h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[eyes glitter] Fascinating.

I think I'll shove Kudos into a VR world instead of the Krylma KO. That would definitely work, if I could think of a setting and nemesis in this world that would be insanely wicked enough.

*Stares at the hit list*

Someone get Happy Dude in here. I think I've found a use for his insanity.

[sea] hahahahahaha! brilliant!!!

Ahhhh...you have discovered Kudos's one true foe and annoyance...excellent!

Shall I send for him?

*BBW, in human form, walks in carrying something that looks like a laptop computer.*

Before you do what you are planning, Minos, perhaps you might like me to insert a keyword into his brain.

*As he speaks, BBW is carefully inserting wires into particular places in the brain. The wires lead to the laptop. BBW fires up the laptop*

I will program it so that it will only respond to the keyword spoken in your voice, or in my voice (as backup). When he hears you or me saying the keyword, he will stop whatever he is doing and await our instructions, which he will carry out to the best of his abilities.
There. It is done.

*Turns the laptop screen so that KL can read the keyword: SODUK*

Soduk. Good work, Big Bad Werewolf. Nice to see you again, by the way.

Oh, and yes, someone send for Happy.

*Turns to Big Bad Werewolf*

I'm not sure if you've met Happy. If not, prepare thyself.

*NYC makes his best KL impression*

soduk! SODUK!

...aww, darn.

*NYC goes back to the vending machine in the lounge*

Sorry, NYC. It's difficult to really get the tone of a malevolent human with reptillian/amphibian DNA.

*Begins furiously typing at a computer*

What kind of setting do you recommend? I've always been impartial to caverns, myself. Or endless deserts.

endless deserts sound good. I've always hated the dank.

Hi Guys, anybody seen(?) evillene around here ?

Endless deserts won't work. Sorry, but Petronius is a desert planet...very very hot but I LOVE those golden deserts.

Well...WAS a desert planet, until Zeb came along and made it NO planet at all...

Anyway. If you wanna know what Kudos would hate, it's the dark plus Happy Dude plus Evillene...if Happy Dude is trying to *ahem* get Evillene, then Kudos will get very jealous.

*Corrupt whispers "SODUK" in Kudos's ear and wakes him*

A-ha. So SOMEONE **can** replicate your voice, Krylma...don't worry, I'm not a turncoat.

Kudos, go kiss Krylma's feet and erase him off your hit list.

*Kudos does what Corrupt says*

Excellent. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Soduk!

*Kudos stops and looks at BBW*

Kudos, lay back down and let up put the top of your head back on.

*Kudos obediently lays back down and closes his eyes. BBW hastily removes the wires from his brain.*

I SAID "ANYONE SEEN EVILLENE AROUND HERE ?"

Sultandude sneaks in and places an autographed copy of his book "THE BOOK OF TRICKY SITUATIONS" in Kudos's backpack under his towel. Shouts "Don't Panic!" and retires to the Hieneken tent.

Happy Dude, I summoned you here because we need you, as Kudos' arch nemesis, to battle with him in a virtual world.

Sounds Fun

?Have you seen evillene recentely ?

[sea] she's here, happy.

[evillene] SHUT UP, SEA.

[sea] she's right over there in that chair, actually. *points*

[evillene] SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy runs over and gives evillene a big sloppy Kiss

Thanks Sea.

*sea falls on the floor laughing*

[sea] my.... pleasure.... happy.....

*evillene screams*

[evillene] I'M GOING TO KILL YOU SEA!!!!!!!!

*evillene jumps on sea, who is too busy laughing hysterically to fight back*