h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: The Stretcher: Coming out (of his shell) - A45847623
Author: 9 <star> Frenchbean - midsummer gardener, dodging hailstones - U236943

This is my contribution to The Stretcher, closing date 15.1.09


Frenchbean

Oh, I LIKE this excursis into nature.

That really is a hermit crab.

dmg

Fantastic! I didn't know if anybody would figure it out

I love the emerges/ merges echo.

Thank you

Very nice indeed! I did worry that I was being too literal in thinking it was about a hermit crab, so I'm glad to find I was right

Good luck in the competition!

I like the image of the hermit crab.

I did wonder why you had put some of your line breaks where you have done. Line breaks tend to enforce pauses, so the poem might flow better if you allowed some of the lines to be a bit longer.

Another interesting shell variation.
I, too, would like to see this with fewer line breaks.

Like it Fb

I disagree with changing the line breaks, as I feel that helps convey the furtiveness of the creature...

My

I shan't be changing the line breaks I'm happy with it as is.

"There is no right or wrong, good or bad in artistic endeavour: only like or dislike"

And I like the short lines. (We had a hermit crab once, he moved like that.)

What a terrific sense of shrugging out of a too small, too restrictive armour - the brief realisation of vulnerability, then the contentment of a return to safety in a more comfortable shelter

Blissful

Thank you

I'd forgotten how good it is to have something being commented on... It's a long time since I submitted anything

Ms GB

Usizing to exoskeletal necessity"

Enjoyed it very much.

I agree. The punchy style conveys mechanical jerkiness. It's how I think of a crab going about it's business.

Greetings Frenchbean and welcome to the AWW . We'd like to give your hermit crab a week's publicity on the front page. If you think he could cope with that?

Congratulations on an UnderGuide selection . I usually post bits or all (if printable) of the UnderGuide's QA's opinions, but he's not added anything to the Stretcher comments.

On behalf of the UG Eds, I'll say it's a very enjoyable read,
UG Eds

How lovely Yes, I think he could handle the glare of publicity, just as long as he can go back into his shell again afterwards and be sure of not being disturbed

Fb