h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi CG,

You posted whilst I was typing, so I didn't say 'hello' and if it appears that I was being rude I'm sorry although I have no need to apologise because it wasn't my fault anyway, but if I have offended you I AM sorry.

Shoulder? The usual. I fell and the shoulder was sandwiched between 14 stones of male lumpen mass and the rock-hard ground.

How's you? Lou's been busy, hasn't she?

I'm not offended!

sounds painful - nothing broke I take it.

Indeed the Chopsy one has been busy - I hope she stays around

Hope the pain eases asap - the Chelsea Witch prescribes !!!

Good morning magster...do I detect jealousy in your spiteful hurtful ramblings?? It will get you nowhere

No big words today, however I have learned that tracey shaw is a husband beater, The NOTW has sent out 2000000 yellow ribbons and Gwyneth and Chris had a row..now, do you get class stories like that in that rag you read?? Precisely..

Who is Tracey Shaw, Lou? Is she a 'popular music' performer?

Nothing broken, CG. It just means that I won't have to play cricket for a while.

It's too bleedin' cold for 'summer sport'.

Good afternoon Chelsea, Alistair and the Chopsy one

Chelsea I was truly saddened to hear of your problems with the lap top. Is resorting to vodka wise when electric are involved? Glad to see you back though. By the way, when you borrowed my sofa you left a lot of voddie empties. I had to do a special trip to the bottle bank . Rub some aloe vera into the sunburn and get Mr CG to rub it better for you.

Alistair, I am sorry about your shoulder. Let me kiss it better for you.
No I wasn't that drunk when I wrote all that, just slightly tipsy.

Chopsy, you know I am not jealous it's just that with you I feel that I can let rip and say exactly as I like because you will throw something twice as bad back. Take it as a compliment . Who is Tracey Shaw?

Have a lovely day everyone. I am off to me moms for good food, good wine and lots of family. I don't know whether to laugh or

"popular music"??? Good god alistair how old are you, you sound like my mother! Anyway, for you and that old fart Mags:

Tracy Shaw used to be in Corrie, she was Maxine Peacock and got bashed over the head by tricky dickie and died, leaving hubby Ashley to bring up baby Josh alone...you really don't watch Corrie?

Magster - sorry about leaving my empties - how rude of me (why don't they have a smiley!

Tracy Shaw is a leading light in the Brit Art of getting murdered on a soap....I think...don't take this as gospel though!

Hope you have good time Magster - s'pect there might be a bit of but a lot of too....not to mention the .....(they don't have a vodka smiley either...)

They've all gone CG

Glad I'm not the only saddo stuck at home... I come from a broken home you know...these times of year are always difficult I was 27 at the time mind you and my mother is a very bitter woman I think of myself as a bit of a Bridget Jones but with hub and kids

How worrying

Don't worry Chopsy - I don't think it's sad in the least - I am a bit of a recluse at heart and I have no worries about not doing the family thing - it's only another day!

My youngest daughter is here - but watching TV and my partner is out there, selling our quite atrocious 'art works' to unsuspecting grokkles.
I am meant to be painting and am, every so often, dabbing a bit of colour here and there!

Thank god..I'm not weird! We never do anything!!! Live in the middle of nowhere, see mum and in-laws about 3 times a year (in Scotland) and see my dad when I want something

Find family clelebrations horrifying although I have a 50th b'day party to go to next month in the local legion (oh the class!) and it will be vast quantities of v.cheap voddy on

Can't comment on anything remotely artistic, have trouble writing my name, never mind drawing something

god it's freezing isn't it?!

I remember Maxine! She was the fox with the long wild hair, and she always struck me as being a bit 'dirty'.

I am quite a fan of popular beat music, thank you Lou. That Bill Haley is a bit of a wild man, though, but Buddy Holly is still my favourite.

Al you are unbelievable Do you have tickets to see her with her kit off in "The Blue Room"?

I can't see the attraction myself

Hi everybody,

hope you are all happily ensconced with your various families, etc.

At the moment I am watching something very intellectually challenging on TV i.e. a load of Carry On clips . However there is hope for me yet as later I am going to see Far from Heaven with a Nice Young Man. Well, a bloke, anyway.

See you later.

Good evening ladies

Well, I'm watching The Simpsons, drinking a rough bottle of and eating a huge egg

I'm afraid I've never watched Coronation Street, so I've no idea what any of you are talking about

BTW Hello louloubelle, always nice to hear from a Daily Mail reader (I know you are an endangered species, after all)



peter

No, Lou, but that's one good reason (or, more to the point, two good reasons) to go and see her in the theatre.

I would like to go on record and say that I love the Daily Mail because my uncle writes for it and I am hoping he will get me a job there in the not-too-distant future.

Venal? Moi? Not a chance!

Good evening gentlemen!

Peter thank you, what a nice place this is

I have so far munched my way through a mingles egg and am about to tackle some strawberry vienetta. The voddy will be coming out soon ...I have just read the MoS and am concerned that my house price has fallen because of all the asylum seekers

Alistair I could not possibly drink safeways own vodka it is vile, only smirnoff or absolut for lou. Tracy Shaw is a trollop!

Alistair...what does the "W" stand for?

"Writer", of course