h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Currently listening to: Myself humming 'Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head' "- But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turning red, crying's not for me...' I always get in such a good mood because of that song

It's okay, I've calmed down now *Breaths restrained and gasps occasionally* The shock and pride overpowered me there for a moment Move along, nothin to see here, Tilly is back to her usual, boring self.

I finally bought 'The Queen of the Damned' today - and the cover's even more awful! Not only did they include Sting's quote on the earlier book, but they also quoted Publishers Weekly, saying, "[...] and with sensuality verging on erotica" Excuse me?! I'm getting seriously embarassed carrying around a book saying that on the cover Even worse was it when my father was curious about what book I had been wishing for for so long now, and he turned pale when he read the quotes on the back... I tried humorously to add, "ah, it seems like none of these have even read the books...", but I think he didn't believe me

Today I downloaded a programme for manipulating graphics, from the internet. I think it's called SmartDraw or something. I'm having so much fun with it I can't quit! To make a long story short, all three of my Neopets will be contestants in the next Beauty Contest starting on Monday...

I noticed there was a big writeup in the Norwegian newspaper VG today, about the making of the Red Dragon movie... I'll try to translate some of it for you :
"For the third time, Anthony Hopkins plays the madman Hannibal 'the cannibal' Lecter. Hopkins himself is also known for his temperament, as he said in 1998 that he should quit as an actor foor good. Appearantly, he changed his mind." And some blah blah blah about the personal life of some other actors... "The action of Red Dragon occurs before The Silence - and Hannibal, so this is reportedly years before he first hisses the famous 'What did you see, Clarice, what did you see?'-line." Blah Blah Blah, Manhunter, Blah... "Brett Ratner have said that 'Hopkins won't be the charming Hannibal from the Silence - or the totally mad Hannibal from Hannibal - But he is very, very angry indeed!'."

There you see - as the newspapers here didn't do a write-up on this before now, how could I have possibly have known if you hadn't told me? There's a rather nice picture from the production, too.

I better go now. I did some digging and I *did* find the picture of the dear cannibal licking a certain steering wheel I won't torture you anymore, so I'm going to send it to you right away...

Toodles!

Currently listening to: a peice of music on the radio. I'm not quite sure what it is or whom it's by, but that's ignorance for you. If you wanna listen too it's: http://www.jazzfm.com

WHAT! *runs and checks her copy of Queen Of The Damned* Nooooo! My god, I've got the same copy! *cries*
It reads: "Pulses with menace, mystery and violence, and with a sensuality verging on erotica" Thankyou very much Publishers Weekly

Thankee! I'll look forward to that picture, in fact I may not even go to sleep with anticipation and excitement. In fact I may just sit here positively wetting myself with excitement! Phew, all this excitement!

My Dad came in and saw me typing up the name Micheal Ball. He thought I was finally starting to exhibit good taste in men (It turns out my Dad is somewhat of a fan) and told me there's an interview with him in the paper somewhere.. or somthing similar. I'm going to check this out later for you

My Mum is really getting on my nerves! She's sitting on the sofa using an electric sharpener to sharpen pencils It's really loud and if she carries on I'm going to go and sit in the garden. That sounds rather nice actually, maybe I'll take a packed lunch with me (Well, a packed midnight snack) and a sleeping bag. Now she's having a go at me for not helping. I think I'm going to go and get the sleeping bag...

Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Currently listening to: Sidney Poitier on the telly...

I gotta go check out that link, but not now - mum and dad hates it when I listen to anything while they're watching a movie ...

You're father is somewhat of a fan, eh? Perhaps I have been teaming up with the wrong member of the family ... Is he seeing anyone, your dad? Oh, that's right, that would be your mum . - Kidding! Kidding... *Throws up hands in a serious manner* Gee, that would be weird, wouldn't it? But to more serious matter: Do you still have that newspaper somewhere? Remember, I was kind enough to translate all VG said about Hopkins/Lecter I gotta know what that interview is about!! Could you at least say what newspaper it is? Eh, Nate? Buddy? *Makes sad puppy face*

This was a very small message, I know, but I'm getting kinda tired and there's an interesting movie on the telly... It's 'Sneakers'. Ive watched it before, but I can't remember anything from it... Except that I really, really liked the bad guy, so I better go and see what that was about

Toodles!

