So this is a big step, me actually talking to someone and not waiting for them to talk to me. Give that man a coconut.

Anyway, I'm around, so if you feel like you want to reply (God knows why you would) I'd want to talk.

Ta,
-Nate

*feels stupid*

That should be 'made me feel human'.

Lord knows I'm awful about any sort of gramatical mistake on my part.

Hi,
Here is a virtual coconut, hope it tastes nice.
Wow, it's cool someone replied, I wasn't expecting anyone to. I'd only just joined and I thought I might as well let some of the stuff I was feeling out.
I agree, counselling isn't the best of things. Not that I really got it at school, my head of year just said could I come and see her at lunch, because with all the things on my mind I wasn't really bothering with work, and this unnerved the teachers because usually I did OK in most things. I ended up crying uncontrollably (which is strange because I hardly ever cry in public). Not nice.

Give your friends coconuts too, they sound cool. My friends are concerned too, but their concern varies: Karen is quite scornful, Lani is completely revolted. The others don't really get it aside from Ellie, I think I mentioned her in the journal entry thing. She does it too, and usually I call her or whatever if I feel that way but she's in America at the mo and as she says "8000 miles between us cramps my style". People do help, but at the time I did things I didn't really have anyone (apart from my sister who was annoying me) to distract me. Do you know a feeling where you feel incredibly empty? It was like that.

I'm glad you haven't done anything in a while. How long has it been? For me, 10 days and counting. Hopefully the time between incidents will stretch out.

Yes, acupuncture is great, though I suppose it depends on who you have. We had a chat about it before the first time, and that was helpful too because I find talking about stuff unburdens me ... though if I'm talking I tend to get inarticulate so people have to be patient. I had regular treatments for a while, like once a week, once every two weeks, that sort of thing, now I go back if I feel bad, so hopefully the craving doesn't arise. As a bonus, she also cured my hayfever!

On another note, I saw Placebo at Brixton too! (The 23rd of April, right?) It was my first time and they were amazing weren't they? I remember one song where Stefan had a lit cigarette in his mouth the entire time, I'm surprised his head didn't explode.
We're both roadrunners together, cause I'm seeing Muse in December as well, I'm so looking forward to it ... have you heard their new stuff? Stockholm Syndrome and Time Is Running Out? I tried watching the TIRO video but my internet connection is totally incompetent.
My gosh, what a long email-type-thing. Generally I keep myself to myself too, this is quite out of character.
Bye,
-Hannah

Howdy,

Oh wow, didn't know they made virtual ones! Neat.

I know the feeling. Just feeling so hollow and empty. That massive sense of isolation and seperation. ugh. And thinking about it makes it worse. I've realised that if I try to avoid thinking about it, the problem isn't so bad. 60's pop helps. I know that sounds... urh... crazy... but it helps.

Hmmm, it's been a little less that 2 weeks. I've been surrounded by people constantly so I wouldn't have, no matter how much I wanted to. Last night I made a few scratches, barely anything, just out of sheer frustration. But I stopped, before I did anything drastic again, just tried to calm down.

I tend to keep to my personal space (occasionally make the trip out to read the wowbagger cartoons, again and again...), and if people talk to me then I'll talk back. But friends will occasionally point me in someone's direction. The thing is with h2g2, people find you very quickly. I've been here, on and off, for over a year now (due to having nothing better to do) and people just keep on turning up. I can't say I've ever met anyone I really disliked here. Everyone's... well, really nice.

Creepy.... I don't think they stopped smoking at all, if they did I can't remember. I was somewhat stunned at the time so the evening passed as a blur. I do remember Brian falling over, springing back up to his feet and carrying on as if nothing happened. Which was entertaining.
I think I went to the extra gig they did, due to demand, on the 24th? So that must mean you saw the Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster? Aha, fresh blood. If you aren't already a fan I will convert you.

Yeah, I've heard the new ones. I'm impressed, usually the standard of music isn't so good after the second album (rule of music, the third album tends to be a let down), but Matt Chris and Dom just keep going. Thankgod.
The TIRO video is inspired. It's a spoof of 'Dr Strangelove Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb' by Kubrick. I'll tell you how sad I am, I was watching MTV2 and I heard the opening chords so I flung myself onto the floor (ouch) to the video remote and proceeded to record over my favourite film. Which was a shame to say the least.

toodle pipski,
-Nate

Hello,

You're right about the nice-people thing. I joined a few weeks ago and it's cool, there don't seem to be loads of people being p*ssed off at each other like there are on most other places.

