h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/F19585?thread=3645540 "Well, I'm blind in one eye, but I don't think that counts" Or, is he serious The last time I jumped in with a comment, some folk got uppity. Your turn

H'lo! Butting in from the info page here. Been browsing about and just seen that thread!

Are you thinking 'Soul Man'? Chuck a bit of colour on your face and get that minority vote. Better if he was a blind, coloured lesbian, but you can't have everything, can you?

I've got nothing positive to say to him unfortunately, but he paints such a picture. I would suggest a career as the next Woody Allen.

Is he Jewish? There's a minority for you!!!

I'd typed the first line of a witty reposte, then thought better of it. I could feel the cold, clammy, breeze of a HARRRUMPHHH on my shirt collar.

I thought it was a genuine ASK til the bit about the ocular deficiency, now i can't see it.

I wanted to say;


Which craft room?.


But you know how the hurrumphing old blowhards hate us abusing the ASK thread

Now, how come *I* just got a slap for that?

I generally wait until a serious answer first before the smart arse one. Or, I wait for someone like you to go first so at least I can say "It wasn't me who started it Miss".

BTW, I really liked your comment about prisons the other day, changing from bein a place for punishment to a place that is the punishment. Many a true word spoken in jest.

You know.......i wondered why only you took the abuse too. I was just as mouthy, and even directly insulted one of the Hootoo leg ends.
I've decided it's because you probably challenge them on an intellectual level, and they REALLY don't like that. I'm a minor annoyance.

I still think one of the funniest posts I've ever seen on HooToo was when one of the leg ends specifically addressed me for the first time to say he wouldn't speak to me.

I fell off my chair at that one

"I've never spoken to you, and have no intention of doing so" FLOUNCE.

I notice our beloved leg ends also like going;

Unsub// and flouncing off, only to return 2 posts later to continue telling people why they no longer read that particular thread

Stars every one.

Remember the British Gas adverts with the guy out of the Fast Show playing the old alcoholic?

That's the mental image I have of our more venerable members. That and Dads Army.

Rowley Birkin QC .........yeah, that's them.


Paffle, flibble wopper...House rules.....pashtinker muggle warmlyman......Heh, heh, heh, TRUMBLE ....of course, i was very, very, holier than thou at the time.

I like being a middle-aged teenage rebel, pricking the balloons of pomposity.

As for challenging them intellectually, , not sure about that. I just wait until their circular arguments are about to disappear up their backsides then inject a teensy bit of real life.

Ah.......that'll be the secret of your popularity then

You do bring out some of their very finest tub-thumping and chest-beating. It often sounds like the percussion section of an orchestra is dogging your footsteps.

*Waits for 'Dogging' to get yiksed*

Hey, I got "faggot" yikesed the other day Even though I was talking about bundles of wood for burning.

To be fair, a lot of them see the world as they'd like it to be not as it actually is.

Ooh - Graham Norton's just come on. I got a mention on his 2nd show after e-mailing in a gag.

I'm impressed. Actually, he's not what he was, but there are worse.

I once got mentioned on 'The News Huddlines'......but so did 75% of Britain at some point

My brother-in-law's a great writer. He's had gags & sketches accepted for everything from Not the Nine o'Clock News to Spitting Image and Little Britain. He wrote a play about a women's football team that was too funny. You were so busy laughing at one gag that you missed the next two.

When i say mentioned.......it was a restraining order

So comedy runs throughout your family then? Obviously Mrs. SWL has a well developed sense of humour

That's something else our guardians don't like. Humour......they can't do it.

There's a real problem with humour here. HooToo does silly and childish very well, but dry wit doesn't come across well. I think the reader reads a post in the state of mind they are in at that time. If they're feeling defensive, dry wit can easily be misconstrued as an attack.

What I *should* do is check who's posting before I start, but that takes away the spontaneity.

I really appreciate a quick retort. It doesn't need to necessarily be good. Speed of response is a virtue in itself.

It's a pity you seem to be quicker off the mark than me at times