P.S.: Have you recieved the e-mail yet?

Currently listening to: The dialogue of 'It's Only TV But I Like It' Jonathan Ross is really starting to bug me !!

*looks cross* I'd rather not think about you and my Dad. I've grown rather attatched to my Mum, and it'd be weird with you as my step-mam. *shudders at the thought* You're very nice and all but I'd rather have you as a friend..

I'll try to find it (It seems to have gone walk about) and if there's anything interesting i'll either scan it in or write it up in an e-mail or on h2g2. Whatever makes the most sense at the time

YES! I did get the e-mail, you'll see my full hysterical response in the reply I sent you. Thanks soo much! You made my day/month/year/century etc! I'm gonna print it out and use it to scare people with I'm terrible aren't I?

I'm going to bed now, to dream of Hannibal Lecter, chocolate and Lestat I'm certainly 'unique'

Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

PS. Thankyou for the picture!
PPS. In the caption contest was it Mark Moxon who was drunk?

Currenlty listening to: The bubbly sound and my mother snoring (Wow! Two usual sounds at once!)

Hm. Jonathan Ross, eh? I've listened to him sometimes on Radio 2. He can appeal to my weird sense of humour now and then, but the biggest reason I listen to him is because I've heard he's a good friend of Michael's ... My oh my, so shallow...

So you coulnd't print 'The Picture' out because your mum was in the room and I quote you "don't want her thinking she has a sick minded daughter..."? Poor lady, she doesn't know yet? I think it's time to tell her.

And now, you must start paying me back - it wasn't easy to track down that photo since it was ages ago I first saw it on some Phantom of the Opera-message board I was lurking on (I was quite fascinated how Phantom fans was so often Hannibal fans too. I think it has something to do with the "elegant killer"-type. You know, Gentleman Death ) *Dons a hypnotic voice* Bring... me... the... newspaper! And possibly the man himself too, now that you owe me, the Almighty One, everything Ooh, the rush of power floating in my veins..!

I agree, you are very unique Who would dream of a hyper-intelligent cannibal, chokolate and a world famous vampire, eh? Ooh, and maybe all at once? (Dang, my brain exploded - overstimulated)

Talking of sleep, I didn't last night I don't know why, each time I went to sleep I had weird nightmares that, when I finally woke up, only made me puzzled. Example, I dreamed some Christian league was camping in my back yard in order to "save" me. When I threatened with calling the police the ruined my phone Why on earth would I dream that?!

Oh, I read in the newspaper today how you should be "hip" this summer (I don't know why, since I don't care if I'm "so unhip it's a wonder my bum doesn't fall off" ) Nonetheless, I read that sixpences was very modern and cool right now, so guess who walks around in such a fashionable state ? I've worn it all year, but finally it's considered as a cool thing to do... Yay.

I'm so tired right now I wonder if I shall go and join my mum and sleep on the couch And remember: Bring me the newspaper...

Oh, I just saw that you're listed as one of the Researchers with the Longest Postings in 24 Hours on the h2g2 Statistics page! Congratulations!

"If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day."
-John A. Wheeler

"The future will be better tomorrow."
-Dan Quayle

Currently listening to: Jazz fm, I don't really listen to anything else. I'm pretty sad.. The song is 'Keep reminding me' by Phil Perry

*stands up and walks like a mummy towards the door* Bring Tilly newspaper, bring Tilly newspaper, bring Tilly newspaper

*looks sheepish * It appears my Dad has thrown it out. I tried looking everywhere for it (I even looked in the massive bin outside ) but I can't find it. I asked my Dad what it was about and he said "Oh, just a bio. Why do you want it so badly?" I presume you know all there is to know about Micheal so there seemed little point in searching for it further. I pressed my Dad for info and he said it was all about Chitty chitty.. and his career up til then. Nothing earth shattering, sorry about that *grovels for forgiveness* Please forgive me!