I find there are two types of harm, one to stave off the empty stuff, one to release tension. Which I guess was what you did. If you feel like that again a good thing to do is throw ice at a wall so it breaks. (Not a wall with Muse posters on otherwise my friend Ellie the Muse poster protector will be onto you like a ton of bricks.) Or of course you can listen to 60s pop. *looks doubtful* Oh well, any way you prefer. Personally I listen to either Turin Brakes (soothing, poetic) or Jack off Jill (hyperactive negativity is surprisingly relaxing). My acupuncturist says concentrating on your breathing's very good, a bit like meditation. It helps to focus yourself, calm down.

Yes ... I did see Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster ... hmm, how can I put this? I wasn't that impressed. But maybe it wasn't a great example of them. Still, I saw the lead singer while waiting outside, he was leaning out of one of the windows looking at us. Maybe you can convert me...

I managed to download the Time Is Running Out video earlier today, yes it is very excellent. (If only I had cable) I only wish I'd seen the movie it's a spoof of. I remember my dad telling me it was on TV and saying I should see it. Just goes to show. The Stockholm Syndrome one's very odd though, have you seen it? It's just them, playing, but the camera's one of those heat sensitive ones so they're the wrong colours. Matt red green and yellow is very disconcerting. I have my own example of your videoing stunt though not so impressive: when an advert for Ether Song (Turin Brakes' 2nd album) came on TV when me and my friend were watching late at night I leaped to the end of the sofa and made a noise probably best described as "laughter" but more like a deranged sealion barking. Oh dear...

Bye,
Hannah

Howdy,

I guess I do it because I'd rather take my anger out on myself than another person. I'll just hit something. Sadly it used to get so bad I'd punch the wall. I tore the skin on my knuckles last time (which was hugely unpleasant), and have you ever tried to hide a whole hand from your friends and parents? Tres difficult. So I, being the genius that I am, came up with the following "Note to self: hitting a cushion is a better idea"

I have no admit, when I say sixties pop, I'm talking about Pink Floyd. Yes, I know, not pop, but sixties rock sounds so... incorrect. The only way to calm down is to exhaust yourself so you can't do anything but cry or just push down all your emotions and stay calm.
If that's the case I usually tend to stick with the calmer tracks on my CD's, 'seemann' or something (the bass player, Olli, does a breathtaking solo at the beginning). My parents have been informed I want both played at my funeral (My dad wants 'Jerusalem' played at his) Gee, that sounds somewhat sick when written down... Well. We're not morbid, just prepared. It doesn't help to have a dark sense of humour when you're supposed to be depressed.

Ah dear, not impressed? I have to admit Guy (lead singer) wasn't really with it. Or so it seemed. They're entertaining to watch, but their actual musical talent is minimal live. Heck, at least I don't listen to Busted.

*laughs* You should see what I do when Rammstein come on tv. I was doing sofa olympics (jumping from one end to the other, who can hold a handstand for the longest etc) and I heard the whooshing sound at the beginning, I turned around so fast I tripped over the edge of the carpet and knocked into the fireplace and broke my thumb. I didn't really notice until the end of the song.

Yup, I've seen the Stockholm Syndrome video, it's bizzarre. Half the time it's them playing and then it's sometimes footage you can't quite make out. You get the bits where he's writing 'prisoner' on his arm, with an ice cube possibly? So it shows up on the heat sensitive camera? Oh well. It's interesting. Which is more than you can say for nost other music videos.

ta,
-Nate

Hello there,

Hitting a mattress can also be helpful. Yeesh, I hope your hand's OK now. Did you see that episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer where her mum dies and Xander puts his hand through the wall? *spooky music* that could happen to you...

Hey, it's not *that* morbid to decide what songs you want played at your funeral. Hmmmm, I'm not sure of mine... Perhaps Map Of Your Head by Muse, it'd add a touch of funninesss. Spiral Static, or Mind Over Money by Turin Brakes. The possibilities... endless... Being clever also isn't good if you're miserable, (I am *supposed* to be intelligent) you tend to think about stuff too much. *Sigh* you never can win can you?

