Enthusiastic, nay rapturous, Introduction to The Oppressed Pipe of Great Magnitude

Pointless pipe trivia of the day: Fill in the 'pipes' with real words to discover the names of these technological TV teasers. Then name the link between the shows:

Robot Pipes and Tomorrow's Pipe (Answer is at bottom of page)

Regarding the pipe trivia, should I keep the answers at the bottom for all to see or should I hold a competition in which the first person to answer correctly, or the person who pays me the best complements, wins an imaginery prize.

Hey, you!!! Look at these tasty Pipe Trivia Archives

The Adventures of Wesley Pipes

Episode Seven

Wesley Pipes, intrepid monkey trainer, rounded up the last member in his crack squad of ‘money collectors’. Future inhabitants of this unanimous town would come to remember the infamous names of this multi-talented squad. Unfortunately this narrator presently cannot.

Wesley appointed the one with the skinhead as lookout and this move soon bore fruit as a passing pensioner was spotted.

Less shrewd was his decision to give the little one with the funny eyes the job of ‘money collecting’. Returning to the group sporting a distinct lack of ‘readies’ and a bloody nose, the little one with the funny eyes gave Wesley a few ineffective jabs to the stomach then ran off warning that he was going to tell his mummy.

Still penniless and now the proud owner of some mischievous children, Wesley decided to orchestrate the next raid himself. He spotted a woman across the street and instructed the longhaired one with the teddy bear to run around and steal this woman’s purse while he chatted to her. Walking towards the prey he gave her a suggestive wink. “The weather in spring is favourable to the foreign traveller,” remarked Wesley, attempting to woo with his intellectualising.

“But to the home-grown this will never satisfy,” she replied cryptically. “Are you satisfied?”

“I…er. What?” Wesley stumbled as he noticed the longhaired one with the teddy bear remove the woman’s purse.

“Stop messing around. Come with me.” Wesley was led off with haste towards a waiting motorpipe, to the bemusement of his, now loaded, gang. “You know, I thought you’d be taller…”

TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR THE CONTINUATION OF THESE EGG-CELLENT ADVENTURES

Wesley Pipes Archives

This page is best viewed at right-angles to reality

Wouldn't everything be really great if I gave you an incredible, insightful and informative perspective of the life of a small pipe, who is simply attempting to get through this tumultuous journey without too many scratches and only a small amount of subversity. Unfortunately...

Join the Straight Hedge club

Straight Hedge is a movement that began in the late seventies with a band named Minor Threat. Their song 'Out of Step' preached the virtues of keeping an upright shrubbery while also explaining how a person could maintain the ability to preserve a straight hedge. (I) don't smoke, don't drink, don't f**k; At least I can f**king think. This line clearly outlines the foundations of how the correct mentality is obtained. Engaging in promiscuous sexual activity, alcohol and nicotine all contribute to the social detriment that is the wonky hedge. Minor Threat later revised the lyrics to include the lines This is no set of rules. I'm not telling you what to do. This was intended to give the movement a less pushy image, representing the fact that people have different approaches to maintaining their hedges. Another Minor Threat song 'In My Eyes' unleashes a vicious verbal attack against the recent tendency of popular youth culture to embrace unkempt hedgelines. The song also pointed out the possible danger, to the eyes of passing pedestrians, caused by hedge branches sticking out (the number one sign of a non-straight hedge).

I thought this was Straight Edge

We all know the tendency that people have to misquote speakers and the Straight Hedge movement received a similar setback when one of its founding fathers, Ian MacKaye, was misquoted while talking about the Straight Hedge 'religion'. So the Straight Edge movement was born and millions of unthinking fools have followed this farce. Ian himself has attempted, on numerous occasions, to enlighten the duped but to no avail. The name Straight Edge stuck and following this the Straight Hedge movement has been ridiculed as some sort of joke. As Morpheus said in the Matrix:
"Fate, it seems, is not without a certain sense of irony"
Although maybe he didn't. I might be misquoting him and misrepresenting his beliefs so take no notice of that quote.

Straight Edgers on h2g2

Yes I have seen some of these misguided fools wandering around the h2g2 community; You might have too. If you do see them please do not ridicule or belittle their illgotten 'movement'. A major part of the Straight Hedge philosophy is that others should not be mistreated unless their hedges are not up-to-scratch. However do please attempt to enlighten these media manipulated conformists as to the true nature of Minor Threat's creation.

What can you do?

You may laugh at us for our beliefs but we will simply laugh back at you for your horrible hedges. The fact is, you can't beat us so why not join us? Reply to this entry and I will post a link to your user page in this space so all can know that you are a follower of the Straight Hedge philosophy.

Some Handy Links - ENJOY!!!!!!!

Big Mad Mr. T
Comrade Rumble
Rage Against The Machine
Radiohead
Indymedia
The Pregnants
Alternative Tentacles
Weezer
Michael Moore
Digital Library
Google
Books On-line
Some free books available on-line (Be aware that these books can take up around 200 pages of full A4 so you'll need plenty of paper to print them all out)
Now and Then: The ABC of Communist Anarchism
Steal This Book
Christian Anarchy
1984
Animal Farm
A+ Research and Writing for School and College projects

Pipe Trivia answers

The answer is: Robot Wars and Tomorrow's World. The link is Phillipa Forrester. Oh, yes!

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