I'd rather not tell my Mother that I'm infatuated with a serial killer, it may put a dampner on our relationship Come to think of it, she'd probably call in a preist (or an exorcist) and never let me talk to you again.. but if you're sure you want me to tell her I did print it out in the end (when they went out) and it's inside my school diary along with the others Get me help!!!

I've gotta go and wrap my best friends present, it's her party in an hour. I left it a bit late... I'd better go and do it really quickly! Sorry this is so short (My recognition for typing such long messages is now at an end ) bye for now,
Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

I'm baaack! I begged for extra time and surprisingly I got it! Anyway, here is the continuation of my reply:

NATE'S DREAM ANALASIS :

*puts on a Sigmund Freud like voice* Ziz is clearly a plea for attention, ze patient iz experienzing strange dreams in vich Christians come and bozer her *Bother her* I zink *I think* zat ze child needz to spend a short time in a church to szhow her *show her* zat her fear of Christians iz, how you say, all in zer ead *all in her head* Zat should immediately zort *sort* ze problem..

I'm so umhip (see I can't even spell it correctly) that my bum HAS fallen off! Lookee *shows Tilly* I don't like wearing fashionable clothes, they itch. I just wear what I happen to feel comfortable in, if it's in fashion then I'll be darned!

I will definately marry an elegant killer when I'm older. It'll give me somthing to do. Hiding all those dead bodies is a full time job, but I will take time to stay in for romantic meals of fava beans and a nice chianti

Well, my time is up. I'd better go or I will get a thick lip Help! Call childline... only joking

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Currently listening to: The 'Nikita'-serie on the telly...

Hmm. Okay, I will think about forgiving you... But only if you tell me this: Was there a really jummy picture with it? If it was, prepare to feel the wrath of Tilly

Yay! I just heard my mum, dad and I are going to the local swimming hall tomorrow! Yayayay! Maybe I shall finally don the cape and all, if you remember our very eccentric conversation some weeks ago

Hm. Dr Freud, eh? I think I looked through some book by him on dream analyzis. Let me do a summary: If you dream of trains, it's about sex. If you dream of ducks, it's about sex. If you dream about a person you hate, it's about sex. If you dream about elegant, middle-aged cannibals, it's about sex. If you dream about sex... no one knows exactly what it is about . Gee, do we see some sort of a pattern here?

You know, someone asked me the other day "What is the greatest moment captured on film in history?" And I've thought it through. In all movies that have made me cry , laugh , jump with excitement and turn off the TV in disgust , there surely must be one scene that differs from the rest? And I found my answer: Gene Kelly in the 'Singin' in the Rain' from Singin' in the Rain. How can you not melt by that scene Strangely enough, the movie is not one of my favourits, but that scene... is beyond words. Besides, I think Gene Kelly was a major stud when he was young Perfect body, perfect voice, perfect everything...

Got a favourite scene from a movie yourself? I can come up with some believable answers in your case

I can't think of much more to write. That's the problem with vacation - so little happens daily... Well, tell me how the party went Toodles!

"Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better."
-Andre Gide

"Another unsettling element in modern art is that common symptom of immaturity, the dread of doing what has been done before."
-Edith Wharton

Currently listening to: jazz fm, the only station online that plays half decent music I don't work for them or anything (subliminal message- listen to jazz fm, listen to jazz fm, listen to jazz fm!)

That had to be the most awkward social event I've ever been to. I knew one person out of the 7 and everyone else were best friends, I tried to make conversation I really did! But oddly enough nobody cared much about Hannibal, or The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy.. Ahh well, I've just managed to improve my loser status by three whole points.