Don't Eighties Matchbox B Line Disaster have a song about chickens? or something? Maybe I'm just deluded but I'm sure my friend Lani mentioned it.

Sofa olympics sounds fun but dangerous, you should install safety nets in your living room. Maybe not having cable is a good thing, that way I won't get injured. Handstands huh? I never got the hang of them, I'm not a particularly flexible person. Plus doing them made me feel like I was going to pass out.

Have to vamoose now as my sister just gave me an earful about how long I'm spending on here. Pah.

Howdy,

Nah, I'm not a massive fan of buffy. Maybe if I sat through a whole episode instead of going and watching something else, I'd probably like it. I've watched a couple but it never really sunk in.
Besides I'm not strong enough to put it all the way through a wall... maybe half way...

Yes they do. It's called 'chicken'. An imaginative song title if I've ever heard one. It isn't actually about chickens. I hope it isn't anyway.

I'm the least gymnastic person I know so I tend to use the wall and the side of the sofa. Then they aren't really handstands... but it's fun. I like the idea of safety nets.

Can you believe some little bastard put John Cleese and Douglas Adams up on the http://www.whotokill.com website? The site also features Pope John Paul II, Michael Moore and Jack Nicholson. That's just wrong.

This is going to be a short post, I have to clean up the mess someone has left in their wake. Damn them.

ta,
-Nate

Oh my gosh that is SO frustrating. I'd just finished writing a reply, clicked post message and the page went blank. I had to restart the connection and lo and behold my message was absent. So, you will have to bear with me if the computer suddenly explodes from having a furious teen throw something at it.
Anyway.
So.
What I recall saying was
SOMEONE WANTS TO KILL JOHN CLEESE? Oh my gosh. I am traumatised for life. FOR LIFE. Sorry, it's just I'm quite protective of the Pythons, one of my friends hates them (she has no taste) and so does my ex English teacher, who looks like the devil but aside from that is very cool. However I have recently "got into" them, ie got rather obsessed with them, it was in the middle of the GCSEs and I needed some entertainment. It has got to the point where my sister and I say things like "he is an ex Boromir", about the dude from Lord of the Rings. I was impressed to see the Dead Parrot sketch in your personal space bit. I love the one where it's the dentists as secret agents and gangsters and stuff. And the one where Michael is doing a TV programme on deja vu and gets completely traumatised. Oh, I could go on and on ... but I won't, I don't want to bore you.

Buffy's quite cool, you should give it a go, but not any episodes from the 6th series, it's so morbid and not very good. I'm quite confused though because I skipped series 6 and have only seen about 3 episodes from the last series. Spike's cool though.

This might sound strange (well, I KNOW it sounds strange) but have you ever had a bad experience with cannabis? Don't take offence if you're against drugs (which I am), I'm not suggesting you're a junkie or sound like one but it'd be a strange, strange coincidence, that's all.

Aah, it's nice having someone to chat to, most of my friends are on holiday and since I live in the middle of nowhere it's hard to get hold of them. Still they're coming to my birthday... though that'll probably be scattered with morbid predictions about the results which come out the very next day...

OK, I think that was about it, though please assume I put it all in a much more elegant and sophisticated style, oh yes there was something else, being a fan and all do you know how Eighties Matchbox B Line Disaster got their name? Or do they just like random names? (like Chicken...)

Well howdy,

Sorry it's taken a while to reply (damn my ever so slow typing). I've been somewhat distracted by several overdue Art projects and someone coming to stay for a few days.

You'll be irritated to know it's Muse day on MTV2. Live Muse gigs and endless playings of Muse music videos. Sadly I've been unable to watch them, due to previously made arrangments, it's killing me.

Happy belated Birthday *blows party whistle thing* I hope you had a great time, and congratulations on your exam results (I'm sure they were good) So... a big woohoo all round

I've just found several reasons to be depressed and several reasons to be in stitches. Namely Tillathy doesn't look good in a leotard. Tillathy's daughter is my age. But then again, I just found a photo of members of the band Feeling B (several members later went on to join my favourite band). And these photos are so bad they're blackmail worthy. Par example...
http://www.dasschoenstekind.de/mix2.jpeg
I see... It would appear he's... either doing something guitar related... or... making jewellery... Gawd, poor Flake. If they don't know that these photos are already available to the general public, I'm sure they'll pay big bucks to get them back. *looks at more* Oh dear... a mullet

Can't help you with the name thing. I can tell you how every band got their name, all except for TEMBLD. I'll ask Atari. He'll probably know. I know how the album got it's name... urh, not helpful I know.

