h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Texas requires all architects to be fingerprinted.
http://www.theguardian.com/law/2013/dec/31/new-year-new-rules-changes-2014

Seriously?

Well, I'd certainly call a great many architects criminal for what they've done to our streets, towns and cities (I'm looking at you in particular, but by no means exclusively, Alison and Peter Smithson ), but that seems a bit... perplexing

Wow!...

I looked into this and discovered that this requirement is meant to protect children.

“Sometime back, the legislature became convinced that if there was an individual licensed by the state who had access to someone’s kids, to their house, to their money, or to drugs or explosives, then steps needed to be taken to do a more thorough background check,” David Lancaster, senior advocate of Texas Society of Architects, told AN. “When we heard about it being added to our Sunset Bill this time our initial reaction was, ‘Architects? Are you kidding me?’”

Yep. It's important to note that this just brings architects into the fold of all other professionals across this "freedom luvin" state that have to submit to fingerprinting and background checks for no rational reason whatsoever.

I think this is a case of "when they came for the" [insert profession here] and the architects are the last in line.

http://www.examiner.com/article/with-jan-1-fingerprinting-required-for-texas-architects

I had to get fingerprinted when I was going through the residency process. Whenever anyone asks me for some kind of identification and they look askance my green card because it isn't a Texas driving licence or ID card, I point out that in order to get it I've been fingerprinted and approved as Good Person by the FBI.

Then I ask "Have you?"

Touchy subject for me.

I carry an HSPD-12 badge. That required a very thorough background check, finger printing, brief interviews with people who know me and I had to sign 4, countem' FOUR, privacy waivers including my financial and medical history.

And that badge is NOT a valid form of ID. It just lets me get on the property and use a government computer.

This might be a good time to wheel out the story again about how the green card wasn't good enough to use as an ID when I wanted to buy my bus pass with a debit card. They wanted a driving licence for verification.

I don't have a driving licence, that's why I use the bus!!!

Brilliant.

"Detectives continue to investigate how a man who was found on the A66 in the early hours of Thursday came by his serious injuries."
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-tees-26592748

Seriously?

He was dipping his bread in someone else's gravy, someone else didn't care for it, took his bread away. Sorted. My invoice is in the post; terms: payment in full within 30 days.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-27069611
Portland dumps 38m gallons of water after urination

Seriously? What an over-reaction, regardless of the fact that the Pacific north-west gets plenty of rainfall. I'm guessing - an educated guess I might add - that all water is treated between leaving the reservoir and emerging from the taps in people's kitchen sinks, right? A pint of pee in 38m gallons... that's got to be a level of concentration normally only found in homoeopathic mixtures, I reckon

I remember an almost identical story from a couple of years ago. It might have been the same reservoir. Wherever it was I remember they also dumped millions of gallons of water and cleaned the reservoir. But the thing I distinctly remember was the photo of the reservoir... with ducks on it.

How in the hell is the urine from one man consequential when they obviously remove the feces and urine from hundreds of ducks (and fish, dogs, deer, squirrels, etc.)?

Speaking of which, how in the hell does it cost $4000 to run a water hose and rinse off the Alamo?

http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Man-who-whizzed-on-Alamo-to-do-time-5402348.php

18 months in jail for peeing on the Alamo?

Ozzy got banned from San Antonio until he agreed to a $10,000 "donation".

Ah, well, you know - conservators had to be brought in to restore it to its historically accurate condition, and them folks don't come cheap. I'm surprised it only cost four grand

My San Antonio seem to have a similar kind of fondness for detail and accuracy as the BBC - "Athens started urinating on the front of the mission — to the left of the front door — at about 9:25 p.m. on a Saturday in April 2012 when he was tackled by an Alamo Ranger, according to court records."

Presumably he stopped urinating when he was tackled by the Ranger. One would certainly hope so Or if not, he at least had the decency to pay for a replacement uniform, the original having been thrown away, because as we know from the Portland story, anything that gets peed in or on has to be discarded

Yes... biological contamination as we say here at NASA.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/10777222/From-goof-to-maths-genius-thanks-to-a-blow-to-the-head.html
From 'goof' to maths genius thanks to a blow to the head

Seriously? Boy, could I use something like that. I think I need to get drunk and get into a fight. I usually have no problem with the first part, it's the second that I've had no practice at.