Do you think Dr Freud was just a dirty old man with too much time on his hands? Did he ever marry? Was he ever a psyco killer? I think not... how jolly uninteresting . Although some of his work is quite impressive, I fail to see the merit in some of his other theorys

Yes I do remember our very eccentric convo from before. I don't think I shall be donning my cape anytime soon. I've still got another week of school We have MORE exchange students coming on Monday, these one's are from France. More people to scare! They have to sit through the most boring lessons; Geography, History (Ok, it's just the teacher), Latin (That won't be too bad, it's our last lesson so we do nothing), Tennis (I don't like the idea of these French lads watching us as we run about in short shorts ) and Science

My favourite movie scene? Ooh! I'll have to think about that one. I'll tell you when I get back (we're going out again) Oh, I didn't tell you! We're going to The Tate Modern, where I hope to get a print of anything by Salvidor Dali. Got to go, my parents need hepl getting all our stuff together. Speak to you later,

Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Currently listening to: My father preparing meatloaf

Listen to Jazz FM, listen to Jazz FM, listen to Jazz FM ... You know, I have this strange want to listen to Jazz FM. T'is probably nothing, though

Ah, I myself, when at an awkward social event, always try to turn up to awkwardness even more "If you can't beat it, join it" - You score a lot of Weirdo points on it... That reminds me, today I was wearing the only dress I own, and I said to my mother: "*Sigh* You know, it's so incredible hard to be eccentric when you're wearing a dress..." and my mother just nodded and we kept on walking, when suddenly it dawned on me: "- Unless your a guy, of course!" And the answer seemed so simple and hilarious at the time, so we just laughed and laughed

I've just come home from the swimming hall... Every part of me aches Aow, aow... I'm too old for this. - And I didn't use the cape by the way. I think one of the guards said it was dangerous and could suffocate me or other guests

My head hurts enormously - I think I'll have a lie down somewhere. Toodles!

Currently listening to: nothingness, the empty hollow sound of my life, passing away like a plate of choc chip cookies.. mmm, cookies

Well, I did get my Salvador Dali poster. If I tell you what it's called will you promise not to speculate as to why I bought it? Promise? It's called (I picked this completely based on the drawing itself you understand) 'Autumnal Cannibalism' I had no idea at the time, my Dad looked at me a bit oddly when I showed him what I was going to buy.

I thought about it long and hard and I came to two conclusions:
1. One of the best scenes ever is when Hannibal Lecter reaches out to hand Clarice her notes back at their hands meet
2. and the other is the bit in East Is East where the dog is chasing those women out of the house I was in stitches...

It was really hot today. I had stupidly chosen my outfit to be, a rugby shirt, long socks (up to my knees) and my baggiest heaviest trousers! I'm so thick sometimes It wasn't too bad actually, I got a bit of a tan on my arms (I rolled up the sleeves) and I got a lot of walking done. I'm so tired I think I may not bother getting up and going to school tommorow

It's the French exchange! Wahoo! This is the first time I'm going to meet any of them properly, all the rest are told to steer clear of me and go around me in the halls. But Claire (She's one of the crazies who think's I'm great in the pictures) promised, somewhat stupidly in my opinion, to introduce me to her French exchange. I'll get to scare the poor dear. I'll tell you if she wet herself tommorow...

I had exactly the same problem last time I went swimming!! Isn't it strange that people won't let you wear your cape in the swimming pool? I'll be darned! 'Health hazard' this and 'Are you crazy' that. Some people don't know what a good time is

What's wrong with guys wearing dresses? *looks innocent* The Scots wear kilts, isn't that the same thing? It's late and I'm getting confused. I'd better go and put my Hannibal picture (the wheel one ) in my bag to show off tommorow and then go to sleep..

Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Currently listening to: Two bubbly sounds Well, we've just installed the real aquarium (it's gigantic, by the way) and we plan to put the punchbowl-fishies into it soon

Well, if you're going to show the steering wheel picture to anyone, keep in mind to tell them who got it for you I've always wanted to have a bit of reputation places I've never been...

And suuure you bought the poster just for the picture Quite right, quite right... M-hmm. (And lots of other doubting noises) Only kiddind I wonder if I shall do some research on the net and see what this picture is about.

Speaking of kilts, I find them absolutely adorable! But that may be because I've always liked guys with a feminine touch ... And that a certain Mr Ball has been seen sporting one I said I liked feminine guys, but believe me; Tine is much worse! She can get a crush on a guy solely because he is gay. Imagine that. So if Tine was the emperor of the world, you can see why the planet would be doomed... I have such a weird family...

