Journal Entries
greenies
Posted Jul 6, 2005
waiting and wanting
wishing and hoping
for things lost along this fair way
skipping the lines and
retreating behind
the mask of my naivete
why am I pausing
when I could be laughing
why do I dare wax and wane
believe me when I say
I don't know the reason
for stalling and useless delay
I want to be flying
don't fault me for trying
while grounded I'm certain to stay
I need some distraction
to keep me from acting
I'm scared to get carried away.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jul 6, 2005
vacation
Posted Jul 1, 2005
I am going camping in the woods this weekend for the Fourth of July, which, as some of you may know, is the day we yanks celebrate Independance from the intolerable monarchy of Britain. (tongue-in-cheek)
I happen to like Britain very much, though I have not been there, and am exceedingly grateful, despite the circumstances at the time, that we got our start from you. I am glad, also, that our relationship has steadily improved over the years. I do understand, however, that most Brits think Americans are really dumb, anyway. This doesn't bother me, since it's really only a natural conclusion to arrive at considering most of our citizenry's poor manners and such.
Independance day is another excuse for a party, as far as I'm concerned, and I am always game for a day off of work. The fireworks are nice, too. Plus, patriotism is fun.
Anyway, I hope there are no hard feelings. If it weren't for us, you'd probably rule the world. Which, all things considered, could have been ok. I guess we'll never know.
In any case, I won't be around until next week. 'Bye.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jul 1, 2005
potential
Posted Jun 30, 2005
According to good old mom and dad, I am not living up to my potential. I just want to put that out there. What girl at 23, just out of college, struggling to pay off student loans and a car and bills, actually lives up to her "supposed" potential?
And just what potential is that, I ask? But that's too much like fishing for compliments, so I don't really ask it. It's a good question, though.
Is it the potential to write well? To be a great muscician? To serve God? To make a lot of money and become self-sufficient? To be a good person?
And what of my dreams and desires? What about my opportunities, or lack thereof? What about debts and rent and food that has to be paid for, dreams or not?
I think I can accomplish all of my dreams. As well as those other things, I'd like to learn to dance well, to practice a martial art, to be a good role model and counselor, to touch and love people, to learn, and to become conformed to the likeness of Christ. I guess I just don't care how long it takes or in what order.
I don't have it now, and that's ok with me. I am doing what I think best for now, and that's all I can do. My parents, like most parents, want the best for me, better than they had, quicker and easier. It's irritating! It's sweet, but irritating. I may not know what I want, but I'm a heck of a lot closer to it than they are. They may think they know what I want, they may even "know best," but it's just not up to them, is it?
It's up to me. Inept, confused, excited, overwhelmed, uncertain, optimistic, dreamy, broken and afraid.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jun 30, 2005
this community as it compares to others
Posted Jun 28, 2005
It seems like there are a thousand different places to hang one's hat on the internet. Numerous sites offer online journals and communities like Friendster and Myspace have really started something, especially among young people.
I myself am a member of myspace and while I think it is fun, it is a bit juvenile. I keep in touch with friends through it and still post most of my journal entries to my blog there. The intellectual atmosphere is pretty non-existent, however, and I've begun to think some of my best-written journal entries would be better exposed here on this site, where I can at least get intelligent feedback from more than two people. I am torn, in that I like H2G2 much, much more than myspace, but my friends are on myspace, so I don't want to leave. On the other hand, this community provides anonymity that on MySpace I have already forfeited. The two sites are so different atmospherically that they can serve totally different purposes and not get in the way of each other at all.
The Guide and this community is vastly more interesting, challenging, and engaging than myspace or friendster could ever be. Just reading entries alone is worth the time spent, but posting something and getting a response from an accomplished adult is icing on the cake. I love this sense I get of appreciation for things worthy of thinking on and caring about, not just sex and beer. Of course, there are undoubtedly plenty of sex fans and beer lovers who also manage to contribute meaningfully to the Guide and the community. I think you get the point, though. h2g2 is classy. What a relief.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jun 28, 2005
horrific waste of time
Posted Jun 27, 2005
I just spent the whole day at work just kind of lazing around reading and perusing the internet. I did some work. Just not the whole time. Terribly dishonest of me, I know.
I think my favorite author is Jane Austen. Isn't that odd? I plan to do some research on her. Should be fun. I read "Northanger Abbey" today and I thought it was delightful. The funniest thing about when I read one of her novels is that I start to write and even talk like her. I use antiquated vocabulary and old-fashioned sentence structure...I love it.
I don't know why I love it so much. Jane's literature, that is. One of the reasons might be that she writes perfectly dramatic love stories without any sex. Her characters are just the most chaste creatures ever. I like that. Novelists who resort to pages and pages of sex scenes are using fillers for a reason, probably because they've written the same story fifty-three times with only the barest of detail changes. They've no imagination, is the problem. Jane has imagination. At least, enough to write pages and pages about her varied characters, even if they do have very similar settings and situations. She almost always keeps me guessing, as well, at least the first time through. And sometimes the second, as with Pride and Prejudice, which, I think, is my favorite novel of hers. It takes a couple of readings to get the whole picture, sometimes.
I am amazed at the timelessness of certain phrases, situations and ironies. Austen wrote at the turn of the 19th century, and yet, her observations are as sharp and true now as they were then. For example, there is a speech in Northanger Abbey which Henry makes about the word "nice" and it's total lack of real meaning due to over and mis-use. My freshman year at college I remember an upperclassmen named Josh lamenting the same thing, only he also included such words as "sweet" and "interesting" as having shared the fate of the ubiquitous "nice." Some things never change, except, perhaps, the voices speaking the sentiments. I would also venture to say that no one is quite like Jane Austen as a builder of real, full, rich characters. Any current novelist would do well to learn a few things from the mistress herself.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jun 27, 2005
Back to MessyJessie--defying description daily's Personal Space Home
MessyJessie--defying description daily
Researcher U1652893
Write an Entry
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."