Physiology from Looney Toons?

Get hit on the head and see patterns.

A job listing on Craigslist:

Museum Store Sale and Visitor Services Associate
Part Time Hourly Position. College degree. Retail Experience required. Bilingual preferred (Spanish/English).

Store Duties: sales & other retail duties. Previous Retail and Merchandising Experience; Excellent sales ability; Organized, detailed; Ability to work independently; self-motivated; Ability to work as a member of a fast-paced team; Provide exceptional customer service; Greet visitors and customers; Answer and direct incoming calls with courtesy and in a welcoming manner; Manage volunteers

Visitor Services: Greet visitors, inform of about museum and events and other services. PC skills: Point of Sales, excel, word processing.
ACT database -- will train.


You need a college degree to get a job selling gee-gaws at a tiny museum I've never seen anyone go into, and telling people which way to the khazi? Seriously?

And "fast-paced"? Not in that place

By the way. For 'fast-paced' in any any job ad, read 'we cut costs by understaffing and you will be working your arse off'.

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-norfolk-28207300

Three big pictures of the kid that take up more column inches than the story itself? Seriously?

"If it bleeds, it leads."

What really gets on my last nerve is the nasty habit of local TV news reporters sticking their cameras and mics in the faces of grieving families after tragic crimes and accidents. Even worse is when they can't find a family member or close friend, they'll find literally the next person on the block and interview that person, a person who has absolutely nothing to do with the story, just to get some sort of emotional reaction to thrust in the faces of viewers at home sitting down to dinner.

They don't have to interview anyone on screen. They could just report the sad and disturbing facts, but that doesn't win awards.

I'm often reminded of that film Broadcast News. How many cameras did you have when you did the interview? Just one? Then how did you get the cutaways of yourself crying during the interview?

They don't have to interview anyone on-screen, they don't need even one picture in the website story, and I could really do without the mawkish comments.

Not newsworthy.

I really thought this looked worth noting down with an intention to make it at some point? Seriously?

Onion tart

Ingredients
125g/4oz butter
14 medium onions, very finely chopped
100ml/3½fl oz white wine vinegar
2 tbsp soft light brown sugar
1 tsp Dijon mustard
2 tsp sea salt flakes
1 ready-cooked savoury pastry case
50g/2oz parmesan, freshly grated

Method
Melt the butter in a large heavy-based non-reactive pan with a lid over a very low heat. Add the onions and cook with the lid on, stirring regularly to ensure the onions do not burn, for about two hours. The onions should be very soft, sticky and brown.

Turn up the heat and add the vinegar, sugar, mustard and salt. Cook until the vinegar has almost completely reduced. Stir regularly for about 30 minutes to prevent the onions burning, until the onions are a deep golden-brown. (A little colour from the bottom of the pan is fine - just stir it in).

Preheat the oven to 200C/400F/Gas 6.

Fill the ready-cooked pastry case with the onion mixture and smooth it out evenly with a spatula. Sprinkle with grated parmesan season with freshly ground black pepper.

Bake the tart in the oven for 20 minutes. Remove and leave to rest for ten minutes.

To serve, slice while warm and serve on warmed plates.


I need to watch that programme (What to Eat Now) again to remind myself of why a pie filled with little more than onions looked so tasty and nutritious.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that when I tried to open the relevant BBC Food page to look at it again ( http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/oniontart_89905 ) I got this:

"Unfortunately, we can't find the recipe you're looking for. This may be because it has been taken down from the BBC Food website, which happens when our rights to publish a recipe expire."

Seriously, BBC? It's from a BBC programme

I'm getting unbelievably with the whole problem of rights issues. Come the revolution...

But I know how to work the Wayback Machine

http://web.archive.org/web/20130111125124/http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/oniontart_89905