Well, this will be a famously short posting because, well, I'm leaving on another one of my mini-vacations today. To the mountain village Skei, as we do every summer. Believe me; There's nothing to do there, except climbing the mountain and studying the local moose (which you can't help but do - last year one of them put its head through my bedroom window and just watched me A very creepy moose indeed) I'll probably bring a lot of books.

Well, water the plants, feed Roosta and the strange, little, furry, longlegged thing that lives in the wall, don't sell my property on the black market before a WHOLE WEEK have passed, and remember I'm scheduled to come home on Wednesday

Toodles!

"Be sure that it is not you that is mortal, but only your body. For that man whom your outward form reveals is not yourself; the spirit is the true self, not that physical figure which and be pointed out by your finger."
-Marcus Tullius Cicero

"If you aspire to the highest place, it is no disgrace to stop at the second, or even the third, place."
-Marcus Tullius Cicero

Currently listening to: Do I really need to tell you? (Another subliminal message- listen to jazz fm, listen to jazz fm, listen to jazz fm!)

Another lovely message for you to read when you get back, and I promise not to sell (anymore of) your stuff A small peice of advice: BEWARE OF THE MOOSE, THEY ARE EVIL COLD BLOODED KILLERS AND WILL KILL YOUR FAMILY AND DO ANYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO GET YOU OUT OF THEIR WAY! BEWARE! :

*pokes vaguely at the strange, little, furry, longlegged thing that lives in the wall* So I hear my friend Sarah has become your stalker I made the mistake of showing her around h2g2 and she got hooked. She told me on the bus she'd dropped you a line and was waiting for a reply. Amaze her by knowing her name! I presume she hasn't told you what her name is? *snatches hand back as the strange, little, furry, longlegged thing that lives in the wall tries to sink in it's teeth* HEY!

Don't worry, I gave you the reputation you deserve. It was somewhat of a mistake showing them. Vicky said "Oh so your 50 yearold is sending you pictures now?" Sarah said "What's he doing?" Chloe just laughed at me They'll never understand his appeal, they prefer Gareth Gates, Blue and Erinque

We prefer the mature male don't we? Hey! That can be our little club thing! "The Order Of The Maturer Male Fanciers" I like it, has a certain ring to it don't ya think?

It's sports day tommorow! Yay, that means we get to miss two lessons and sit outside for the whole time! They begged me to do javelin but I don't like the idea of parading around in my shorts in front of the whole teaching faculty! I'd much rather keep my dignity thanks very much! They got really mad at me for refusing to do it, there are at least 15 other people that would be willing to do it but they're having a go at me. I'm not going to do it to spite them now...

Apparantly my Dad's been getting nuisance phonecalls from people pretending to be me Apparantly while I was at school he got two phonecalls. One from someone pretending to be me (I have a solid aliby, I was in the middle of my lunch) and then another from 'Emily'. I have never met anyone called Emily and I certainly don't hope to if this is what they're all like
If I find out who did this, I'm gonna carve them up good! Or ask them to dinner

Watch Nate go Scotland crazy!

I love kilts! There was this TV programme on and it was called 'Monarch Of The Glen' (I don't know if you've heard of it or seen it) I had the HUGEST crush on this one called Duncan That orange curly hair, those lovely muscular legs, his kilt, it was too much! Another fact about this programme is that I'm (techincly) in the same scottish clan!

The leading person in 'Monarch Of The Glen' was supposed to be a Hutchinson (however you spell it) and my Great Granny Lilly was a Hutchinson and so was my Dad. Of course he's lost the accent but he looks scottish. I'd die for a scottish accent

Apparantly, in a survey of 100, people were asked which voice they would most trust. And there was a nearly unanimous vote for the scottish! Wahey for us! I may be going to Scotland for my holidays! I'm trying to pull strings so I get to go, the real reason I want to go is so that I can stop off in Durham (oddly enough, where 'St. Jon Quixote: Absent 'til September' goes to college) so I can visit my great Uncle Norman, who is fairly recently bereived. I'd like to see him again

Honestly, I just like the picture! It was the nicest one I could find. I had my heart set on the picture with the elephants with the really long legs, but they didn't have it. Yeah, do some research on Dali! And while you're at it you can find me all the Hannibal pictures your hard drive can handle Sounds like a good deal to me...

