h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

well I'm up for a three way <<>>

Large Privates you say, Detective?

Tell me more Sergeant Legbreaker.

Who would that be? The two of you and me? Or Leggy?

Or you, me and the huge private detective friend of Leggy?

I'm not sure what I can bring to this party.....

Probably better to stay at home, Leggy.

And Lara looks like such a nice girl...

Off you all go then. Don't worry about me. I'll just stay here and....and put my CDs in random order for a while....

I'm staying at home too. I have a headache. I have decided to spend the evening deciphering my Cocteau Twins' CDs. I have finished the first song and the lyrics go something like this:

Smersh aloboo heeehneeeh ufurr tara-ma-sa-la-taaa/Jabba smasha feckeroo lickeridoo ooh sleen/Aw sneffer uh dur hermer fnar/Eeeeesh neeesh alfalfa smerg a shmoo.

Poetry..

Well, that certainly puts a whole new perspective on Life. It would probably spoil things to know what the words were supposed to be...

I'm sure Lara & the private Dick will have a lovely time, anyway

So - which do you thinks works better - the Dictatorship or the Commune?

We could go for a, er, dictatorial commune?

Erm, something not quite right there...What do you think?

Hey - why not! Lets go for it.... we could have a different dictator every week... new rules.... new dress code.... when it's my turn it's going to Purple Leather PokaDot Pigamas..

For the boys as well as the girls?

I would introduce a special code for IVA Richards and would force him to wear a pink tutu on Fridays; and TartyGirl would have to wear a nun's habit at weekends - complete with chastity belt.

Not that I am malicious or anything.

And what about LLBBs? What would you clothe them in?

Why would I want to do that, Leggy?

Er, so you could take it off

I suppose that, in order to even things up and to supply some eye candy for the ladies, we should get Le*ers to put on a thong and come over here?

I propose also that when I come to power everyone should be forced to wear pink cords and ox-blood brogues.

Pink cords??? Is this some kind of ?

Yes - we want Legers in a Thong!!

Gasp!

Leggy, yes it is a bit kinky for most tastes.