h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, anybody that was watching my last journal will know that elderly relative died last night and that was more less that.

A happy release, I think.

McKay mentioned that bedside vigils are part of our humanity. My daughter asked me why we do it a couple of years ago when my sister died. She wondered why we stayed at the hospital when there were nurses and doctors already there. Reasonable enough question from a child. It caused me to think about why. I mean it's not as if we could actually do anything to help so the only thing I could come up with was that we were there just to let the person know that they weren't alone. If they should open their eyes they'd see someone who loves them. If they could hear us they'd hear comforting words from a familiar voice. If they were frightened they'd know we'd be holding their hand and making sure they were treated properly.

That was the best I could do then and it's still the best I can do now. I've sat with four close family members while they made that final journey and each one took a slightly different route but they all went with someone they loved and who loved them beside them. Is that part of our humanity?

Probably.

I went to work today perhaps too soon. I was very tired and very sensitive when a colleague ripped into me for a minor oversight. The fact that I also deal day in day out with the sick and with those people who are going through what elderly relative and family have just come through also led me to think maybe I should have a day or two off.

I was granted a couple of days annual leave and a one day bereavement leave.

I think I'll relax.

Wise thing to do, luv....

Have no experience of witnessing the passing of a loved one fizzy, so can't offer any intelligent insight into your speculation. I wonder, however, if it varies depeding upon them and depending on you. Some people have this fixation that, when they are on an aeroplane, they have to concentrate at all times on 'flying' the plane and if they are distracted it will crash. Perhaps this irrational beleief in an ability to control stems from a fustrating lack of control when it matters so much?

I agree with you. I've sat with relatives and it's been a bonding experience for our family as well as comforting for us to know they are peaceful.

I think we also then know that there was nothing we could do - they didn't call out for us and we weren't there - they passed with dignity and with someone holding their hand.