Thats all for now Clarice, I have to go lick some steering wheels..
Ta

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Okay, I had written lot, and then my rock decided to shut down! I hate you, do you hear that, rock?! *Sigh* I guess I better start anew WARNING: Important facts may have been altered during the re-writing

Currenly listening to: Bubbles, bubbles and... 'Nod Ya Head' with Will Smith (MTV's playing in the background)

Well, I don't know how many times I have to write this, but: I'M BACK!! Muahahahahaaa... *Waits till music from 'Psycho' dies out*

You know, there's always one problem when we go visit that cabin in the mountain village Skei - when you're about to leave, you have to put an entry in the guest book ! And it's not one of those where you simply scribble your name down, toss it into a corner, no - you have to write what you've done while you've been there ! And when you see the earlier entries of people that have done billions of exciting things, that's slightly unnerving... We went there to relax, and this is what we've done these last few days:
Went for a swin in the local microscopic pool
Paddled in the nearby lake (with a canoe, by the way, it was not like we had only brought paddles )
Went for walks
Eaten, slept and read
So to fill out the entire page that was given to us, I drew a rather neat scetch of me and Tine, sitting in the canoe, I was hysterically waving away a furious bee and she was just about to hit me in the head with her paddle (she aimed at the bee, or so I'm told ) I emphasised that the bee was EVIL, of course!

On the way home we went for a walk though the Amadeus Zoo, which is famous for the good treatment of its animals (which was the reason I aggreed to go there) We of course went mellow when saw the animals. In the end Tine wanted to smuggle out a black monkey, a baby deer and a black baby goat I appearantly had some intimate contact with zebra The darn thing tried to eat my hat. It was very cute, though

Let's see, some last few messages before my rock shut down: As for Duncan, never heard of the bloke. As for Scottish accents, I find it adorable, but I feel nothing beats a nice Irish one . As for licking steering wheel, I'm glad you've found a new hobby

Have fun at Sports day! The only sport I plan to do tomorrow, is to lift the glass of lemonade up to my lips...

Liars when they speak the truth are not believed.
Aristotle (384 BC - 322 BC), from Diogenes Laertius, Lives of Eminent Philosophers

Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth.
Franklin D. Roosevelt, radio address, October 26, 1939

Currently listening to: Some cd or another. It doesn't seem to be playing.. *goes up and whams it* There, that's better

Information may be missing? Hmm, let me guess what it could be. The stuff about Sarah. If she tells you anything odd it was probably her doing it, if she tells you anything that disturbs you, it was probably me doing it..

So your holiday was fun then? Hope you had a good time and that the moose didn't get you. Those moose are evil, didn't you hear my warnings?! They want you, and all those you hold dear, dead! Dead! Dead I say! *cries with all the emotion* I'm sorry, I just don't like moose

After that little out burst I think I'd better calm down now. Phew.. not much has happened here. Except our class won sports day (no thanks to me) and I got my report back. I beat all previous records and got 6 A's and a D. I've never gotten a D before so it was a real shock! It was for PE so it was nothing major

Not much to say really, except "It's the last day of school tommorow!! Aha! I'm catching up with you! I'ts time for me to get my time off school!! Hah hah!!!"
Ahem
Got to go, there are steering wheels that need seeing to

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

Currently listening to: Tine and Daniel sitting in the... er, sofa, K-I-S-S-I... You get my drift Oh, Tine says Hi.

