h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

::Tries to play JANG JANG on the guitar and fails miserably::
WAH-WAH-WAH-WAH-WAH-WAH tiny purple ..

Weeeeeoooow wah wah wheeew, wah wah wheeew, wah wha wah wah wooooooow wah widdly widdly widdly widdle widdle I'll name that tune in three bob.

Name that tune!

I think yours was Swalbr, and I know mine was the solo from White Room

No
Tiny purple fishes run laughing through your fingers........etc
......till you touch the distant shore with Tales of Brave Ulysses how his naked ears were tortured...etc.

White Room

Mistadrong, that was VERY naughty of you, bringing that bomb over to Click over there disguised as a welcome home ........luckily it didn't do too much damage.........

Silly you
That wasn't a bomb, it was a bombe

That explains why the explosion was so small, but not why it scorched the carpet! Still, pheloxi* brought me a new one. So that's alright then, isn't it?

No wonder I had such indegestion after I ate mine.
Good old pheloxi

One day, I will learn to look at Track listings on my Albums. (I was right, I was just confused again)

Confusion is eminently acceptable so that means you get the star prize
A genuine note taken from a live performance of Badge.

::Glamorous babe brings on the prize in a ...::
::Opens the and hands over the ::

Confusion eh? Did you know that I am the Keeper of confusion, misunderstandings and mayhem?

::looks around approvingly at all the mayhem. Puts on a CD by Whitehouse then s away, cackling gleefully::

Never Forget Death....how apt

::Puts on Manu Chao just to cause confusion::

Decides to just be the confusion

Makes the sound of 100 left hands clapping.

cl X100

::decides to join PS in becoming a Guru of Confusion::

::Hangs a sign outside the Ashram::

The Gurus of Confusion are in.

::Sits with PS to wait for seekers of confusion to arrive::

* looks in, wonders,Nah,looks away*
*Don`t need any more confusion, already got plenty*

::Realises that what the Ashram needs is some mystical and catchy sayings::

::Paints one on the board outside::

Confusion say. The longest journey begins with a single sock.

There that should bring them in.

Tip-toes past Plastic Squirrel who is in a deep state of confusion.

*Do Not Disturb*