Bad experience with cannabis? Hmm... do you mean, taking myself or a friend?

ta ta,
-Nate

Hello,
Hmmm ... yes, I think if I ever join a band (not that it's likely: the only instrument I play is the clarinet and my singing is best not mentioned) I'll try and burn all photos like that one. Forgive my ignorance but who is Tillathy?
Sorry I haven't written for a while, me and two friends went to London last week, which was great, we hung around Camden looking suspicious and I got handcuffs! Yay! (They're for my decor, OK? To go with the sombrero.) Then we got caught up in the blackout thing! I ask you, the one time we go to London and there's a power cut meaning we have to wait at Victoria Station for FIVE HOURS. However we managed to amuse ourselves by singing our own versions of Foo Fighters songs (remember what I said about my singing? It still applies) and making signs "Take us home, we're missing our dinner" and "I'm from Devon, please help us". Hilarity (and probably traumatisation for everyone else) all round. Still, most people ignored us; they probably hoped we'd go away.
Yes, my birthday was good, we all went to the beach and a couple of my friends had a pinata, which attracted a lot of attention... For some reason all the 16th birthdays I've been to have been quite childish, even the ones not hosted by my straight-and-narrow friends. Hmmm, must be some kind of regression.
What I meant about the cannabis was about if you'd done it and were allergic to it or something went wrong, something like that. Gosh, it must sound so weird ... it's not that I've done it, just like I said it'd be a coincidence.
Ta ta for now,
Hannah

Howdy,

I've been kicked out of my own journal entry. I'm somewhat annoyed. I was bored and in need of conversation I admit, but for people to use my journal entry for such sordid purposes as they did, is unacceptable. I don't mind that they started a conversation, it's just that they chose to start talking about Busted. Ahem. Yeah. And I refuse to have my personal space invaded by those talentless eedjits. I know it's wrong to hate, but I think it's understandable in this instance.

Nope, no allergies to cannabis. I am allergic to plasters though... that is a somewhat pathetic allergy.

I found myself walking home with a friend after school (I live half an hours drive away) for no apparent reason except that I had money in my pocket and I wanted to go to claim my free McDonalds milkshake (salmonella poisoning included) the token for which I found in the locker area. On the way I bought a CD which I had been looking for since I heard it a month ago, it hadn't been played again and it was driving me mad. But I found it, £1.99, Still in Love. It's just an incredibly catchy song. But at least it isn't driving me insane any more.

*can't remember why she was talking about him, so goes back and has a look at her previous post* Ah yes. Tillathy. Meh. I made that name up (long story) it's actually Till. He's 40, German, in Rammstein. I refuse to openly admit I fancy him. Except to certain people. Who never hear the end of it. Sadly, I think they're all attractive, and can't stop going on about them. At least I don't rant about Muse anymore. That must have been irritating for the people I was talking to.
"Did you know that Matthew Bellamy's favourite sexual position is..."
"NO I DIDN'T AND QUITE FRANKLY I DON'T CARE! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE YOU FREAK!"
I did actually know that. But only because a friend who used to fancy Matt told me, yeah, he's to blame, not me.

I'm confused. How can you hang around Camden looking suspicious? I'm very familiar with Camden and the people there (they all go to my school or date people at my school) and you must have been doing something really strange... I'm worried... what on earth were you doing?
You were caught out in the blackout? Talk about bad luck. I happened to be away in France on the same day, so good timing there. I bought a anime card catcher folder. Uhm. Woo?
I know what you mean about childish parties. I often make mine as childish as possible. But my best friends party is coming up and a bunch of us are going away for a weekend to the beach and her holiday home. All I have to do is work out what to get her as a birthday present. I already know, but I'm not in the position to fork out £100 for a Litchenstein 'WHAM' print. What about a nice pencil case instead?