Calm down, calm down - I didn't even see a moose They were probably staring thoughtfully at a sunset somewhere... If you didn't get that, it's perfectly all right, and it gives me an excuse to rant about it now Well, paintings of "Moose in sunset" is probably Norway's best-selling tourist junk. Go anywhere in Norway and you can see paintings of the silhouette of a moose standing on a cliff, looking at a red and orange sunset over a valley... I HATE IT!! Everywhere you go, you see a version of the wretched picture, right next to the plastic figures of those ugly semi-Norwegian trolls!! It's all ugly, and tourists get the idea that each time the sun sets, all the moose in the land runs to the nearest cliff!! Moose aren't thoughtful, inspiring, pretty to look at, or anything! They're big, stupid, dangerous animals! Can't anyone get that in their microschopic brains?

Er, sorry for that. Usual service will be up and running any time now. Back to the mill.

Wow, your class won sports day? Is it exciting, eh, to be in a class that's best in something? Wowee... I wonder how that feels like. Of course, my class always finishes last in everything. Soft ball, basketball, dice throwing, spitting competition, raising money for charity... Wait, one time we played "Who wants to be a Billionaire", we won! All thanks to me, even! And my previous class came third in the annual mushroom-picking contest...

So, your IM nickname ... Want to enlighten us that are so unlucky we live in a country that voted away latin in school ages ago? (Yeah, "unlucky", that's it ) 'Cause I haven't the foggiest. I couldn't recognise the word "Hannibal" anywhere in it, so I'm even more puzzled

Oh, Tine and Daniel just went up to her room to look at photos (or that was what they told me ) So I finally have the whole livingroom for myself! Gotta go and see what I can ruin this time...

"Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age."
-Jeanne Moreau

"Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke."
-Lynda Barry

Currently listening to: The mindless drone of daytime tv (It's ER, they seem to be giving a man CPR in a catholic church in the middle of a sermon Their story lines have really gone down hill..) You know what that means! No more school, no more school! I have no more school (well, for 6 weeks)

*says Hi back to Tine* Hows the book ? *waits for Tine to go upstairs* Ok, I admit I don't have a sister. But when Tine says she's going upstairs to 'look at photos' with her long term boyfriend, I wouldn't believe her. Aren't I the cynical one

I'm somewhat scared of moose, they look labotamised. Which is all a front! Lurking behind that innocent exterior they're evil sadist killers! They want us dead Tilly, why won't anyone believe me! I wouldn't trust a moose as far as I could throw it, which wouldn't be very far. Have you seen the size of them?! They're toying with us, taking their time then WHAM!

Ahh, you want to know what my IM name means? You should have thought of that before your country got rid of Latin in schools Hmm, that does seem somewhat unreasonable. Besides, you should know what it means, I did after all get it from h2g2.
It means: "I have a catapult. Give me all of your money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head."
Good eh?

Annual Mushroom Picking Contest? Gosh your school was very weird I don't know what it's like to win, as technicly I've never really won it or helped to win sportsday or any other form event. I just sit under a tree and work on not getting a tan while all the athletic types prance about in kicker shorts doing all sorts of sporty things. As you can probably tell, I hate those kickershorts they make us wear. I've got a rather funny story about that actually:

We had a substitute PE teacher and we had to wear those shorts as it was summer, I said to the teacher
"You know you've condemned me to hell?"
"I beg your pardon?" she said looking puzzled,
"This is immodesty and in making me wear these shorts I am going against the bible and therefore shall go to hell" I replied, putting on my most sincere and straight face.
"Oh..."
"If you don't mind, could I be exscused to go and pray for my soul?"
"Um, for today you can wear trousers..."

I've tried it again and again but it never works, I suppose it was a fluke Back to the subject of sports day, It was really hot and really dull. Me and Vicky entertained ourselves by each reading a sentance of our own books then letting the other read a sentance of theirs, it became a surprisingly rude (and good) combination. "The Vampire Armand" By Anne Rice and "The Fifth Elephant" By Terry Pratchett is an extremely good combination

I have very exciting news!! Guess what happened to me today! I had my first ever nose bleed! I've never had one before, and boy was I surprised! There was blood all over my hands, face and jumper. It was so cool!!!! Good job Lestat wasn't around..

