h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*eyes glaze over. Begins to sway. Collapses into the arms of a puzzled NYC (cinematic conventions are hard to break), who sudden;y realises what he is doing and lets go, allowing UH to land on his foot. With chortlesome results*

[sea] stop... *gasp* tickling... HAHAHAAHAHA... me.... *hiccup*

*sea thrashes on the floor, holding half of the tickling stick in her hand, then notices the stick and starts tickling happy with it. HARD*

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[To put it succinctly, WHUM WHUM KSH WHUM KSH three times over]

*NYC kicks UH off his shoe, and whips three throwing knives in Happy's direction. Happy dodges two, but gets distracted by sea's tickling rampage, and has the third knife hit him squarely in the shoulder*

[Happy] that tickles...

*Happy promptly faints, presumably at the sight of his own blood*

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Giguschild bursts from the heating vent in the cieling with a clatter of metal kibbles. He springs lightly towards the wall just in time to avoid the evil . It follows him at lightning speed while he dodges and somersaults madly around the place, keeping the shortest of steps ahead. Suddenly, he trips over the prone form of Happy and clatters to the floor. The latches onto his thigh, acid blood spurting all over Happy's clothes and, more importantly, face. Giguschild rolls sideways and kicks out with his leg, trying to dislodge the intent smiley...his foot catches Emar on the shin and the puppeteer is thrown to the floor. Giguschild stops and sits up...clasping his beclawed hands around the round object, Giguschild's arms tense and bulge; the smiley squeaks and strains, and then implodes, spraying hard plastic fragments onto the floor. Giguschild propmptly rolls over again and swings his arm out, catching Emar full in the stomach with his sharp elbow...there is a painful sounding squelch. Not waiting to assess the damage, Giguschild springs to his feet.

Wooooooooooooo - what happened ?

Trust me. You do NOT want to know.

[Flopsy comes up beside him]

And I'm glad for all your sakes none of you has tried to attack ME. But just to set an example ...

[He raises his finger and lazily points at Happy Dude, the neck of whom Flopsy latches onto.]

*sea giggles at the sight of happy's face slowly melting off, then notices that her half of the so-called "tickling stick" is rapidly disintegrating. she throws it away from her, and it hits UH in the head*

[sea] whoopsie.

*sea pulls NYC's knife out of happy's shoulder and looks at it*

[sea] wow, NYC, you have some pretty knives...

*sea tosses it back to him, and he catches it perfectly by the handle*

happy gives flopsy a big hug - 'your just like a big cuddley toy really ?'

I gotta large bunch of 'em. not only are they pretty, but they talk to. watch!

[knife] stop all the yapping, and stick me in somebody! use me! USE ME!!!

[NYC] I already used you. what will the other knives say? they haven't gotten a chance yet...

[knife] oh, shut up and kill someone for the love of Bob! I'm dieing of boredom! if you don't shove me in Happy's gut in the next ten seconds, I'll just have to stick YOU!

*NYC throws the knife again into Happy's gut; the knife sighs in contentment*

*sea stares at NYC with a look of concern. evillene falls to the floor, laughing hysterically and clutching her stomach*

*With a shout, UH withdraws his trusty duellinh herring and lofts it above his head. *

He shouts something in a He-Man stylee and proceeds to slap NYC repeatedly about the head and neck

Zeb(holding the Necronomicon open, toward Giguschild): Read and despair of the infinite horror of the cosmos, unenlightened insect!



Emar: Uh, Zeb, if you're trying to drive him insane, I don't think Xenomorph visual organs pick up ink writing too well; He can't read the book.

Zeb: Oh crap.



Emar/Zeb: WAHHHHHHHHHAHHAHHAHHHHHAHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHAHHHHHAHHHHHH...... (**CRASH*SHATTER*plink***!!)!!

Pull out a gun and shiots Yow through thwall

a faint owww is heard


I was climbing up the wall not into and behind it


*gets to a ledge and begins to put something together*

*I think what Giguschild means is that his shot blasts Yo through the wall, in which case a lot more than a faint "owww" is heard, and Yo does not, in fact, reach the ledge*

Well, actually it was a reference to...never mind. The spelling, and...ah forget it. Actually...could it be that...? No, that would be *too* depressing. Well, in fact it's depressing either way, but...ah, whatever.

PS And anyway, *I* wouldn't usse a gun! Muh!