What a bloody great big post. You can tell I have nothing to do...
a bientot,
-Nate

Oh ... my gosh... said in a camp male-hairdresser accent ala my friend Andrew ... I have just found out that there was a competition to see Muse, and also there's an "exclusive album playback" of Absolution in a CD shop in Exeter tomorrow when I'm at SCHOOL! WHY DOES FATE (AND MATT, DOM AND CHRIS) TORMENT ME SO CRUELLY???
Ahem.
But still, you see my predicament? If only I'd gone back to school next week, then I could go over to Exeter and hear Absolution, and I wouldn't be slogging into school to study my AS Levels (by the way how old are you?) ... if only I hadn't gone to my cousin's wedding yesterday, I would've heard about this competition thingymajig.
Ach.
Maybe "looking suspicious" was an understatement, I doubt we stood out much. It was when we came back to Teddington that we did, some cyclists shouted "grungers!" at us, cause Ellie was wearing her floor length leather coat (I can't see any other explanation: we weren't looking particularly grungy). Also, my handcuffs provoked an amusing misunderstanding at a party the three of us went to, Ellie and I weren't feeling like party animals so we sat outside on a trampoline. Several of the guys came over, and I had a surreal conversation with one of them-
Him: "Are you two lesbians?"
Ellie: "We're close friends."
Him (knowingly): "Oh, yeah."
Me: "It's true! Stop fantasising."
Him: "I wasn't. Why are you wearing handcuffs?" (I was wearing one of the round bits round my wrist like a bracelet)
Me: "It's a fashion accessory."
Him: "You're so lesbians."
Me: "What? I find Matt Bellamy very attractive. And Ellie fancies Keanu Reeves. I told you, we're not lesbians."
Him: "Prove it."
-and then he wandered off, thankfully, after offering us the shed "if we wanted more privacy". Oh dear....
I don't seem to have particularly good experiences at large gatherings, for example at my cousin's wedding I suddenly felt incredibly depressed and wandered off to sit by a pond (the reception was at a mansion) and talked to one of my friends on the phone for a while, looking tragic.
Hey, it is wrong to hate other members of the human race, but Busted do not count in that category. They should be wiped off the face of the planet, for the good of the world.
By the way what IS Matt's favourite sexual position? It would be a good piece of information to inform Ellie, who is also a Muse Maniac (as one of our friends christened us). There is nothing wrong with going on about people you like at length. (I say this because I do it, quite often.) Have you seen the Hullabaloo video? Dom's Slipknot impression is not something that anyone should miss. Another, erm, highlight is Dom and Chris topless in the shower, if you happen to enjoy that kind of thing.
In Burger King they sell milkshakes that sparked off an existential discussion before I accidentally knocked it over. They're white, and all strawberry things are pink, right? SO, if this strawberry milkshake is white, is it still strawberry or indeed a milkshake?
A quandary to while away the tedium of Physics lessons...