I may not be online for a while, I'm going to my grandparents tonight. And I'm not sure when I'll be coming back *goes to ask* Ah, I'll be back Sunday. I know you won't be able to cope without my Hannibal antics, but I beg you. Be strong and try to manage It's a friend of the family's party so I'm being dragged along, maybe I could slip onto their computer and post a little somthing *ie. two words*

The people we're going to see are a friend of my Mum's and her daughter. The daughter only likes me beacause I know how to work the Sims, she's 4 years in my junior and I'm expected to be her friend when really I can't stand her. She's so selfish it's not true, she rang me up on Christmas day "Um, hi Natalie. I got the Sims livin it up and the Rose bud klapaucius cheat won't work... oh and my Mum says I wish you a merry christmas.." and she rang me on my birthday "Hi Natalie, I was just asking do you know anymore cheats for The Sims..?" I put the phone down

Well, I'll leave you to wrecking the room. May I suggest scuba diving in the punch bowl Oh yeah, have you moved the fish to their new home yet?

-R.G.W
[RESEARCHER.GONE.WRONG]

PS. This posting is exeptionally long to make up for having nothing to say yesterday

Currently listening to: Tine and Daniel standing in the kitchen, K-I-S-S-I... The usual And cooking sausages.

Oh, and Tine says the book is dull. Not enough weird pictures to giggle at

Congratulation with your first ever, er, nose bleed Tine says so too. I wish you many more, if that's what you wish... I went through my whole childhood nose bleeding Quite traumatizing, really: I fell off the swing and started bleeding, I laughed too hard and started bleeding, I ate eggs on toast and started bleeding... I wished for a sign around my neck saying, 'Fragile!' But all I got for my birthday was a pink Barbie Cadillac...

Oh, the whole reading one sentence each from a random page in a book can be quite fun! I remember I once tried that with 'Ivanhoe' and an ex-friend with 'Harry Potter'. That story turned out kinda freaky ...

No, we haven't moved the fish yet - it's a rather big aquarium, so we have to wait until the algae has started growing and the temperature is stable . We plan to put some neon tetra in the punchowl after that, cause I love how they shine in the light

You didn't have anything to say yesterday, eh? I think I've caught it This weather makes my memory disappear, and I don't even feel for a rant... I have a little lie down somewhere.

And have fun at your grandparents and with that evil girl... Rip her away from the Sims and see if you can log on h2g2 Although that may be the script for 'Mission Impossible: 3' (Hey, who's Tom Cruise gonna play then? I know, Lestat. He was really cool in that part...

Toodles!

Currently listening to: Some chirpy birds singing outside *gets gun, aims and fires* Ha ha! That'll teach you to be so goddamn happy. It's too hot to be happy To drown out the happiness I'm gonna put a CD on... ahh! 'Nightshift' by The Commodores/Lionel Richie

Why do you cringe when you say 'Congratulation with your first ever, er, nose bleed'? *semi-winks*
Ah, you have to understand I was a very strange young kid. No matter what I did I'd never seem to get a nosebleed, even when I broke my nose. So this nosebleed is a novel experience. And the blood, it was everywhere! I used about 14 tissues! Woah, I'm a regular vampire

Just out of curiousity, is Tine standing there reading what I write or are you telling her? And do Tine and Daniel sit there K-I-S-S-I.. all day or do they do other things together too? Besides 'look at photos' of course.. Oh, and when Tine says 'Not enough weird pictures to giggle at' does she mean Not enough weird pictures to goggle at I think I crossed a line, I'd better go now..

Don't worry, even if you hadn't told me to rip her away from the Sims and see if you can log on h2g2, I'd have done it anyway. I hate that child! It's going to be hell.. everyone at these parties are always much older or much younger or complete 's who I have nothing in common with.

I've got some very exciting news! Over the road from me, the bbc are filming 'IN DEEP III' starring Nick Berry & Stephen Tompkinson as Undercover Police Officers. If you ever see it in Norway when it gets shown on bbc 1 or 2, the house (no 14) where someones mother lives is opposite my house! Yay!

Well, I've gotta go and pack.