h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

<>

Hey, good thing they aren't checking with us here then!

Reminds me a bit of when I did Weight Watchers stuff in my mid-twenties (though I wasn't half as FAT then as I am now! In fact I was quite thin then but just thought I was FAT). It was the weekly meetings and public weighing-in sessions that kept me on the diet for shame of being told in front of a group that I hadn't lost a speck of weight during the past week.

I guess if that works, then it works. Looking back, it seems a rather negative way to go about it. The whole 'shame factor'. And no, I'm not trying to rain on your parade at all, as I think you will probably do very well with this programme and achieve your goal. Though I can't help but thinking that you are totally gorgeous just the way you are.

az

The shame factor does help if combined with actually wanting to get to your goal, it is bad when people are trying to lose for the wrong reasons though. For me it is just some extra incentive and extra support which is all

"Though I can't help but thinking that you are totally gorgeous just the way you are"

well thank you. If I was happy like this then I wouldn't bother, but I'm not. I feel *so* much better after getting the first five stone off, really appreciate how my body works. I can imagine how it would feel to actually be fit, and not encumbered by all of this excess flesh - am really looking forward to it!

az, if any of the pictures in your gallery are in any way recent, then I wouldn't say you were fat at all!

But hey, it is the weekend. Up to anything exciting?

Fathom - Damn! I have just realised that my picture in the gallery can confirm who I am! Do you really want to sit through all that Discovery health stuff though? My friend tells me that they seem to show endless programs showing childbirth in all its glorious, gory detail

Hi Kelli,

No, surfing Discovery Health is not one of my key pastimes. Discovery Home & Leisure or Discover Wings is more my scene. Yes, they do go in for the childbirth scenes a bit and I was never cut out to be a gynea.. gynae.. gynac.. midwife.



F

Yeah, Kelli, of course I know.

People keep telling me I am 'looking good' even though I have massive ham-hocks for upper arms hanging off my shoulders and my belly sits on my lap like *this thing* and I have thighs like tree trunks and a bottom like...like... like this really huge bottomy thing!

How is this even remotely attractive? Oh, I forgot - I have a 'pretty' face.

Well, of course, except for my disintegrating jawline and other flabby things happening face-wise.

The only photo in the gallery that is recent is the one of me holding my cat Sunny, taken last December. Wearing a huge baggy sweater. The first one of me wearing my fave 'sangria dress' was taken five years and thirty pounds ago. The drunken smiling photo with me wearing specs was taken about three years ago.

Whatever.

Question Kelli - have you ever been really thin? I'm just curious.

az

Oh hello Fathom - remember me?

az

Have I ever been thin? No. At least not since I was a child, and I was a chunky child. Not exactly fat then but never slim. I remember with school sports I was relatively sporty, in that I was reasonably good at things, but never really fit. I was always strong rather than graceful (preferred karate to ballet), and was overweight pretty much when I hit my teens.

More than half my life, and certainly all of my adult life.

Whoah. That was a thread killer,

Anyway -> F74563?thread=433574

No, not a thread killer at all, Kelli. Given that this is my chat thread with Fathom and *he* is not participating *AT ALL* I would say that he is the guy responsible for killing any sense of *why should I be keeping this thread going except for I like the subject title???*

Meanwhile, holy Jesus F**k girl! That sounds so weird. Are you really sure you want to do this? Can you get out of it if you don't like it?



az

Can't get out of it now, I signed all the paperwork yesterday *gulp* Got the fiance to read it because I was all over the place.

It does sound good, before I signed they assured me they won't be making me wear anything skimpy or do anything I am uncomfortable with. Discovery are not the kind of channel to do the 'humiliate the participant' style of tv anyway but I am happy about it now.

I am incredibly glad that I decided to gym in the morning yesterday, rather than after work. The thought that they might have jumped out at me when I was purple and sweaty and wearing my crappy gym stuff is too much to bear!

I think I will end up very disillusioned about the whole tv surprise thing though. After they ambushed me on the doorstep (that really was a surprise) they then got me to drive down the road a couple of times and get out of the car and go into the house so they could pretend that they had secretly filmed that bit from the neighbours gardens. I'd have seen them if they had really done that

Not forgetting you unoffical lurker

So when does all this start, Kelli? Or has it already?

az

It hasn't started yet, I have my first consultation with Ian Marber on the 23rd June, a week and a half away.

It finishes on the 1st September, 10 weeks later.

I've got over the initial shock now and am really looking forward to it

Hi az,



Sorry if you've missed me (although I can't imagine why you would); I've been away for a few days.



It's been really busy at w*rk on the days I have been here and my wife has been using the computer at home doing some research so I've not got on there either.



How is you, man?

And why is it suddenly necessary to remind everyone you is not a man? Did I miss something while I was away?

I'll just have a little look round to see what's happening. Catch you later.

F

Fathom!!!

Hi stranger. You mean after all this time you couldn't come up with better excuses than that?

It turns out that a few people on the photo gallery thread were surprised to find out a was a girly. Not sure how to take that, atchly. Anyhow, am mostly keeping the brackets up until zoomer sees it.

Must go to w*rk now.

az

Obviously they haven't looked at the photos.

(OO)
) . (
( y )




F

az

Well, that was a conversation stopper.

F

Ha! Well, that's cos your little 'drawing' wasn't lumpy enough. Yesterday morning I ran into an old student of mine that I hadn't seen for at least five years or more (since before my op). And her very first comment to me was - 'My god but you are FAT now! I mean REALLY FAT! What happened to you???' So you see, it is not my imagination that I am fat and lumpy.

Of course, being much more polite than this ex-student I didn't say to her - 'Why Inés, you look so much more haggard and wrinkled since the last time I saw you! Whatever has happened to *you*???'


az

'Strewth az, I'm sure you're an excellent English teacher but you need to teach them some manners too. When you ran into this ex-student you should have been driving a truck. How can anyone be so rude?



My little drawing was prompted by your reference to the brackets you had added to your name and your mention of being a "girly". Girly and brackets reminded me of a schoolboy joke. I thought it came over quite well given the limitations of plain text. I'm not sure lumpy is possible:

{oo}
{ . }
{ v }

Certainly not as amusing is it?

Anyway, less of the weight obsession. What's happening with you? Are you OK?

F

Actually the 'lumpy' version is more like the reality, but okay, I'll stop obsessing about my body (for now . . .)

What's happening? Well, next week Blues Shark and Strange Little Girl will be here for their holidays. And in September Noggin is also coming for a visit. So I'm quite looking forward to all that.

This summer I need to start working on some IDEAS - ways to change a few things in my life to create some semblance of security. These past ten years of living hand-to-mouth have quite worn me out and so some changes need to made. Of course I've also been saying that for the past ten years but, um, this time I *really* mean it!!!

What are your summer plans?

az