Oh ... my gosh... said in a camp male-hairdresser accent ala my friend Andrew ... I have just found out that there was a competition to see Muse, and also there's an "exclusive album playback" of Absolution in a CD shop in Exeter tomorrow when I'm at SCHOOL! WHY DOES FATE (AND MATT, DOM AND CHRIS) TORMENT ME SO CRUELLY???
Ahem.
But still, you see my predicament? If only I'd gone back to school next week, then I could go over to Exeter and hear Absolution, and I wouldn't be slogging into school to study my AS Levels (by the way how old are you?) ... if only I hadn't gone to my cousin's wedding yesterday, I would've heard about this competition thingymajig.
Ach.
Maybe "looking suspicious" was an understatement, I doubt we stood out much. It was when we came back to Teddington that we did, some cyclists shouted "grungers!" at us, cause Ellie was wearing her floor length leather coat (I can't see any other explanation: we weren't looking particularly grungy). Also, my handcuffs provoked an amusing misunderstanding at a party the three of us went to, Ellie and I weren't feeling like party animals so we sat outside on a trampoline. Several of the guys came over, and I had a surreal conversation with one of them-
Him: "Are you two lesbians?"
Ellie: "We're close friends."
Him (knowingly): "Oh, yeah."
Me: "It's true! Stop fantasising."
Him: "I wasn't. Why are you wearing handcuffs?" (I was wearing one of the round bits round my wrist like a bracelet)
Me: "It's a fashion accessory."
Him: "You're so lesbians."
Me: "What? I find Matt Bellamy very attractive. And Ellie fancies Keanu Reeves. I told you, we're not lesbians."
Him: "Prove it."
-and then he wandered off, thankfully, after offering us the shed "if we wanted more privacy". Oh dear....
I don't seem to have particularly good experiences at large gatherings, for example at my cousin's wedding I suddenly felt incredibly depressed and wandered off to sit by a pond (the reception was at a mansion) and talked to one of my friends on the phone for a while, looking tragic.
Hey, it is wrong to hate other members of the human race, but Busted do not count in that category. They should be wiped off the face of the planet, for the good of the world.
By the way what IS Matt's favourite sexual position? It would be a good piece of information to inform Ellie, who is also a Muse Maniac (as one of our friends christened us). There is nothing wrong with going on about people you like at length. (I say this because I do it, quite often.) Have you seen the Hullabaloo video? Dom's Slipknot impression is not something that anyone should miss. Another, erm, highlight is Dom and Chris topless in the shower, if you happen to enjoy that kind of thing.
In Burger King they sell milkshakes that sparked off an existential discussion before I accidentally knocked it over. They're white, and all strawberry things are pink, right? SO, if this strawberry milkshake is white, is it still strawberry or indeed a milkshake?
A quandary to while away the tedium of Physics lessons...

Aaaah, sorry about that. The internet went beserk so I thought it hadn't worked, but instead it had posted twice. Hmmm.

Howdy,

Sorry about the lateness of my reply. I posted, sauntered off and didn't realise it hadn't posted. So. Now I have to say what I said all over again.

Well, this is my first full week of school. I've been back for well over 5 days and already I'm depressed. I don't think I've had such a bad week, ever, in my entire life. It's incredible. And to top it all off, my Dad didn't tape Muse in the Zenith. Super. Super bloody super.

How old am I? Gawd, about 15 going on 70. I'm 15 and 3/4. I love saying that. It's so very Adrian Mole, even though I hate Sue Townsend and I severely detested every Adrian Mole book she produced. Oh dear, I'm ranting.

Well well well, Matthew Bellamy's favourite position? I've probably got it wrong, Bob probably told me something completely different and I wasn't paying attention. Ahem. Well, apparently it's the girl on top facing away from him... I'm pretty sure those were Bobberts love struck words. *shrug* It has been a year since we last discussed Matthew, he then fell in love with Trent Reznor and since then... "Trent Trent Trent!" Ugh. Depressing. As much as I love Trent also. It's enough to make you throw up.

I wish I could elaborate on your milkshake theory, but I have a blinding headache and I need a bucket full of ice.
ta,
-Nate

I'm so ignorant. Who is Trent Reznor? I've never read the Adrian Mole books, I may at some point if I'm feeling bored. I'm 16 and one ninth, in case you wanted to know.
About the depressed feeling? I know how you feel. Are you like me in that you dislike people saying "I know how you feel"? Cause no one can properly KNOW, so to amend my statement, I can understand some of what you feel.
In fact, I was feeling quite similar last week, and especially on - Monday, I think - ach, I'm losing track of time already, it's pitiful, extraordinarily drained, depressed, bad.
Sooo, the way I got out of it, that time anyway, was talking to one of my friends? Even though I was being a not very good conversationalist (actually, not a conversationalist at all, I was just conversing in "mmm-hmmm" and "yeah") she persevered, cause although it sounds singularly ridiculous we have a "special bond" or whatever, and it helped. After a long time I felt more emotional. (That's how my bad-feelings tend to go: I go very empty, inhuman.)
If you don't have friends who can work these kinds of miracles, I can recommend acupuncture (which I have before, I think), talking to anyone about anything, being with a pet (unless it's a man eating giant eel, in which case you might want to stay away) or doing something creative. For example, I think I mentioned these stories my friends and I write, all of which are rather twisted (Ellie has two affairs and two semi-ones, one of the semi-ones is with my husband) but are fun to do.
Also you can listen to OK Go, who you might not have heard of but are a supremely cheerful band whose angriest song sounds like one of the most cheerful. Without being irritating. Trust me, one of my friends uses "cheerful" as an insult and she really likes them.
You could buy Time Is Running Out, the B side is excellent.
And take lots of baths, cause they're relaxing.
Try and focus on the impermanence of suffering, one of my friends watched Farscape when it was on, and there was a theory of a man strapped to a wheel. Sometimes he was squished in the road but other times he was looking at the sky, and that's how life works. (About the only worthwhile thing in Farscape, in my opinion.)
Hope that helps, and doesn't sound too cheesy.
Here is a virtual bucket of ice.

Trent Reznor is the lead singer of Nine Inch Nails, the band who helped me regain any sense of self worth I once had (it wasn't much). Also the man whose lyrics helped my friend get over some 'shocking' news concerning my personal life.

Yeah, I've heard of Ok Go. I liked one of their songs, uhm, 'Get over it'? Or something along those lines... My best friend suggests listening to Britney Spears when you're depressed. Ahem. Before you decide she needs to be killed, she likes Muse. Well. She likes Plug In Baby. Ahem. I'm never 100% sure with her.
I can't play mindlessly happy music when I'm depressed. It makes me cynical and I just end up feeling worse. I just tend to stick to songs with poetic lyrics and a nice guitar (or bagpipe) solo.
Give me a hot shower and Xfm anyday.

Ugh, sorry about the shortness. I'm being yelled at. Sigh. I'll finish this tommorow... *mutter* parents *mutter*

ta,
-Nate

Right, now where was I? Ah yes, complaining at great length how dull and depressing my life is.

Gosh yes. I hate people saying they know what I'm feeling, as they, well, don't have a clue. No, you didn't mention the stories. The only thing I have like that is mine and a friends comic strip. Matt Bellamy was in it once, but he was shot (not my idea might I add) but, in all fairness, so were many other people. It's a rather odd story line, but if you want to hear it, I'd be more than happy to tell it to you.

I tend to avoid talking when I'm depressed. For example, today I felt like absolute shit. I sat alone at lunch, sauntered around the school with my coat on and hood up (it's like my security blanket). One of my friends was concerned and followed me around for half an hour, asking me if I was OKAY. It just irritated me and I ended up hiding behind the textiles block. I then went back to the form room and ended up engaging in conversation with my oldest friends. They know me well enough to leave me alone. And I'll talk when I want to. Fairly simple. Works like a charm.

I like that theory, I think I'll have to steal it. It'll go on my list of possible IM names, in case I ever feel compelled to change mine yet can't think of anything to say. I've currently stolen some lyric or other from goodness knows who. In Extremo methinks. *shrug* I'm too lazy to check. I'm so tired I feel like I'm about to drop off to sleep at any minute... so if a load of random typings appear, I've fallen asleep on the keyboard.

If you'll exscuse me, I need to do some art homework then I intend to lie on the floor and try to listen to Showbiz without bursting into tears or smashing something.
Ta,
-Nate

Oh ... empathy vibes, I won't say "I know how you feel" but with the "are you OK" stuff, it sucks, I mean surely if someone is concerned enough to ask, then surely they're not OK. Overusing "surely" there. One of my friends, she is Ennegram Type Two, which basically means very generous and affectionate but sometimes overwhelmingly so, she often gets Concerned with a capital C and asks Ellie about the scratches on her arms in public, which needless to say isn't helpful.

Try not to smash things. Hmmm. Try and rephrase. Try not to smash yourself. Apparently punching pillows is good, or ripping up phone books. Just make sure you don't have any numbers you have to look up, or you will end up in the middle of a heap of shredded glossy paper looking sheepish.

In our stories, Matt's married to me and doesn't end up getting shot, he just had a semi affair with Ellie. Then she slept with Dom, but that wasn't cause she liked him, it was because she was trying to make Keanu jealous. See what I mean about twisted storylines? Go ahead and tell me your comic strip, it might distract you.

Feel free to steal the wheel theory, I think it's based on Buddhism, which says that suffering is a part of life but it's impermanent. I'm not religious but I'm fond of that principle.

Good luck with the homework, I didn't do Art for GCSE but several of my friends did and they said it wasn't pleasant, the workload was overwhelming. Is that the same for you? If so I can see why it wouldn't exactly help. Damn school!